Very moving novel about two siblings - one in north England, one in New York - who receive a letter from their dying father who wants to see them after being estranged for years. It's full of memories of their parents' relationship, their alcoholic mum, the guilt of not being there for her and the resentment of having to look after her... Relationships, children... At times it reminded me of some books by Anne Tyler, the focus on family, the psychology, the details. I found it really moving, and beautifully written. I would read other novels by Haleh Agar.

Gripping read that's about friendship, love and family. It was really emotional that moved me and took me to the story.
Beautiful writing and absorbing story.

Thanks a lot to NG and the publisher for this copy.

This is a stunning first novel, set in the British town of Welton, where the focus is on Ava, and New York - where the story concentrates on Michael, Ava's estranged brother.

Agar alternates the chapters. Ava's start with her being hit by a car - the drive, a teenager called Sam, becomes a friend and helps her see through the dark days that follow, driving her to appointments, taking her to London to see her terminally ill father who hasn't been in her life for years. Ava's life in her dreary bungalow (where she has lived along since her mother was killed in a car crash on the M1 motorway the year before) was derailed even more when Sam hit her. However, it also opened up opportunities for her, namely meeting younger people - and having sex with someone which she needed and wanted.

New York chapters focus on Michael, his wife Layla and son Jacob. Seemingly, he has been cut off from the family for a long while: he didn't go to his mother's funeral and when he got married, he only gave his mother and Ava three weeks' notice. Clearly, from his early days in New York, where he went to university, things have been strained and this doesn't resolve quickly.

Agar deals with the complexities of family relationships here but also temptation - such as when Michael has a one-night stand with Sarah, a British artist who is staying in the apartment opposite his - and Ava sleeping with Sam, over 10 years her junior. But Out of Touch is about so much more: the decisions we are forced to make; the long-running implications of our actions; not knowing what we want or how to get it. This is a human story for our modern times and Agar is very adept at transplanting readers into the lives of the two siblings: they're thousands of miles apart but dealing with the same things at the same time.

I loved Out of Touch - I hope you do, too.

Ava and her brother Michael are opposites and out of touch; both received an unexpected and unwelcome letter from their estranged father saying he is dying and would like to meet up with them. What follows is the woven tale of who they are now, their lives, sometimes ordinary, sometimes messy with interjections of their painful pasts.
What I liked was how the author introduced and developed the characters, how their inner thoughts sometimes conflicted with their reactions to situations as well as interspersed suggestions of theirs being a dysfunctional upbringing.
I also liked the theme of addressing conflict within a family, of being a parent versus one's own upbringing and whether there is a place for forgiveness; however, I felt the storyline was disjointed and as it jumped from one event to another I was left asking how some of these trivial observations and side stories enhanced the storyline, character development and flow.

Out of Touch by Haleh Agah is an eloquently written look at family dynamics, and how individual family members address both physical and emotional pain within a dysfunctional family. The story begins with a bang as we find Ava lying on the ground after being hit by a car. She had been distracted by a letter she had received from her estranged father who wanted to reconnect with her. The book alternates between Ava’s story, and that of her estranged brother Michael, who had similarly received a letter.

Both siblings have been affected by events that took place in their childhoods, and although they both perceive their childhoods as having been different to one another, the reality is that their experiences were very similar. Ava feels that her life has been taken away from her as she was expected to look after her mother from an early age, and finds herself still stuck in the same rut months after her mother’s untimely death. Michael spends his time worrying about his marriage and his role as parent to his son Jacob, because he does not want to repeat the same mistakes that his father made in raising him.

Receiving similar letters from their dying father prompt both siblings to review their own lives, with the assistance of people who enter their lives along the way. I particularly warmed to the friendship that Ava began with Sam, the younger man who hit her with his car, and the way in which he looked out for her and helped as much as she would allow him to do. Although both siblings were reluctant to renew their relationships with their father, they found that opening up to the possibilities made changes to their lives in many ways.

This book was both moving and challenging for me, because I found myself empathising with the siblings, but also struggled to understand some of the choices they made along the way. Seeing them learn from their mistakes rounded the story off perfectly for me, and I found that I really enjoyed the journey this book took me on.

It’s difficult to believe that this beautiful novel is, in fact, a debut novel. It feels like the work of a highly accomplished author. It’s so well written, with a style of prose that’s almost lyrical in quality.

It’s also very readable, however, with authentic characters and fabulous descriptive passages.

The rich and multi-layered story alternates between both Ava and Michael’s stories, both so different, but also with so much in common.

The characters are human and flawed, but there’s still something eminently likeable about them. Ava is quite complex, and a bit quirky, and I particularly liked Michael.

This is a wonderful story about families and the dynamics between them. It feels so real. It’s a book that will stay with me for quite a while. Highly recommended.

A beautiful and intense family portrait described by multiple facets.

I loved the descriptive writing style of the author as I could see myself catapulted into the lives of the two main characters,Michael and Ava.
All the different nuances of love,betrayal,loss and family bonds are represented in such a vivid yet touching way and I was completely absorbed by this brilliant story.
When it comes to family,the dynamics and the relationships are often so complicated; Haleh has been able to portray them in a simple yet authentic way.

A powerful and gripping debut.Bravo!

Thanks to Haleh Agar and to W&NBook & Orion Books for the ARC of this book in exchange of my honest opinion.

This is a family drama novel. It tells the story of a brother and sister and the relationship with their parents.
This book is well paced and excellently written. It is emotionally engaging and shows the complexities of families and relationships.
A great read.

A sister. A brother. A father. A letter.
If there are as many families are there are m&ms in their factories, Out of Touch drew me in instantly by the sheer force of its authentic, painful, and constantly-evolving take on relationships.
Let’s rewind a little.

Haleh Agar wins the best first encounter with a main protagonist. When we meet Ava, she’s on the ground, having just been hit by a car. Yet, this is not a dark and grisly scene with body parts bent at weird angles and blood everywhere. No, it’s a painful but weirdly odd and fun – and absolutely genius – key moment in Ava’s life that marks the beginning of something the reader can’t fully understand yet…

Michael, on the other side of the Atlantic, is in a room full of people who wants to share their stories. If he appeared detached from the crowd, his attendance to those events where strangers talk about their life and its issues told me that consciously or not, Michael was looking for answers. My feeling was reinforced when he walked back home to his wife and little son.

Ava and Michael’s lives are polar opposite in appearance, but both siblings have more in common than they think. Their different ways of trying to cope with what childhood left them gave me a clear understanding of their personalities and the author made sure I could relate to parts of their stories, connect to their doubts and feelings, and most of all, care for them.

Unhappiness is a natural part of being alive.

A letter from their father is the big ripple that comes to disturb their days. It is clear that Ava and Michael have suffered from the absence of their dad and a rocky growing-up with their mother. I think only a lucky few can honestly say they’ve had the best childhood, no matter how much our parents have loved us. Haleh Agar’s family tale rings so true that anyone can connect to the story. Laced with a sharp wit and the intricate ways of love, Out of Touch felt familiar throughout, as if it was made of tiny bits from all of us in the world. Crazy but so true, and even more powerful for it.

It comforted him, how dysfunctional the families were in most of the myths: fathers eating their children, children slaying their parents and mothers throwing their sons down mountaintops.


Do you forgive? Do you forget? Can you move on? Parenthood is no easy path and parents are flawed. Children learn and make mistakes, no matter their age. Is there a right way to mend family bonds?
Ava, Michael, and their father haven’t seen each other in years. How do you cross the frail bridge built by a letter?
We are not talking about a ‘hey, how are you?’ missive. No, their father Lee has sent a bomb. He is dying, and he wants to see his children. My personal experience had me conflicted at this, and I love the way the author has handled Ava and Michael’s reactions. A last chance at being a family triggers choices, reopens wounds, and ultimately puts everyone in an uncomfortable seat. In this novel, no one is perfect, but in the end, they all need a nudge to reach the next step in their life. I loved watching them face the shadows of their past. Not everything gets tied up nicely, because nothing in family ever gets this chance. However, with a magnificent sensitivity, Haleh Agar paints an eloquent family portrait.

OUT OF TOUCH By Haleh Agar

(Note to readers: there are details from the novel mentioned in this review but (hopefully) no plot spoilers!)


Out of Touch by Haleh Agar is a soulful story about two siblings, Ava and Michael, and the ways in which they try to make sense of their family's past.

Michael lives in New York. Ava, England. And as their current lives unfold we are given glimpses of the way things were between their parents when Ava and Michael were growing up.

Towards the end of the novel, their father, Lee asks 'What do good families do?'  and it is this uncertainty, this search for a happier future to eclipse a tricky history which seems to fuel both brother and sister in their daily lives.

Earlier in the story, a request is sent by Lee to see both his adult children urgently. As readers we are intrigued to discover how this part of the tale will develop.

The scenes in New York where Michael lives with his partner and son are vividly told, 'everything in mason jars' and with a straightforward realism which is compelling and enjoyable to read.

And the appearance of an artist neighbour who is able to see into Michael's apartment adds an interesting dimension - a twist on the idea of the male gaze - for as she watches him and his young family go about their daily life, it is the female gaze making Michael conscious of his actions, affecting the choices that he makes.

Out of Touch is well paced and yet there is a captivating stillness to its prose, an acute sensuality reminding me of the film, 'Yes', by Sally Potter which also looks at shattered family dynamics and cultural crossings.

The international angle is delightfully told, not just through the dual scenes set in the U.S and UK but via the backgrounds of the characters themselves -- Lebanese, Greek Cypriot and Iranian. Culturally-specific details add texture to our understanding of the main characters and a liveliness to their histories.

There is much depth portrayed in this novel but also a pleasing lightness to the writer's style which makes it a book which is hard to put down (I read it in two sittings and I'm generally not a fast reader!)

It was refreshing to read how the twin taboos of physical and emotional pain are tackled and the myriad ways in which humans try to face or avoid them.

When something frightening happens to shake Michael and his partner's family life in New York, his partner Layla responds by becoming overly cautious, taking a hammer on car journeys in case of an accident, deciding to try to become the 'God' of the family by checking everything she can. Layla's anxiety which seems to stem from a disconnection from the nominal faith of her childhood is insightfully handled through the narrative.

While the difficult legacy of Michael and Ava's mother, Elena, is portrayed in detail there is also space for complexity in our understanding of her. And it is this grappling with the dynamics of family and the way characters try to overcome their histories through new choices that this book is at its most captivating. We are given a window not only into the pain of the past but also the ways in which repair may occur in the present.

The love story at the centre of the novel plays out beautifully. Sam is earnest and believable, Ava wavering and confused until she has to make a decision either way.

There is something warm and life-affirming and ultimately important about the way human difficulties are addressed in this book. I was left at the end with the sense, as a reader, of being seen. The existential questions the characters face - whether it's possible to make peace with the past (can old disagreements be mended?) and why a look at what happened long ago might shed light on our present responses - feel universal and timely.

I look forward to reading more from Haleh Agar.





Please note - I am currently reviewing selected books whose launches have been affected by the current Corona virus outbreak. If you are an author or publisher please feel free to get in touch (via the contact page on my blog, Muscat tales, below) if this is of interest.

So this book tells the story of Ava and Michael siblings who grew up with unconventional and often warring parents. As adults they are estranged from each other and from their father. There mother having died recently. Their father gets in contact when he discovers he is dying and wants to see them.
I felt like the story was a bit disjointed. Ava has her life and her story and Michael has his life and his story and it didn’t particularly flow for me. I would have liked to have had more from them as a family and less of the sideline stories which took up too much space for me.
I have given it 3 ⭐️ ⭐️⭐️

Out of Touch by Haleh Agar is a very perceptive novel about family dysfunction, conflict and resolution.

Stunning writing that so eloquently explores nuances of families, conflict and love.
I felt a strong attachment to Ava, being a carer is a difficult role and she lost a lot of her own identity with everything that happened. Seeing her steps forward and the way she was able to develop a deeper understanding of her parents and move to a place of acceptance as well as emancipation was rewarding to read.
I felt I bonded with Michael less and certainly at times he's very unlikeable but I understood why he was closed off and what his actions truly were shielding.
The years of miscommunication, avoidance, fear and shame have scarred this family in a complex system of barriers, selfishness, cowardliness and martyrdom, is it possible to ever forgive and find a way forward?

Moving and absorbing, a story that highlights the vulnerability of friendship, family and love. An excellent read.