To write a review about this book seems wrong. It feels as if I am intruding on someone else’s life experience and diminishing it by giving my opinion. However, I will try to do justice to this remarkable author and hope that I can show the effect her storytelling had on me.
This is a powerful novel which invokes, in me, feelings of intense sadness for all the characters. Nancy Tucker has amazing insight and an understanding way beyond her years. I never read books more than once but I will certainly read The First Day of Spring again as I think it has a lot more to teach me.
Thank you Netgalley and Random House UK for giving me the opportunity to read this book and especially Nancy Tucker for sharing her talent.

This gripped me from the very first sentence "I killed a little boy today". This was definitely going to be a dark thriller read. It was not an easy read but i loved it! I couldn't put it down!

This was an excellent, if a quite disturbing read.

Chrissie's/Julia's character was really well written and made me go from disliking her to feeling really sorry for her. Reading about the awfulness of her home life, you can understand why she ended up doing what she did.

I liked the split storyline between Chrissie (past) and Julia (present).

Thank you to PH, NetGalley and Nancy Tucker for the chance to read this book.

ive just spent about five days with Chrissie and Julia. Chrissie is eight years old and lives in abject poverty. She is neglected by her mammy, there is no food in the cupboards, and no love in the house. Her Da turns up every now and then, Chrissie believes that he dies and then comes back from the dead. The only time Chrissie gets to eat is at school, or hanging around her friends homes at tea time. All Chrissie wants is for someone to know that she is there, and that she matters, she wants to be noticed. She wants her Mammy to care...then Chrissie does something terrible to get noticed.
Julia is a twenty five year old Woman struggling with the demons of her past, a mentally Ill mother, and parenthood. 'You have to care about things to want to keep them'...
A harrowing tale with fantastic characters, a story of neglect, mental illness, and a little girl looking to be loved.

When a book begins with the sentence "I killed a little boy today" you know that you are not going to be in for a light read & Nancy Tucker's The First Day of Spring" is certainly not that. It is however, a moving & heart breaking story of Chrissie. When she was eight she killed a two year old & it made her feel powerful- goodness knows it was a feeling she didn't usually feel. Her mother totally neglected her. Chrissie was lucky if she could find a bag of sugar to ease her stomach pains! Her father appears & disappears, showing little care or responsibility although she thinks he cares. Chrissie has no filters- never having been taught the way to behave by example or direction. The story is told by Chrissie & also by Julia- the identity she was given after many years in a secure unit. She now has a small daughter & is terrified that she will not be able to be a good mum & care & protect Molly.

This was a book that tore at the emotions. My heart went out to this poor little girl who had endured such treatment but I was left with the belief that she could break the chain of poor parenting- I really hope so. Thanks to Netgalley & the publisher for letting me read & review this moving book.

Why would a child commit a terrible crime?

This was such an incredibly powerful novel and so unexpected if it's pretty ubiquitous title is anything to go by. It tells the story of eight-year-old Chrissie and her mum, and later when Chrissie is a woman named Julia with her own daughter, Molly.

Nancy Tucker builds up such strong emotions towards all of the characters; I felt intense anger in relation to Chrissie's behaviour yet I was heartbroken for her in equal measures. Chrissie's mum brought about feelings of dislike and outrage as well as distress for the angst and mental health troubles she was facing. While all of this is going on the friendship between Chrissie and her best friend, Linda grows and holds. This is a scintillating, extremely dark read from start to finish and it's a truly outstanding début, the author adeptly holding you captive throughout. Emotive and breathtakingly good.

I read The First Day of Spring in staves with other Pigeonholers as part of a group. A special thank you to Random House, Nancy Tucker, NetGalley and The Pigeonhole for a complimentary copy of this novel at my request. This review is my unbiased opinion.

4.5 STARS

"So that was all it took," I thought. "That was all it took for me to feel like I had all the power in the world. One morning, one moment, one yellow-haired boy. It wasn't so much after all."

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Dark and deeply disturbing, THE FIRST DAY OF SPRING tells the story of Chrissie, a girl with a secret. One that involves her killing a boy.

I experienced a lot of cogitative dissonance when reading this one. Chrissie's actions in the story were unthinkable - maybe even unforgivable. However, it was obvious to me that her actions were not done out of malice but from a place of desperately craving to control something in her life. To feel powerful and important, because she was treated like anything but at home. It was a cry for help that no one chose to answer.

THE FIRST DAY OF SPRING is an exploration of the "why" behind the worst crime a human can commit, while also asking the reader to question whether or not they deserve a second chance.

Thank you so much to #tandemcollectiveuk, the author and publisher for my #gifted review copy.

Nancy Tucker has to be applauded for taking a difficult subject, handling it with such skill and writing such an amazing book - it is hard to believe it is her debut novel.

This book handles some hard-hitting issues and is not an easy read - you are thrown straight in when in the opening chapter eight year old Chrissie kills another child. The book alternates between eight year old Chrissie and an adult Chrissie, now with a new identity as Julia., struggling to build a new life and look after her own daughter. Tucker's skill lies in creating an incredible character in Chrissie - neglected and desperate for attention, at times seeing the work in the naive way you expect from an eight year old, at other times showing an anger and frustration no one that age should feel. Whilst the reader never forgets the horror of the act she has committed, your heart breaks for her as she grows up in an environment no child should ever have to experience - though sadly I suspect it is a very real situation for more children than you would like to believe.

It is a book that makes you think, takes you on an emotional rollercoaster and is absorbing from beginning to end - it is certainly one I won't forget in a hurry.

“I killed a little boy today.”
When your book begins with this sentence, you know you have a dark journey ahead of you. After you have completed your double-take at that unexpected start, you try to get a clearer idea of the diabolical person giving you this first-person insight. The killer murdered the child willingly. Then walked out calmly in search of her friend, went to the local park and played with her until the murder was discovered. She calmly joined the crowd and watched the distraught mother sobbing over her dead child.
What the heck is happening, you wonder… And soon the shocking detail is revealed.
The killer is an eight year girl named Chrissie. And in her narrative come tumbling out dark secrets and devastating revelations that leave you speechless.

In addition to Chrissie’s voice, the book also comes to us from the pov of Julia. Julia, who is in her late twenties, and mother to five year old Molly. Julia is constantly worried about providing a secure and loving home to her daughter, especially as she is a single mother. She doesn’t want to allow her past issues or lack of familial support to affect Molly’s life. But when she realises that there is someone waiting to take Molly away from her, she feels terrified and compelled to take a drastic action.
Julia is Chrissie, about 15-20 years later, under a new name and with a state-sponsored job for rehabilitated criminals.

When you discover a young child to be a killer, you wonder what kind of sick, twisted, weird book you have picked up. But will you be able to keep it aside? No way! I'm simultaneously horrified and awestruck as the story went on to reveal more and more of Chrissie’s shenanigans. Many of her thoughts and actions seem precocious for a typical eight year old. Then again, she's not a typical eight year old in any sense of the word. Nor is she blessed with the family environment that would help put her on right track. She’s a pathological liar, a thief, and a bully. She is also ignored by her parents, shunned by most of the neighbourhood children, insulted by her teachers, and perennially hungry. You feel torn between wanting to castigate her and feeling sorry for her.
At the same time, you also have to reconcile yourself to the fact that this same child has grown up to be Julia. And you wonder, should a child murderer be allowed to have a child? For how long should a crime be punished? What would you do if your child was murdered and you hear about the killer free and with a child after a few years? Don’t killers deserve a second chance? Do they? Too many questions, no simple answers.
It's very tough to reconcile yourself with the fact that both these voices belong the same person. The dominant emotions in Chrissie's story are anger and aggression while in Julia's story, fear and insecurity reign supreme. It does seem unrealistic at times to see such a turnaround in a character. What makes it even more difficult to accept is that you are seeing both the voices simultaneously and alternately. So the constant change between seeing a dangerous Chrissie and a timid Julia takes time to put your head around.

Nancy Tucker has written a couple of non-fiction memoirs detailing her struggles with mental health issues. This is her first full-length fictional work and she uses her experience and education in experimental psychology to full advantage. She keeps the narrative compelling and the pace pretty fast. Her writing is simply brilliant; I was left zapped by the powerful emotions. And for the same reason, I couldn’t read this book at one stretch because Chrissie drained me out emotionally. After ages have I read a novel that was disturbing and heart-breaking at the same time.

The book isn’t flawless. There should have been a little more information provided about Chrissie’s family life. We know her Mom and Dad don’t want her but we never know why. We know they don’t stay together but there’s no reason revealed. Having some kind of a situational background would have helped us. (Then again, the narrative is from an 8 year old child’s perspective. So if she doesn’t know why her parents don’t stay together, we wouldn’t know either. So I suppose this is more of my wishful thinking than a writing fallacy.) My bigger grouse is with the ending. How I wish it were braver! Then again, debut work. Whatever she did with it was brave enough.

Overall, this is a book where the character stays in your head and messes with it big-time. This is one heck of a fictional debut and I would love to read more by this author. If you want to read a book with a messed-up lead character trying hard to make amends, this is the book for you. But remember, it’s very intense on the emotions and there are many triggering scenes. You will be left breathless and agitated. Caveat emptor!

Thank you, NetGalley and Cornerstone, for the ARC of the book in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you to Netgalley, Random House UK, Cornerstone and Nancy Tucker for this e-copy in return for my honest review. Having read the blurb for this book, I knew I would love it. Having read it, I can say that it's absolutely superb. From the chilling opening lines, this book got under my skin. It's spine-tinglingly good. It would be impossible not to feel sympathy for little Chrissie, who so desperately wanted to be loved and was so deeply misunderstood. She will definitely stay with me for a long time.

WOW! This book!
I knew from the moment I read the blurb I was going to enjoy this book. What I didn't factor was just how much It blew me away. As a debut novel it's exceptional. I was extremely impressed with the strong character development. The plot was gripping and the whole story was emotionally compelling.

As a reader was given so much to think about. Thank you Nancy for blessing us with your talents. I would not hesitate to recommend this book and will for sure cannot wait to read more from this author.

Thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for this review copy.

This is one of those books that burrows under your skin and remains there forever. It is a truly spectacular and daring take on a question that has been asked time and time again: nature or nurture? It is impossible to answer with any certainty but The First Day of Spring digs deep into the morality and complexity of the issue with a great deal of nuance and sensitivity. The story follows Chrissie, a neglected eight year old who kills a little boy. We follow her in the immediate aftermath and also fifteen years later, as she lives under the protection of a new identity and has a young daughter that she is terrified will be taken from her.

I do feel I have to make clear – this is a harrowing and often deeply upsetting book, it is not an easy or light read but it is also incredibly powerful and so worth reading. Tucker’s willingness to take this subject and really explore the shades of grey within it in such an unflinching yet still somehow respectful manner is remarkable. The horror of what Chrissie does is never undermined, however I defy anyone to read to the end of this book without feeling a sense of compassion for her. I found The First Day of Spring one of the most emotionally gruelling books I’ve read – I felt such heart wrenching sadness with regards to the neglect and abuse she suffers. The fact that there are children out there like Chrissie broke me – this is a work of fiction but it is an undeniable truth that there are millions of children in the world living in poverty, neglect and a complete lack of support and love. There are no easy answers in this story, it is a book that puts you through the wringer and demands discussion and I really couldn’t recommend it any more highly if I tried. It is definitely one of my books of 2021 and is also now up there with my all time favourites. PLEASE read this book – you won’t regret it! An easy five stars from me!

Brilliantly written with the raw emotion of a mother trying very hard to survive, this is good, keeps you turning those pages all night. What did she do as a child, when will people find out what happened and will she have to give up her daughter because of what happened in the past. Is she really bad? I loved this story, it was a bit different even shocking in places but well worth reading, another best seller? It could well be.

Well, what a book this was!! I loved it! Less of a thriller and more of a, well, I'm not really sure what it is to be honest! I guess it's a thought provoking, dark and twisted story about what it takes to make a child a killer and what happens to them after the fact, once they are released back into the real world.

Chrissie, age 8, is our main character and features in the story as both a child and an adult. Although her child character does some truly awful, unforgivable things, I found it hard to really dislike her as the story goes on. At times I even found her matter of fact speech and no filter comments to both other children and adults quite amusing.

But there are things she does that are really hard to read and there's no denying that she deserves a punishment.

The adult voice of Chrissie, Julia now she has been renamed and starting a new life, was an interesting perspective. She has a child of her own now and it does make you think about whether people deserve a fresh start when they've committed an awful crime and how they themselves begin to move on.

This one won't be for everyone but if the synopsis grabs you then go for it because it's brilliantly written, the ending had me in tears which I was not expecting at all!

'I killed a little boy today'

The opening line to this fantastic book...how could you not read further?

Chrissie is 8 years old, and has committed this most terrible of crimes, and this is clear cut...what is not immediately clear cut is why, but author Nancy Tucker describes eloquently the background of Chrissie's life. Then it raises questions...is it ever forgivable to take a life, how long do you repay for and is it ever truly repaid...
I loved the questions it raised, and the way Tucker doesnt at any point attempt to answer them...its all left in your imagination which surely is the purpose of a good work of fiction.
Excellent build up of Chrissie's character too, so I cant really do anything other than say well done to the author on her debut novel, and give it a 5* rating. Many thanks to Netgalley.co.uk, the publisher and author for the chance to read an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

A very interesting read, quite a dark storyline but told with sensitivity, took me 24 hours to read as couldn't put it down

Told in a dual timeline The First Day of Spring tells the story of Chrissie, a child murderer and Julia the same person with a new identity after serving her time in a secure children's home.
Chrissie's home life is hard. Her mother can't cope and her father is in and out of prison. Julia has a young daughter and has to follow her own strict timetable in order for her to cope.
This is not an easy read. The life that the young Chrissie lives is harrowing and her outcome seems inevitable. When people read of child aged murderers they always think that they must know right from wrong and are just bad. In this book we learn that her father's frequent absences and returns lead Chrissie to think that people die and come back to life.
I devoured this book in a couple of days, wanting to know what happens next.

Eight-year-old Chrissie is a child-killer. She is pleased with her effort – it gives that fizzy, sherbet-like feeling in the depths of her stomach. She can hardly contain herself from telling others that it was her, but, being a neglected and unloved little girl and the poorest from a already very poor housing estate, she has a strong sense of self-preservation, so she keeps her secret to herself. Not to mention that she doesn’t really understand death – her da had been declared “dead” by her ma on a few occasions but always managed to come back. But Steven, the toddler Chrissie throttled, seems unable to rise from the dead and his death endures to Chrissie’s bemusement. Twenty years later, Chrissie has a new identity as Julie and a daughter of her own. She believes that she is undeserving of motherhood, and fears that her child will be taken away from her. Julie picks up where Chrissie has left off and embarks on a journey of re-discovery and cautious redemption. The narrative oscillates between Chrissie’s and Julie’s stories which complement each other perfectly.
This is a harrowing read, but one I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend to anyone, whatever your reading preferences. It has a lasting resonance, a heart and a soul, and most of all - conscience. Chrissie’s voice is captured brilliantly. The little girl’s loneliness, despair, her everyday struggle for survival and love are heart-wrenching. Her anger is palpable. Each of her life’s raw disappointments hit me hard as an adult and member of the society that has made this child into what she is. Despite the bleak and gory subject there is a message of hope in this book: people aren’t born evil and they certainly don’t have to remain so. All it takes is for someone to care.
Other characters are also wonderfully observed and drawn: Chrissie’s inept mother, Chrissie’s best friend, the sister of the boy Chrissie’s has killed, Chrissie’s absentee-father… The commentary on our society is damning, but not the commentary on our humanity.

I loved this book and the messages it held. The emotions that racked through me as I read about Chrissie were so intense and made me rethink so many previous thoughts based on how I had perceived the world. I wanted to scream at her mother and despite all that she did I just wanted to cuddle Chrissie. This is a tough read as Nancy does not hold back on the terrible descriptions of what Chrissie endures or does.
I did not want to put it down and highly recommend this to all readers.

I had a really hard time connecting with this book. There was never really any description of the main characters made, outside of hair length , ages and body weight. I couldn't quite create a mental picture to work from.
The narrative jumps between Chrissie as a child and Julia as an adult, but no mention of the era it was taking place in. This was another incident of me having to fend for myself with mental image.
The book was not what I expected. I enjoy a good "Bad Seed" story usually filled with suspense and thrills. This one just made me sad. Clearly, Chrissie's motivation to kill and bully are from her years of neglect and lack of proper parenting. After the first kill I knew exactly where the story was going.

Unfortunately this story didn't give me the thrills I was hoping for,and was a lot of work to actually follow.