For all books involving mental health and triggering topics, a safe mindset is crucial for your reading experience to be healthy and fun. I read this is two parts. Within the first part i hadn’t been taking the warnings seriously, leaving myself feeling not great and heavily impacted by the seriousness of the topics. So i decided i’d finish the book when i was feeling better! Which is exactly what i did and i’m so glad because it is an insightful portrayal of how toxic relationships manifest and affect mental health. Once i got back into it, i finished in a night.

Some highlights for me were the representation and open conversations regarding real issues of our time, and seeing into the mindset of someone going through a toxic friendship living through the motions of how anxiety makes our thoughts irrational and illogical but still feel frighteningly real. I could relate to so much but still have questions. It was an interesting read that gave me motivation to learn more about psychological factors that play into relationships. Getting to see how others words affirm our fears and turn our own minds against us was really eye opening.

I highly recommend giving this a read! (definitely take content warnings seriously)

Some friendships are an illusion. You get drawn in by the mystery of a person and then you think they are great and you want to be a cool friend and do everything together.
This is not always the case some can become toxic and unkind people will push you as far as they can regardless of how you feel.
Llewella is learning that not all friendships are cracked up to be and not everyone is nice.

A great read, i could not put this down.

As the parent of a teenage girl, I found Toxic disturbing. Poor Llewella has self esteem issues that new girl Aretha ruthlessly exploits out of jealousy. It's wonderfully written and the author clearly remembers what it was like to be a teenager herself. I loved the Welshness in the books. It's been a long time since I heard the words nain and taid. My nain got me through my difficult teenage years single-handedly. I recommend this book to anyone with friendship group issues and everyone who feels that they aren't enough.

Llewella or Loo was a naturally bright 17 year old with a passion for writing and drama. She also suffered from anxiety and was receiving counselling for it. She worried she didn’t have a ‘best friend’ but by default found herself pairing up with Olivia, another student not one to follow the crowd. Both girls had auditioned for the school play and on the first day of term had just discovered they had been given the parts they wanted.
Loo was also on the student council and had the aim of changing the school’s crest from one which advocated ‘Meekness and Obedience’ in girls to one more suited to 21st century life and ambition for those girls.
In the first assembly of the year a new student was introduced – Aretha, and Loo was mesmerised by her confidence and determined to introduce herself to Aretha. This was made easier by the fact that the two were the only non-white students in the whole school.
Loo had started a blog years previously to become an outlet for her writing and also her anxiety, focussing on reviewing toilets in public spaces – restaurants or cinemas, and had amassed a healthy following and also bank balance as companies contributed for favourable reviews.
As a friendship between the two girls developed Aretha proposed expanding this to more general lifestyle including nutrition which she claimed to know about. She started to suggest Loo eat less and more healthily to lose weight.
As Loo invested more time and money into doing whatever Aretha suggested her world expanded, but so did her anxiety. Other people noticed the change in Loo and pointed out it wasn’t always for the best.
Could Loo extricate herself from what was becoming very much a one-sided friendship?

Toxic is a YA novel about a 17 year old girl called Loo who has an anxiety disorder. She runs her own blog where she reviews public toilets as dirty ones make her anxious. At school she meets the enigmatic Aretha who encourages her to take a new direction with the blog. This is an interesting look at how manipulative teenagers can be. Aretha claims her personality traits come from mental illness and that Loo is causing problems by not going along with what she says. I think its important when things like 'be kind' are so heavily emphasised in the media that there is an honest conversation about how badly some people can behave and blame it on their mental health. I thought this was an excellent read.

Toxic was a great book that featured a toxic friendship and how it can be damaging. The writing was engaging and the plot shared valuable messages. Overall this was a great read and I would recommend it!

Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the free e-arc!

Llewella has straight-A grades, a lead in the school play, a prefect badge, a successful blog and a comfortable life. Despite this, she feels like a brown, chubby square peg at a school full of thin, white girls. She's never had a best friend. Could the new student at sixth form - glamorous, streetwise Aretha - be the one? Llewella and Aretha get tight, quick. Before long, Llewella is following a diet Aretha has designed for her and has abandoned her own passions to dive headfirst into Aretha's world. She’s determined to be the most loyal, greatest friend she can be, even when Aretha says and does things which make her feel the opposite of great. Even when the anxiety disorder she thought was cured starts to re-emerge. Isn't that how friendships work?

‘Toxic’ by Natasha Devon makes me so glad I’m not a teenager anymore. Girls can be super mean and I wouldn’t like to be a teenager growing up amidst today’s toxicity. Life seemed so much simpler when I was a teenager. I was drawn to this book for several reasons. I have a teenage daughter and therefore I was curious to take a look into a world that I left behind a long time ago. Furthermore, I love books in which toxic relationships are a theme, yet another one of my guilty reading pleasures. And it was thoroughly enjoyable. Marketed towards young adults, it’s an accessible read for anyone of any age and I will definitely be buying a copy for my daughter when it is released.

I would recommend this to everyone who enjoys a good read and especially those who have teenage daughters - a wonderful insight into the social dilemas and peer pressures facing our kids in the world today.

My thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for providing an arc in exchange for an unbiased review.

This was one of those books I just couldn’t stop reading. I devoured it in two days, even reading until 5am because I just had to finish it.

This book tells the story of Llewella and her new friend, Aretha. And right from the start, we can see that Aretha is a toxic, manipulative friend. I love stories that look at twisted relationships, and I think this is now one of my favourite books about manipulative and toxic female friendships (my other favourite is Genuine Fraud by E. Lockhart).

The friendship portrayed in Toxic is so one-sided, and so many times I just wanted to scream at Llewella to get away from Aretha.

Llewella has anxiety and panic attacks. Aretha pretends she’s good with these, but she’s not. She undermines Llewella’s mental health struggles constantly, and then she herself claims to have bipolar, referring to it as a ‘real’ disorder—oh and she isn’t diagnosed and won’t see a doctor. My jaw hit the floor here. It seems Aretha uses her self-diagnosis as a way to excuse what a horrible person she’s being. She emotionally abused Llewella constantly and it’s so obvious to readers. I was screaming inside as I read this. I don’t think I’ve ever hated a character as much as I hate Aretha. she calls Llewella fat and gives her a meal plan. Llewella spirals into eating disorder territory because of this, but it’s Aretha doing her a favour, ‘improving’ her. Aretha takes over the blog that Llewella started and then makes her start a new brand with her. Llewella’s money goes into it, of course. Aretha wants Llewella to be dependent on her, but then she abandons her at several points, one time in London zone 1, despite Aretha having panic attacks.

Aretha makes it clear she thinks mental illness is a conspiracy, that it’s something that means the person isn’t strong or resilient. She uses Llewella’s anxiety against her, so when we do get Aretha saying she thinks she is bipolar, that was immensely interesting. Because, she could have bipolar disorder. But still that doesn’t excuse her treatment of her supposed best friend.

The mental illness rep is phenomenal. Aretha makes it clear she thinks mental illness is a conspiracy, that it’s something that means the person isn’t strong or resilient (she also is fatphobic and claims a character with PCOS is plus-sized because of lack of discipline and illnesses can’t cause it—Llewella tackles her on this, but of course Aretha turns it around so Llewella is wrong). She uses Llewella’s anxiety against her, so when we do get Aretha saying she thinks she is bipolar, that was immensely interesting. Because, she could have bipolar disorder. But still that doesn’t excuse her treatment of her supposed best friend. And she’s a horrible person. At the start of the book, Llewella is happy, a straight A* student, has an important part in a play, and has a blog and other friends. Not too long after she’s friends with Aretha, Llewella is unhappy, her grades are dropping, she’s got an eating disorder, her panic attacks worsen, she’s in therapy, she gives up the play (as Aretha says she’s got to prioritise), loses her other friends, and she basically loses who she is.

Half the time, Aretha is suddenly annoyed with Llewella for no apparent reason, making Llewella’s anxiety much worse. And it amazed me how whenever Aretha was mean to Llewella and Llewella tackled her about it, Aretha turned it round. Seconds later, Llewella was justifying Aretha’s reaction and blaming herself. Classic gaslighting.

This is the kind of relationship you see in abusive romantic relationships, and those are covered in books a lot. But this is the first time I’ve seen it done in friendship. And we need this book.

This book also tackles racial issues. Both Aretha and Llewella are mixed race, and one example is Aretha is annoyed that Llewella gets a TV opportunity that she doesn’t. She blames it on Llewella being lighter skinned than she is, and tells Llewella to turn the opportunity. Even though it’s what Llewella really wants, and she gets the opportunity because of the blog that she started, two years before she even met Aretha. It appeared to me that Aretha felt entitled to getting the TV role and when Llewella got it instead, she blamed it on racial prejudice. And yes, there could be those reasons in it too, but for me (though I acknowledge I am a white reader), Llewella clearly deserved it. It was her blog. She had done the work. And Aretha clearly didn’t want Llewella to succeed. So while this book does shine a light on the important issue of racial discrimination, it largely does this while also emphasising the toxic character that Aretha was. But there are Black characters, such as Steph, who also encourage readers to think about race and privilege, and this is done in an unproblematic way—though of course Aretha hates Steph, disagreeing with everything she says, until she can then say the same things to attack Llewella.

I really liked how Llewella has a supportive network of women (and her grandfather) around her. These women give her the strength to end the brand with Aretha and gain back some of her happiness.

Huge thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC. This is highly recommending reading and I think it should actually be compulsory reading for teenagers in schools.

Llewella and Aretha get tight, quick. Before long, Llewella is following a diet Aretha has designed for her and has abandoned her own passions to dive headfirst into Aretha's world. She’s determined to be the most loyal, greatest friend she can be, even when Aretha says and does things which make her feel the opposite of great. Even when the anxiety disorder she thought was cured starts to re-emerge. Isn't that how friendships work? The writing is superb and enthralling and overall, I just loved this book Very thought provoking too!

I really enjoyed this book, the characters were engaging and relatable especially Llewella and the writing style was good. I think the story premise is on ethat a lot of teens will find relatable as well. I reas this in one setting, I couldn't put it down.