I feel like this may have been written just for me (I am sure everyone who has given this book a favourable review has said the same thing!) With wit, some academic research thrown in for good measure and some practical advise I feel this is the perfect book for those of us who love a grudge!

1 star for not finishing the book, despite liking a bit of the story - it was very funny at times. But simply not enough to pick it back up again.

Thank you for providing a copy of this book for review however I was unable to open the file for this document unfortunately! Apologies.

I used to really like Sophie Hannah's books and poetry, but this didn't quite hit the mark for me. It seemed to be trying too hard to be light-hearted, but did not really strike the right note for me.

Thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for an advance ARC copy.

As a long-term grudge holder this is exactly the book I needed to justify my approach. Full of very pleasing grudges, a means of measuring the depth of grudge and how to hold a grudge healthily - very good read.

As a grudge holder myself, this was a lighthearted read although it became a bit too monotonous for me. There was enough humour sprinkled throughout to keep me reading until the end.

2 stars

As a fan of Sophie Hannah's writing I was very interested to read this book. I can't decide whether it is really a self-help book or whether it is merely written tongue-in-cheek. Having said that it was very interesting and definitely gave me food for thought while also causing me to laugh out loud on several occasions.
It was well-written and I could almost hear Sophie's voice in the writing. Because of the subject it was a bit repetitive in places while the questions were repeated in order to score points for the grudge level to be ascertained.
It was light-hearted and I don't think it was meant to be taken too seriously. Nevertheless if it makes people handle their grudges in a more reasonable fashion and make people feel better about themselves all well and good.
There is also a series of podcasts on the same subject of which I have listened to two episodes so far which follows on from the book and is well worth listening to.
Many thanks to Netgalley/Sophie Hannah/Hodder & Stoughton for a digital copy of this title. All opinions expressed are my own.

Hilarious life advice! I absolutely loved this unique take, which justifies my own personal unforgiving approach (that everyone told me was wrong!) I feel vindicated! Always knew that my grudge-holding was helpful....! Recommend.

Unfortunately, I couldn't get in to this book and I just didn't agree with the premise that to hold a grudge can be a okay.

It seems to me that, maybe during a period of writer's block, the author sat doodling for a while and came up with this. I think it must be aimed at the Young Adult market, because as am Adult Adult I find the tone immature, silly and patronising.

She makes the argument that grudges can actually be positive experiences, identifying different types of grudges, when – indeed, if - to let go of a grudge. In fact she takes issue with the very definition of a grudge. Apparently a couple of professional mental health experts cast their eyes over this work. Who would have thought!

Using snippets from social media along with personal experience to back up her “research” she has sprinkled the book with Grudge Quizzes in order for readers to evaluate themselves. Oh please. This is the stuff of teenage magazines.

Almost didn't request this book, as surely holding a grudge is really not good for your long-term mental health? However, the title was intriguing enough to hook me, and I'm so glad! It turns out I'm a natural grudge-holder!

Sophie Hannah takes the concept of grudges and details in fabulously entertaining and witty style her method for processing grudges - not holding on to feelings of resentment and anger or desires for revenge, but reflecting on the incident in question, forgiving, learning a life lesson from it (for example, taking action to prevent the perpetrator/s from creating further grudge-worthy situations), and possibly even crafting a hilarious anecdote from it to entertain others.

I don't feel I can go the whole hog of preserving my grudges in a grudge cabinet, or even grading them, as Hannah does, but the core message of processing your grudges to neutralise their impact is the perfect nugget to take away.

I did feel the book was a little too example-heavy, and felt that the grudge-gradings could at least have been edited to the responses, rather than list all the a, b, or c answers each time (and as this was an ARC, maybe this has been done for the final published version). I also wonder whether Sophie Hannah's friends will be holding their own grudges when they recognise themselves behind the thin veil of 'names have been changed, but this is based on a true story'!

So not quite a five-star read for me, but nonetheless an engagingly written, subversive take on how to handle the thoughtless idiocy, spiteful remarks and downright outrageous injustices that others will inevitably inflict on us from time to time.

A brilliant book written by an incredible author which has learnt me a lot about grudges and how to deal with them in everyday situations!

Well worth taking a punt and reading!

Many thanks to Hodder for allowing me to read an advance copy of the book.

I really enjoyed this book. I would have to confess that it might have been written for me, because I am the sort of person who counts holding grudges as a favourite hobby, but it is a good introduction to the art for others with less experience. The author cites good academic evidence of the benefits of holding grudges, and gives clear instruction as to the best way to curate your collection. I had never considered the possibility of a grudge cabinet, so maybe I am less of an expert than I thought.
Sophie Hannah writes in a witty style, keeping you entertained, while making some serious points. She advises that you should look closely at your grudges to find what they are telling you. She gives a lovely anecdote of staying with some friends overnight, and how the husband woke her up in the middle of the night by switching her bedroom light on while looking for his dog. She says that she was able to go back to sleep because she filed away this grudge to consider when she had more time. She could think about it on her journey home and was then able to put it with other incidents involving the same person. Her conclusion was that this person is still a friend, but that she won't be accepting invitations to stay overnight in the couple's home. When looked at in this way, I can see that it tells you that this is a person who doesn't give any thought to how others feel, so the behaviour is not personal. I doubt that I would have been so calm about it, but perhaps I should work on that. I suppose the book made me consider whether I do take things to heart too much.
I found this to be a very entertaining self help book.

I picked this up on a whim because the title was so very intriguing. It sounded like the antithesis of most of the self help books that are out there. Why would anyone want to hold a grudge? Nasty, small minded, grubby things...! I finished it thinking I neede to buy a copy for just about every teenage girl I know.

This is not a book about holding onto pain or anger or ugliness. It's a book about using those things to grow as an individual, and to learn how to protect yourself from painful experiences in the future. That's so important. We all experience pain in our relationships, to a greater or lesser extent. Some people can just shrug it off, but some of us can't. We need a way to process experiences so they don't damage us. Once we've done that, it's much easier to move on. It's not possible or healthy to constantly ignore negative emotions, and it's not healthy to be perpetually consumed by them. This book gives a structured way of reflecting on things and learning from them. Oh, and it's funny, and friendly, and supportive. It's the book equivalent of coffee and cake with your most generously understanding friend.

Enjoyed this book although I was slightly puzzled by it. Prior to reading this book I had not heard of Sophie Hannah before. Although why write a book about holding a grudge Im not sure,
Thank you to both NetGalley and Hodder and Stoughton for my ARC of this book. In exchange for my honest and unbiased review.

I am a great fan of Sophie Hannah's psychological thrillers, so this departure from her normal fictional output is quite a surprise - and something of an eye-opener.

I suppose we would all like to believe we are too magnanimous to hold a grudge for long. “forgive and forget” is the noble attitude we are usually urged to take – but only saints are truly capable of this, so where does that leave the rest of us lesser mortals?
Sophie’s lighthearted treatise explains why there are times when we need to take a stand – and not feel guilty about it:-

“We shouldn’t allow other people’s inconsiderateness or even their cruelty to make us unhappy and affect our inner peace. We should simply tell ourselves that their bad behaviour is their problem, not ours."

Moreover, when you feel that you have a genuine grievance, it is psychologically healthy and advisable to stand back and analyse the situation, so that it doesn't fester at the back of your mind without resolution. Then you can decide what to do about it:-

"I’ve always wanted any present-moment meanness or poor treatment of me (or anyone else) to stop so that I can start thinking about it –because what could be more gripping, right? Is the person who did me this particular wrong dangerous, or was it a one-off? What should I think about them from now on? How should I treat them? Every time, it’s a mystery that needs to be solved, and I’m a mystery addict. (This probably explains why my day job is writing crime fiction and my hobby is reading it".

Still feeling guilty? Let this Winston Churchill quote ease your conscience:-

"Holding a grudge is a statement of our own moral code. Added to that, it increases the likelihood that we will treat ourselves with self-respect, and therefore expect and demand to be treated respectfully by others. It is a way of saying to oneself, as Winston Churchill so pithily put it, “This is the sort of bloody nonsense up with which I will not put”.

On almost a whim Sophie Hannah decides to write a book on grudges, a topic she discovers no-one else has ever written about. Holding grudges is a universal psychological phenomena and although Hannah has no mental health background or experience, she feels comfortable tackling the topic, with the help of two mental health practitioners looking over her work. She takes issue with the definition of a grudge, identifies different types and themes of grudges, and when to let go of a grudge. She makes the argument that grudges have the power to be positive experiences, transforming a person to become a better human being and clarify their personal value system. This is not a book to dip into from time to time, according to Hannah, for the arguments raised to make sense it has to read from beginning to end.

Hannah gives us personal anecdotes and evidence gained through social media as evidence of her research to back up the points that she makes. There are several multiple choice Grudge Quizes interspersed for the reader to evaluate themselves. She identifies the danger of revenge in grudge holding and the need to look at the intentions behind holding a grudge, processing it and learning from it before placing it in a Grudge Cabinet. I found Hannah's approach meandering at best, full of assumptions and questionable in its organisation/structure, and not all her anecdotes seemed to be pertinent. It is not Hannah's fault, but I am used to more academically rigorous approaches with clear goals and more structured and wider data gathering with more careful evaluation. For those who have little understanding of psychology and emotional mental health, they may well find Hannah's light hearted non-expert approach to the subject interesting and of value. There are interesting points such as celebrities who have been public in the grudges they have held, and there are countless songs and movies on the topic. From my own perspective, I have enjoyed a number of Hannah's novels, in my humble opinion, her fiction is much more successful than her foray into non-fiction here. Many thanks to Hodder and Stoughton for an ARC.

I, like numerous other readers, love Sophie Hannah's books but this was a strange one, I'm not sure how it managed to stretch to a whole novel. Sad to say I didn't finish it, I became very easily bored with the subject matter and fine details of Sophie's various grudges.