Not the type of book I was expecting going in... Thought there'd be lots of humour and self-deprecation. Instead, it read like veiled abuse and I spent most of the book under a constant cloud of anxiety because how else could no one even see this was not 'normal' ?

All The Tw*ts I Met Along The Way tells Carolyn Hobdey’s tales from her teenage years until her 40's of awful boyfriends, sickening sexual encounters, manipulative men, love triangles, affairs, unsupportive and unsupported medical diagnoses of early menopause. From porn-addicted boyfriends who turn from fit into owners of ‘dad bods,’ to her husband being in a car crash and having a boob job.

Eventually when she does marry, it become as marriage to a man who is more like a brother (and who came out eventually as gay after their 15-year relationship). Later on there is a relationship with a man and his ‘ready-made family’ that exposes a case of coercive control and narcissism.

This book reads more like a novel rather than a memoir. It's certainly an interesting read and quite an eye-opener with regards to her final relationship - I could see what type of personality he had before she even declared it. It's a brave read of her dealing with the relationships, juggling her HR job and family commitments.

I didn't like the bits where she referred back to herself as a child trying to be good - it seemed unnecessary, though I understand it's point as she doesn't feel good enough. There are lots of use of brackets during the memoir, which always drives me round the bend when I see it in print.

Also I'm not sure if the published version has this - I had an ARC - but the epilogue is after the author's note. If I'd not read the note then I would have missed it altogether.

I received this book from Netgalley in return for an honest review.

I have never wanted to scream at a book so much in my life! A no holds barred memoir which chronicles Carolyn's relationships.

The book was a real page turner, I thought the conversational style of the writing was perfect for her story. A good mix of humour and some really serious, heavy moments made for a good balance. I am sure the writing process as cathartic and Carolyn probably looked with different eyes at each situation she documented, but I fully understand how, at the time, things can seem so very different.

This is recommended for fans of Bridget Jones - this book is definitely the bigger, grittier sister but I really enjoyed it... if that's the right word?

TW - eating disorders, infertility, rape, coercive control, emotional abuse, suicidal ideation

This book was sent to me as an ARC on NetGalley. However all opinions are of my own.
The blurb says you’ll enjoy this book if you like Bridget Jones.. if you haven’t seen it, like me, then you can only imagine her life to be full of life long tragedies. I’m not necessarily a bit fan of humour in a book but I thought this was the perfect balance. It also shows vulnerability within certain relationships.
TW for narcissistic behaviour.

A real page turner, I couldn’t put it down.
What a journey and thank you for demonstrating that it is possible to rewrite your internal story and use your energy to create a new future from a place of self awareness and determination.

Carolyn Hobdey has written a no holds barred memoir, with possibly the best title for a memoir ever? 😂 Her aim is to show that even those who are successful and seem like they have it together, may be struggling with their own demons.

From a young age she was always told that she was the problem, that if only she was nice then good things would happen. As she grows older she encounters men who treat her terribly, and because she always thinks it's her fault, this leads to quite a dark and manipulative relationship.

I liked how conversational it was too, it felt like when your best mate tells you literally everything about their life - the writing is very stream of consciousness. Because of this, there's a lot of information about changing relationships, jobs, houses etc but I feel like it's done to build up to the end, to show that people don't always recognise when emotional abuse is taking place. It is by no means an easy read and there are a fair few trigger warnings (listed at the end of the review). It also doesn't always necessarily paint the author in a good light - nevertheless this was an engaging, honest and brutal read.

[TW: eating disorders, rape, coercive control, emotional abuse, infertility, suicidal thoughts]

Huge thanks to Helen at Literally PR for sending me an advance proof copy and offering me a space on the tour for this cracking book. "All The Twats I Met Along The Way" is the first in a planned trilogy from the wonderfully inspiring Carolyn Hobdey. It's part memoir, part motivational with a hefty dose of humour and a whole lot of empathy.

Hobdey is clear from the outset that the overriding theme of the book concerns the ways in which advice received in childhood can set the template for life. In this case, young Carolyn was told she had to be nicer in order to be loved and accepted. That's quite the burden to put on anyone's shoulders and obviously carries some sinister undertones. The first impact we see this have on her life comes via her first boyfriend, who turns out to be quite the Jekyll and Hyde character.

There is a common thread of disastrous relationships running through the book. I applaud Carolyn's bravery in being so honest about her experiences. My biggest take away is that she illustrates very well how easy it is to fall prey to coercive control, particularly as a younger woman. Hobdey shows us coercive control in action, via anecdotal evidence from her own experience. The importance of this cannot be overstated given recent legislation and the (still widespread) confusion as to what it looks like. I was pleased that she chose to talk specifically about coercive control and narcissism at the end of the book. Hobdey hopes to redefine our understanding of victimhood and I feel strongly that this is long overdue. If this book can open that dialogue, then what an enormous achievement that would be on its own!

Hobdey has experienced some major health concerns throughout her life and I'm grateful that she shows the shockingly reductive way women are often spoken to by supposed mental health professionals, and doctors in general. She also articulates the disdain held for anyone who questions treatment, or wishes to research alternatives, and I would like to extend my thanks to Carolyn for pointing out that this is a coping mechanism! Her account also raises long overdue questions about the efficacy of women's health services in general.

I don't really want to give spoilers but there are themes in the book which are undoubtedly more commonplace than public discourse would have us believe. Women don't often open up about porn-addicted partners (how can guys watch with their mates? So gross!), or men who enter into heterosexual marriage then come out as gay further down the line, through misplaced shame and embarrassment. Yes, those men need support too but this is Carolyn's space so my concern lies solely with her at this time.

Overall Hobdey sets out her stall with honesty and integrity and provides the foundation upon which her trilogy shall be built. There's a lot of hurt and heartbreak but Carolyn has approached every hand she's been dealt with humour and grace. I got the sense of this book being a sort of purge and I hope that, now it's out in the world, it frees Carolyn up to concentrate on her other work going forward. I'm looking forward to her next instalment and wish Carolyn every success and happiness in life. She's a warrior.

This book was a bit heavier than I was expecting, however, once I started, I couldn’t stop reading. Carolyn’s way of storytelling is raw, honest, and unflinching, something that is rare in female written memoirs, at least in my reading experience.
She lays it all out: finding out at 32 that she can’t have children because she has in fact already gone through menopause; after being married to a man for 15 years, she discovers he’s gay; throwing herself into work when her home life is not what she wants it to be; finding what she feels is as an actual partner, but it turns into trying to appease a narcissistic man. Hobdey bares her truth in a way I wish we all could.
I recommend reading this book if you have the chance:
“Because twats are, after all, everywhere.”

The title of this book says it all and drew me in with a chuckle. I just knew after reading the title and then reading the synopsis of the book describing all of the horrible dates, attempting to live up to parents' expectations, and references to "...Bridget Jones, but you want something with a bit more grit". Carolyn Hobdey did an excellent job sticking to all of the above and more.

Goodness, when the book began my heart just went out to the author from the start with the pressures of not being nice enough for her parents' approval, the boyfriends she encountered, and the marriage she describes. I clamped my hand over my mouth on several occasions when she describes all that she endured on horrible dates and with horrible boyfriends. I found it to be a poignant account of all that Carolyn had been through to write and tell us exactly how she felt in each moment. I mostly found a kinship with her during her fertility struggles and within her descriptions of her HR career. I, too have had fertility struggles and am currently meandering my way through an HR career. So, being able to laugh and cry right along with her were touching moments within the book.

Even with all of that sadness, love, and grit, I found myself cheering her on with each page and delighting in her success within her career and starting her own business. To me, this novel was more about discussing all of the tw*ts of the world, which had to be done, but of the power of lifting yourself above it and working with what you have. I really enjoyed the book and am again so thankful for the opportunity to have read it.

Honest and heartbreaking and real. I’m not a big non-fiction reader. Reading this was more like having a heart to heart with a friend. It was no holds bar look at your friends life. The author didn’t sugar coat anything even when it didn’t show her in the best light. For some the title might be off putting. Don’t let it. This is an important story that needs to be shared to shake the stigma Trigger warning of emotional abuse.

Thank you NetGalley for giving me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I absolutely love the simplicity of this cover! The colors are perfect together.

I love the title too. I mean I honestly am more likely to purchase a book that has a ballsy and eyecatching title and cover. Let's be real.

The book is unique. Truly. The author has a fabulous way with words that keeps you wanting to read more.

Overall, I'd definitely read more books by this author.

This is a gripping book which highlights the relationships of Carolyn Hobdey and her journey of how she was a woman who was struggling, to a someone who is able to see the toxicity in her life and ultimately is able to help others in their own journeys.

Of course there are times when you can clearly see that she makes mistakes, but somehow her decisions of how she corrects them is interesting but also inspiring. To not only identify what was wrong in the relationships she had, whether that be the toxicity of the workplace, or at home, it is admirable how she opens up a dialogue to the reader, to show that you are not alone and you are not going mad.

You can tell that she has a strong character due to her tenacity to achieve the most out of work, but also be able to stand up when she really needed to. In fact, it was truly terrifying at points that I thought that maybe she wouldn't come through. But she didn't disappoint. In fact, if I remember correctly, towards the end I had some kind of pride of how she was able to conquer her problems and fears. It truly is an admirable quality.

I think this is book which should be small bible to those who have some inkling that something isn't quite right in their life. All I can say to family and friends who know someone who might be going through a similar ordeal themselves, it might be time to put this book on their gift list.

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me a copy to review.

This actually sounded like a brilliant biography but I just couldn't for the life of me get into it, I simply wasn't all that enamored with the writing style, and this just wasn't my type of read despite the fabulous title which initially drew me in!

Wow! This book! I love the title more than anything in the world!

A super success in business gal can't make a right choice for her private life to save her life. She continually chooses the wrong partner time and time again. Her husband ends up coming out gay after they divorce, which explains a lot after the revelation. Starts dating a rebound guy only to find a guy with a ready made family. Conception has been an edgy topic for her in the past. Things with the new man start off great, work. is great, his kids love her -- then it all turns... He starts "settling in" and showing his true colors, they move, spend all her money, and she does everything around the house and for the kids. She wakes up, finds out there is someone else and eventually moves on..

It is heartbreaking story about love, loss and success and how it's not all its cracked up to be.

It's not easy being honest about relationships to ourselves let alone to put it into words and go through your history. I admire Carolyn for doing so and no doubt her story will help other women feel less stupid and alone in their own choices. Especially those who have been mistreated by men and felt like it was their fault.

As much as I couldn't put this book down, I did find the the writing and narrative timelines quite messy but attributed it to being an early copy. Hopefully it will be edited to a better standard.

This is one of my favorites! What a wonderful funny storyteller this author is! I definitely recommend this book.

This wasn’t quite what I was expecting, , it was a lot darker than I expected, it wasn’t very engaging and I was put off by the writing style which I just couldn’t get along with. Not for me at all.

Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for a free copy for an honest opinion

Reading the opening of this book I felt I was really going to relate- l’ve been there, rubbish relationships and situations you can’t quite believe you went through.
The tone of this book was fantastic, like a conversation with a friend. There were parts of the book where I found myself questioning Carolyn’s choices and felt she wasn’t taking much accountability for her own actions but as the book progressed I could see why this was. I realised at no point in this is she asking for sympathy- just sharing an experience lived and survived.
There is a very clear message in this book about doing what you can to protect yourself and that abuse comes in many forms.
Although work and career is a common thread throughout this book I would have liked a little more on how the author’s company came about and how her life had changed from that point.
I’m sure this book will help a lot of people who are finding themselves in similar situations and I hope it is a great success

Do you consider yourself to be living your life in a similar way to Bridget Jones or have so many obstacles to overcome in life that you get tired of it all? If so, Carolyn Hobdey is here to tell you that you are not alone and that things won't be that way forever. Written in a down to earth, brutally honest and highly amusing manner, it covers many trials and tribulations in life that most us will be able to relate to, and that's what makes this book stand out when compared to books of a similar nature. It helps us understand that this whole messy thing we call life is not straightforward for anyone regardless of their age, gender, race, class, or any other distinguishing features.

All The Tw*ts I Met Along The Way tells the tales of crappy boyfriends, sickening sexual encounters, manipulative men, love triangles, unsupportive and unsupported medical diagnoses… From porn-addicted boyfriends to car crashes and boob jobs. Marriage to a lover who became more like a brother (and who had been hiding his homosexuality throughout their 15-year relationship) and later a relationship with a man and his ‘ready-made family’ that exposes a damaging case of coercive control and narcissism. Carolyn’s story exposes the unrelenting pull of the child-parent relationship – even in adulthood – and all the messiness, self-esteem issues and confusion that can cause in life.

It talks in a refreshingly candid way about heartbreak, adulting, domestic abuse, premature menopause, childlessness, and personal tragedies. What it teaches us ultimately is that it's okay to feel a mess and to feel sad, depressed and lonely but things change and through resilience and laughing rather than crying you'll get through it. After all, it doesn't matter how many times you fall, what matters is that you get back up, dust yourself off and say a mighty F you to your problems. An inspiring, frank and utterly original read that I cannot recommend highly enough.

I was initially drawn to this book expecting it to be at least slightly humorous and light hearted - it's not.

Hobdey has a terrible writing style - incredibly stilted and lacking any sort of flow. Perhaps a ghostwriter would have been able to make this a more interesting read?

Initially I felt a rush of sympathy for the author, due to her experiences growing up amongst her unsympathetic family as well as her awful relationships as a young woman. However, this was lost when she repeatedly has affairs and blames her betrayals on her husband. Eventually, he makes a revelation which explains her frustration and unhappiness, but it still does not excuse her horrendous behaviour as well as the flippant way she is boastful of it. This is also seen in her relationship with Connor who she treats terribly (despite ample opportunities to end the relationship, she stays with him for 7 years until he is no longer useful to her). Her behaviour in these relationships is cruel and manipulative - the men both behave terribly too to be clear - yet she repeatedly views herself as a victim. She doesn't take any responsibility for her own actions and comes across as a thoroughly selfish individal in this section of the book.

I did, once again, feel sympathy when she discusses her relationship with Simon. The experience shows just how easy it is to end up in an abusive relationship without realising what is happening and also how difficult it can be to get out, even when you have a good support network. I was disappointed by the ending of the book as it was extremely rushed. It would have been interesting to have a few pages detailing what has happened since and it would also have been a perfect opportunity to mention help available for those in abusive relationships.

Overall - very slow, poor writing style, rushed ending and the author doesn't seem to be a particularly nice person. I can't recommend.

Thanks to Filament Publishing and NetGalley for the ARC.