I was really excited to read this after reading Lot, and it didn't disappoint. I especially liked the sections of the book that followed Benson, but I really appreciated the subtle shift in writing style between the two characters perspectives.

Memorial is the story of Mike and Benson’s relationship and about their separate lives. They have lived together and loved one another for a few years, but when Mike gets word that his estranged father is dying back in Japan, it seems to come at the right time for their relationship. They clearly need the space to think. Except “frying pan” and “fire” comes to mind. Benson is left to live with Mike’s mother who has come to visit her son, and Mike is propelled in to caring for a dying man, a stranger to him, and running his bar.
It was so interesting to read about their lives and motivations. What starts out to be a purely selfish move by Mike (I felt that he was running away at first), actually becomes a selfless act. Of course, there is the advantage that he gets to know his father before his death, but he is there for him until the end.
Even though Mike’s childhood was much harder, it’s Benson who, to me, seemed to have been more affected by his parents break up. His father’s alcoholism, his mother leaving them and starting a new family, and his HIV+ diagnosis, all added up to a difficult mental space for him. But I didn’t feel that any of this became sentimental. It’s a joint decision when Benson and Mike realise that their relationship is coming to an end.

I really enjoyed this book. Its gentle pace where small acts and occurrences form the bigger picture really appealed to me. It’s an original and engrossing story from an author that I’ll be looking out for in the future.

Many thanks to Atlantic books for providing me with a copy of this book through NetGalley.

Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for review.
A quietly emotional story about points of view and the power of what's not said rather than what is.

I'm perplexed by the reviews of this book, clearly it just wasn't for me. I persevered but I found it strange and difficult to read. It was "all over the place", there was no depth to the relationships and it seemed very mixed up. I spent a lot of time thinking about other books I could be reading and how I felt two days were wasted on this. Not for me. #netgalley #memorial

Ben and Mike have been living together for several years, but their relationship seems to be floundering.- they never really tell each other how they are feeling, or tackle their differences. When Mike discovers his estranged father is dying back in Japan, he decides to fly over to be with him, at the same time as his mother Mitsuko, flies to the US and arrives at their apartment to visit. She and Ben make an odd couple but eventually bond, while Mike reaches a new understanding with the father he had always thought abandoned him. Will there be a way forward for Mike and Ben, or have they just moved too far apart?
This moving, insightful and often very funny novel was a joy to read. The characters, even minor ones, are memorable and skilfully drawn. The author’s style is quite spare but conveys a lot of meaning and depth. He is very thoughtful about families and heritage, how the past affects our present and our future, and how our parents are as human and fallible as we are ourselves.. Definitely one to watch.

And here it is, nice and early this year, my first five star read of 2021. To be honest I am not all that surprised I loved this book. I highlighted it as one of the books I wanted to read this year and it’s a book by an author whose collection of short stories “Lot” won the Dylan Thomas Prize and which I rated four stars, acknowledging the potential.
This debut novel is even better. It is the story of a male couple, Benson, who is black and Mike of Japanese heritage living in Houston. Their relationship is somewhat rocky and not helped by Mike’s mother arriving from Tokyo for an extended stay on the same day Mike flies to Osaka to connect with the dying father who had deserted the family. We get two first-person narratives from Benson, sandwiched between is Mike’s experiences in Japan.
Benson is left to forge a relationship with a woman he has never met as they bond over cooking, attempting to find common ground as they share the apartment whilst Mike helps out at his father’s bar, which is his potential inheritance. The couple’s relationship is tested.
I was drawn in by these characters and their families. I found children’s day-care worker Benson was especially vividly drawn, Mike seems more elusive which makes some of his actions questionable (including the desertion of his mother which is central to the plot). It is less spikey than the short-story collection and provoked a real emotional response from me. It feels modern, is well-written and has provided an early reading highlight for 2021.

This is a beautiful, understated novel about family ties, love and nourishment.

The two POVs are so strong. Both Benson and Mike felt so real, and so justified in their actions when we understood these from their own POV. When we first read about Mike leaving when his mum is just arriving this doesn't seem very cool. He seems like a pretty big jerk. But then, the POV switches and we see that for Mike this was the only choice he could make.

When a character cooks for another this becomes a gesture of companionship and acceptance. The food nourishes the relationships as well as the bodies.

Somehow avoiding sentimentality but still hugely moving in its portrayal of life, death and relationships I think this novel will stay with me. I would read more from this author. My thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.

By another writer, commissioned for January print feature in The Skinny:

"In Memorial, Bryan Washington’s debut novel, relationships are explored in all their many shades, coloured by their ups and downs. He is not interested in depicting a life of clean, neat order. Instead, he looks to unpack the "creases in-between certain relationships", whether it's fractured father-son dynamics, love nearing its end, or the relationships we have with home cities and the memories they carry of former lives we have lived. All is fair game in this powerful debut."

Full feature: https://www.theskinny.co.uk/books/features/bryan-washington-memorial-interview

Bryan Washington's story collection “Lot” imaginatively delved into the fictional lives of a variety of characters in Houston. He movingly portrayed the numerous conflicts and strong bonds to be found amongst families, friends and neighbourhoods as well as many different ethnic and socio-economic groups. His debut novel “Memorial” is a kind of extended story you might have found in that collection but concentrates on couple Benson and Mike whose relationship is severely tested when Mike leaves their home in Houston to reconnect with his estranged dying father in Osaka. Although they alternately narrate this novel we also get glimpses into the lives of their families, neighbours and the larger community so there's a wonderful kind of plurality to Washington's narrative. This is also one of the most complex and honest portrayals of a modern-day gay relationship I've ever read. Although there is a strong emotional and sexual bond, this story lays out much of the ambiguity and uncertainty that exists between them. These elements can be found in many relationships, but there are specific challenges which African-American Benson and Japanese-American Mike face being a same-sex couple. Washington shows how these elements of their identities certainly don't define them but have a persistent impact on how they interact with the world and each other.

It felt really true the way Benson and Mike never really define their relationship. From meeting on an app and a mutual acquaintance to living together to Ben being in the strange position of co-habiting with Mike's mother when he leaves, the state of their connection is uncertain and fragile. Neither is particularly good at communicating how he feels so these unwieldy emotions are primarily expressed in fights and sex. Is this an extended hookup? A loving affair? A marriage by another name? Roommates with benefits? The reader is never entirely certain because Benson and Mike aren't certain. I've been in relationships like this and know lots of gay couples that live in this state of uncertainty.

I think the variables involved are due in part from them both being obstinate men who don't want to commit one way or the other, but also because gay relationships aren't given the same credence as heterosexual relationships in their families and community. This is an effect of both external and internalized homophobia. When we meet them their respective families fully accept their sexuality, but it wasn't always so and the painful rejection Benson experienced when he admitted to his family that he's not only gay but HIV+ is still intensely felt. Details of these factors are gradually revealed as pieces of the story are recounted by both men. It makes the moments of silence or unemotional communication between them all the more meaningful.

One of the powerful ways Washington represents this is in a series of photos of their respective urban environments Benson and Mike message each other. We get the context of when both men are sending and receiving these images so understand their respective positions and abiding desire for a connection but it doesn't make it clear how their relationship will go forward. It says a great deal without using any language. This tension is movingly sustained over the course of the novel as both of their lives are evocatively brought to life with the details of their day to day interactions in Houston and Osaka.

I really appreciated the way the author represents the perspectives and voices of many different people in his story, but I felt the dialogue didn't always ring true. There are certain turns of phrase which are used by a number of characters. It'd be understandable if it was just Benson and Mike who speak the same way, but both Mike's separated parents and a man who works in Mike's father Eiju's bar in Japan use similar expressions at different points. This would occasionally take me out of a story I otherwise wholly believed.

Overall, I admired how this novel let its tale gradually unfold in many low-key scenes involving cooking or working or waving to neighbours. It's stated at one point how “The big moments are never big when they're actually fucking happening.” “Memorial” shows how some of the most dramatic decisions in our life often aren't ever definitively settled but result from circumstance and a resounding ambiguity about which direction we want our lives to go and who we want to be with.

Memorial is a complex and intricate novel about identity, family and reflections on love. Benson and Mike are in a relationship but they have reached a crossroads. Their feelings are complex, and their relationship fraught with tensions. Mike returns to Osaka to spend time with his dying father, just as his mother, Mitsuko, comes to Houston to visit. Never having met her before, Benson and her are awkward around one another, but they slowly build a relationship based around cooking.

Both men meet someone else, and when Mike's father dies, leaving him his business, Mike has to decide whether he stays with Benson, or starts a new life in Osaka. Meanwhile, Mitsuko is the real hero of this story as she imparts her wisdom to the two men who mean the most to her.

Moving and engrossing, this was a beautifully written and original story.

I picked up 'Memorial' over Christmas intending to read a few pages over my morning coffee before starting the day. Before I knew it, it was 2pm. I was still in my dressing gown, the cats hadn't been fed, the bins hadn't been emptied. That's how compelling it is.
Initially, I wasn't sure what to make of this book. The blurb is at risk of making it sound a bit schmaltzy where there's lots of hugging and learning. But while there's some hugging and rather a lot of learning, this is anything but saccharine. Instead, it's a beautifully written portrait of two complicated people trying to figure out what they want from the world, their families, their lives and their relationship together. You can see that they deeply love each other, but they're not quite sure how to make the pieces fit any longer. I particularly enjoyed how Bryan Washington wrote about food and sex - two things whose descriptions can often be terrible when put into print, but here, sing with life and racy joy.
It's not perfect. I felt that the character of Ximena seemed to speak solely in mic-dropping platitudes and I wish there had been more to her than just providing the right thing to say at the right time. But otherwise, this is a masterclass in restraint. The restraint of emotion, the restraints of love, the restraints of family and familial expectations. What a joy of a read and the perfect thing to kick off 2021.

On paper, this book’s set up feels like the most unlikely situation – yet as Terry Pratchett famously wrote, million-to-one chances crop up nine times out of ten. This is precisely the sort of ridiculous scenario that people do find themselves having to deal with: in this case Benson, a Black nursery teacher and his boyfriend Mike, a Japanese-American chef, are avoiding discussing their dwindling relationship when Mike decides to travel to Japan to say goodbye to his estranged, dying father. Unfortunately for Benson, Mike’s Japanese mother, Mitsuko, has literally arrived in Texas for a visit a few hours before Mike decides to leave for the other side of the world. After days of silence, Benson and Mitsuko slowly become unlikely roommates: connecting in ways they could not have foreseen – while in Japan, Mike discovers the truth about his parents and by extension, himself. Once the anger and hurt subsides, there’s a lot of love in these characters’ worlds: they just might have been looking for connection in the wrong places.

Featured in Book Club | Cambridge Edition January 2021

Having heard Bryan Washington speak, it's refreshing to read this. It's easy and accessible, with no airs about it. It sort of reminds me of Charles Bukowski and his direct way of writing. There was nothing to keep me going. I also had read the short story in the New Yorker, which is excellent. These two characters are some of the most fleshed out characters I've ever read. And what is certainly notable, is when it switches narrators, it's almost as if it's written by someone different. It's actually remarkable.

In terms of the story, it's great to see people of colour who are gay and not defined by just that. The have real lives. I liked Mitsuko the most. But liked all of them more or less at different times.

It largely deals with the damage that is orchestrated by our parents and society. Entirely readable and believable, but besides good characters and writing, the plot didn't propel me at all to finish. But in a way, that's sort of the point.

When Mike finds out that his father is dying, he decides to visit Japan on the same day that his mother arrives for a visit. Mike's boyfriend, Benson, forms an unlikely bond with Mike's mother.

This is a complex and multi-layered book featuring themes of race, sexuality, family, alcoholism, the realities of being in a relationship, HIV positive status, and many other things. There is also a switch of POV around the halfway mark as we are no longer following Benson but follow Mike instead.

I enjoyable seeing both sides of Mike and Benson's relationship and get a really deep look into their backgrounds.

I did not completely connect with the characters in this book but feel as though I have gained further perspective.

Firstly, the representation of gay men I found so refreshing to read about. Especially when both of them come from such different backgrounds and faced different struggles. Mike is Japanese and Benson is black and HIV Positive. The author gave them a lot of depth and told us everything about them, flaws and all. The relationship between Mike and Benson comes across very troubled and this follows them on their separate paths to then make a decision about their futures.

The style of writing however I really struggled getting into. This is a personal view as its nothing to do with the author being a bad writer, let me assure you of that. The layout of the paragraphs didn’t flow for me and there were no speech marks. I had this problem when I read Normal People by Sally Rooney. At times I was unsure who was speaking or if it was somebody’s thought or not. Maybe its just me?! Also the ending was left quite open and I really hoped to have some kind of definite conclusion.

I can see why many readers will love this book, the author is most definitely a talent who writes very raw and realistic novels. But due to the ending and the narrative being something I couldn’t get on with.

One of my favourite reads of 2020 - Washington writes with a tenderness about family and relationships that is hard to beat.

Ben & Mike are an interracial gay couple who probably shouldn’t be together. When we meet them, Mike’s mother has just arrived from Tokyo to spend time with him but he’s getting ready to fly to Japan to be with his dying father. The resentment & confusion that Ben feels at being left with Mike’s mother who is a stranger to him at that point kick starts a poignant look into what has led both men to this crux in their relationship with each other.

They both carry a lot of family trauma which they unknowingly bring into their relationship with each other & while I loved reading how their individual stories were folding out while Mike was in Japan, reading their interactions with each other was hard because of how real it felt. There were so many things that were unsaid between them and the things that were said seemed to be full of dislike & resentment. I wondered if they had initially got carried away with the idea of each other, rushed into things & then stayed together out of convenience rather than something more important.

It’s without any doubt that Washington is a brilliant writer. A lack of speech marks doesn’t work for everyone but for me, in this particular novel, it felt like all distractions were stripped away and it was just Ben & then Mike telling me their versions of the story. It added authenticity to a novel that already felt real because of Washington’s acute characterisation of both Ben and Mike. It is not the ‘cleanest’ of novels in terms of its detailed descriptions of sexual scenes however I think this adds to the intimacy that Washington brings to his writing. Washington has done a great job at encapsulating how little things can add up to the point where we wake up one day and wonder, ‘how did we get here?’

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book - the blunt writing style may not be for everyone but it is for me! The lack of punctuation was a bit challenging at first but is easy to slip into, and I think it really contributed to the themes of familiarity and relationships which the novel explores.
This book is beautifully paced, with a slow lilt to it that fits perfectly the frustration of the relationships it presents. The main characters, Ben and Mike, as well as secondary characters such as Mitsuko, Eiju and even young Ahmad are well-rounded and perceptively considered.
The book heartbreakingly explores ideas of interiority and the home, allowing the characters to come to terms with their imperfect relationships, both romantic and familial. It is an intimate, frustrating read that ends almost mid-story, allowing the characters the space to work through the things they cannot say, but still feel strongly.

Perfectly paced, exquisitely written, a beautiful, frustrating, moving book about interiority, and what we feel isn't always reflected in how we speak or act. Incredibly moving about the intangibility of 'home', and perceptive in the way it considers race, class and sex, painting a vivid portrait of America today through two quiet lives. Fans of Sally Rooney will enjoy the interiority and uncertainty of the characters, whilst the spareness of the writing has echoes of Ocean Vuong. I loved the way Washington handles the perspectives of both Benson and Mike separately, with separate sections dedicated to both characters but not interspersed, just as in Lauren Groff's Fates and Furies. A really wonderful novel.

I enjoyed the simplicity of the story and the subtlety in which Washington writes about a normal relationship. The bond between Mike and Ben is certainly not without fault but I enjoyed the points of view from both characters. However, I felt we were told a more about Mike’s character and background than I could gather from Ben’s, possibly down to Mitsuko’s presence in both of their lives. Ben’s experiences seemed much more hollow as his friendship with Ximena and sibling relationship with Lydia are only touched upon. I found my focus on Eiju and Mike overwhelming the rest of the plot and ultimately, a lot of the gravity is surrounding Mike.

As a general preference I find it difficult to read conversation as it is written in Memorial (without punctuation) and although I got quickly used to Ben and Mike’s tones of voice, it becomes much more difficult when introducing secondary characters.

The end of the book was just what I wanted for them both and Washington does a great job of leaving the reader with Athena ability to imagine their outcome. Overall, Memorial shows that a book doesn’t need drama and action or a huge pivotal turning point to be effective as escapism but I felt the experiences of the protagonists should have been more evenly spread - not in pages but in depth.