My thanks to Penguin Random House U.K. and Ebury Publishing for an ARC via NetGalley.

While only an occasional reader of celebrity memoirs, Jill Soloway has a fluid writing style that drew me quite quickly into their world.

‘Transparent’ is clearly a passion project for Soloway and that enthusiasm for the stories told and the people involved in its production shines through. I have not seen the show but have since added it to my watchlist.

Soloway’s writing about the breakdown of their marriage, exploration of their evolving sexuality and various personal trials was honest and at times quite raw. Not always comfortable to read but it is important I feel for a memoir to have weight rather than be mainly self-promoting and ego-stroking.

There were a lot of people referenced in the book whom I had no knowledge of, which is a characteristic of a celebrity memoir but I figured that I could always use Google if wanted more background on anyone.

I freely admit to feeling an outsider regarding some of the gender issues explored but I did feel better informed after reading it.

It was a 3.5 for me, rounded to 4.

She Wants It by Jill Soloway

This is a celebrity memoir, staring Jill Soloway. It starts well with her relatively happy family life, a husband and two sons, but then she received a call from her father announcing he is trans. She gradually came to terms with the news and accepted ‘moppa’.

However, the book was then about how she used her experiences to write Transparent, the award winning show on Amazon. It did feel very much an advert for the show at points (a great show it is to I might add), but in my opinion it did drag on a bit.

Jill then wrote about her own sexuality, her realisation she was actually a non-binary person, and her relationships with women. She also co-wrote a manifesto to ‘topple the patriarchy’, but it read a little like a teenage rant and not something I’ve heard of in real life here in the UK, so maybe it’s more relevant in the US. It is a very honest, enlightening book about gender identity, human emotions, feelings and acceptance and worth a read.

I would like to thank the Author/the Publishers/NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for a fair and honest review

I am always late to the party – metaphorically speaking, I mean. I am usually early for everything else because I do not know how to negotiate a late entrance. I feel like at some point in these last few years I fell into a deep sleep from which I remember… well, nothing.

Finding my way back into the real world has been difficult. I keep being reminded that I have missed lifetimes of content and there are stimuli all around, surrounding me, enfolding me, suffocating me. I end up catching glimpses, not having enough mental space to go through wholeness. Then I found Transparent.

It did not demand attention. Instead, it offered itself to me in the most unreserved of ways. I felt like I was gaining time instead of wasting it, gaining life. It had, it has, a soul, and that is why I just finished reading She Wants It: Desire, Power, and Toppling the Patriarchy.

This book is not a lecture. This book is a memoir, a life. As such, there are questionable decisions, intrusive thoughts, delirious moments, unabashed vulnerability. The reader is taken on a tour during which doors are unlocked, windows are opened, basements revisited and attics discovered. There is light and darkness, lost and found, ashes and dust. There is everything you would expect to find if you were given a free pass to someone’s mind… and more.

The writing is incredibly open, honest, real. It feels like a conversation, the sort one dreams of having with a stranger while stranded at an airport. In this non-place, headed to different corners of the world that will probably never again meet, one thing leads to another and words flow and fill time without consequence. Later on, at random moments and stages, bits and pieces will be recalled and become definite.

She Wants It: Desire, Power, and Toppling the Patriarchy by Jill Soloway is a thought-provoking journey through a landscape on the brink of a revolution, both personally and universally. It might not be what you are looking for, but you will find hope in it.

ARC provided by Penguin Random House UK, Ebury Publishing via NetGalley.

I am so glad I read this book. I loved the h9nesty, the humanity, the directness of this book it explores transgender and non binary in a very accessible way, and let’s us know, in no uncertain terms, that any one of us could be affected, any one is us could be shocked, surprised or hurled into an unknown world by our loved ones. I really recommend it

When I requested this book had not watched ’Transparent ’ although I had heard of it. It's is an ok book but I did feel that the book had a bit of an identity crisis. I couldn't work out what genre it was from.
It's ok.
Thanks to both netgalley and Penguin Random House the UK for giving me the opportunity to read She Wants It's by Jill Soloway in exchange for my honest unbiased review.

I had not heard of Soloway before reading this, though I was vaguely aware of the amazon show Transparent, and this was a wonderful primer for me on just how a show that is as inclusive and authentic as Transparent gets made.
I empathised with Jill, and loved reading her story, her own account of coming to terms with her own queerness, and embracing the queerness of others around her, especially that of her Moppa, who transitions at a later stage of life.
This is the glance into queer culture, arts and society that I think everyone should read - queer people are, in fact, just people, and yet their queerness helps to create a very special culture that a lot of people in the spectrum owe their lives and sanity to.
Being queer has always been a central part of my identity, and Jill's book really resonates with me for that reason - it's her own identity that is being transmuted and transformed in a crucible of living her authentic self, alongside her Moppa and her family.
I also really appreciated the insights she made after the Weinstein incident, seeing that Transparent was affected by it, and I commend her for writing frankly and honestly about how you can feel nothing but righteousness but only seconds later wish it could all just go away when suddenly, your own show and livelihood is also in the crossfire. Her acknowledging these feelings but not letting them affect the movement really made me feel like like, yes, this is a good person.
I am now going to go and watch Transparent!
Will seek out more of Jill's work.
Recommended.

I went into this book completely blind, I’ve never seen transparent (although I have heard of it) and have never heard of Jill Soloway. However, the blurb interested me and as biographical books aren’t my usual read I thought I would give it a go. This was a truly interesting insight into the lives of someone who is transitioning and the exploration into her gender and sexuality. A very well written and insightful book.

I found this book really gripping and interesting to start with. Jill Soloway is a writer/director who used the story of her fathers transition to make hit tv show Transparent. The book starts of with her parent coming out as transgender and how the family dealt with it but goes on to tell you more about Soloway's life after and once the series had been a success. I know it is an autobiography but I found this excruciatingly self indulgent and quite difficult to read.

She Wants It is incredibly honest and open, even to the detriment of the author. It is Jill Soloway's origin story. One day, the phone rings. Jill's moody and depressed father comes out to his daughter as trans. He has been living a lie his whole life, casting a shadow over his marriage and children. Now he has given himself permission to be his true self: Carrie London.
Up until this point, Jill has been moderately successful as a screenwriter. Her father's story provides the catalyst for the creation of Transparent, the ground-breaking hit show. More importantly, Jill is set upon a journey into how she really is. She transforms from being a wife defined in terms of pleasing a man into a non-binary super ambitious superstar. Jill goes from being unhappily married to a typically self-interested man one day to a passionate love with a female friend the next.
In following her desires, and the opportunities they create, there is collateral damage. Jill is giddy with new love, and her children seem to get neglected. It would be fascinating to hear their side of the story. Jill does evolve into the parent she is comfortable being, a better father than a mother. Before this happens though, she does a lot of finding herself. Jill writes about her mother having lots of affairs. Now it is her turn.
Fortunately for the reader, Jill and family are considerably nicer than the utterly disagreeable Pfefferman family in Transparent. Jill does not just promote trans issues through the show, but also through casting and the writer's room. The project threatens to unravel through the outrageous behaviour of Jeffrey Tambor, the lead actor. As the MeToo movement rises up, Tambor is shown to have been sexually agressive with other cast members.
As the book comes to a close, things are still up in the air. Jill, however, is a transformed person.