Padraig-Acton gave the psychology/self-help world a remarkable gift of empathy, understanding and direction in his book Learning How To Leave. The case studies, quotes, and chapter themes provided a helpful backdrop upon which to better contrast normative behavior from NPD. I highly recommend this book to anyone who desires to grow in awareness concerning this all-to-common blind spot many people have of detecting narcissism. I plan to return to this book over and again for refreshers. The quote from page 213 that I include below is perhaps the most profound paragraph I've read all year. Brene Brown should book a podcast with Michael Padraig Acton today! Two great minds.

The table of contents at the beginning of the book would have been improved with page numbers; also, there were a few minor punctuation issues.

Two favourite quotes:
"First, Robert was so afraid of being alone and unloved that he preferred to cling to the illusion of love and future happiness rather than examine the facts with his usual cold eye of logic" (p. 121)

"Codependency can be partly understood as a disease of self-loathing. I see all the time in my work that by focusing all of their being on serving other people, codependents deny themselves the full light of awareness. They try to nourish themselves from the reflected light of other people's appreciation and gratitude but the presence of self-hate, lurking in the background, leads to a constant, gnawing self-doubt. They sometimes see their own self-disgust lurking behind the smiles of those they are attempting to please and they obsessively work harder to be a better partner, employee, child or parent" (p. 213).

Narcissists thrive on isolating their ‘victim’, cutting them off from the life they could be living, and making them so dependent that they feel unable to survive outside of the toxic relationship. This book challenges the reader to refuse to accept the toxic life any longer. To choose a worthier existence. Because we all live the lives we accept for ourselves.

“A narcissist is only done with you when they’re done. For those in a relationship with a narcissist, the most powerful step you can take now is to learn how to leave.” – Michael Padraig-Acton.

Michael Padraig-Acton’s 30+ years experience in psychological therapy and counselling, plus incredible case studies and insights from leading experts, are packed into this accessible, hard-to-put-down guide that will empower codependents – and those who care for them – to understand and identify why and how they need to step away from toxic narcissistic relationships forever… and how to heal. Tackling domestic abuse, domestic violence, addiction, coercive control and more, Learning How To Leave explores myriad narcissistic relationships (romantic, family, work etc).
Love a self help book and this was a solid ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ read!

The author explained clearly what narcissism and codependency are. He has helped me understand the development of the dynamic between the two so much more. The lists of books for further reading are very helpful.

Excellent ,Informative and accessible .
What so many of us need when dealing with this situation.

Review will be on my blog for publication date .

Not usually big on self help books but this one struck a cord. An interesting analysis with some frank advice

I am an abuse Survivor and also work as an advocate so I have read many books on the subject; particularly on Narcissistic abuse as my abuser had NPD, but this was one of the most informative books I have read on the topic.

There is so much information but it is all explained so clearly. I love that it's not just focused on the abuser but also on the victim as well. It felt like I was reading about my life and my thoughts and emotions when going through this.

I highly recommend this as compulsory reading to anyone, not just victims. I think the information within is very important for everyone to know so they can avoid finding themselves in a similar situation or maybe be more aware of why that person in your life won't leave their abuser.