If You Still Recognise Me by Cynthia So is a heart-warming and beautifully layered story that blends fandom, identity, and family dynamics. I particularly enjoyed the way it weaves multigenerational and queer narratives, highlighting the experiences of both younger and older LGBTQ+ characters. The relationships, especially between different generations, feel authentic and add depth to the story, showing how identity and acceptance evolve across time. With its relatable characters and tender exploration of love, friendship, and cultural heritage, this book offers a refreshing, nuanced look at queer stories from multiple generations. A beautiful five star read and I can't wait to read Cynthia So's next novel.

This was the epitome of a "slow and gentle" sapphic romance. I enjoyed the way the main characters reconnected after so long and I really liked seeing Elsie gain confidence in her identity. Just a very sweet, heart-warming read.

A beautiful tale of finding your true identity and falling in love.

Cynthia's writing is so touching and heartfelt, you really are on the journey along with each character. it is so easy to get lost in each small sub plot.

A Massive Thank You to the Author, the Publisher and NetGalley for giving me the chance to read and review this book prior to its release date.

I don’t know where to start with this review. I’ve been asking myself this since I first read the book nearly a year ago and I’m not getting any closer to an answer. So, I guess I should just start? I loved If You Still Recognise Me. It is one of the best books I read last year and I implore you to pick this up, especially if you’re familiar with my tastes and know yours are similar, because this book could not be more up my alley if it tried.

This book was everything that I love in YA contemporary: a coming of age story exploring the complexities of family, friendship and first love, alongside an equal balance of lighthearted teen fun and touching moments. I related a lot to Elsie, our main character, and really loved watching her come into herself as the novel progressed. She’s introverted and struggles to make friends but lives for a graphic novel series and its fandom. I adored the emphasis placed on online friendships as, honestly, I don’t know where I’d be without mine.

I particularly adored Joan, our love interest. She is a butch lesbian who until very recently had been living in Hong Kong and I just loved the way she spoke about her experience with sexuality and gender expression in this context. I fell completely head over heels for her which is very rare for me in books—she was just that good. On that note, I really enjoyed reading about Elsie’s experience with being queer and Chinese too—what that meant for her and what it meant for her family. There were some incredibly touching moments along this plotline and it was overall just incredible.

Much of the above was written shortly after finishing the book and I’ll admit that, at this point, I don’t remember it well enough to write much more (perhaps one day I’ll reread and try again to do this book justice in my review) so I’ll leave you with this: read this book. Please. If you enjoy Alice Oseman’s friendships, mental health focus and British setting or if you enjoy Ciara Smyth’s useless lesbians not admitting their Very Obvious feelings for each other and teen hijinks or if you just want to feel warm and loved for a few hours, then this is the book for you. I firmly believe that this book deserves to be the next big thing in queer YA and I hope its upcoming US release will help get it there, or, at the very least, into the hands of the readers who need it most. It’s like Heartstopper but sapphic, what’s not to love?

A beautiful read - so great to see representation like this, I wish there had been more books like this when I was a teenager - highly recommend!

Wow! What an amazing book!!
Would love to read more from the author.
Thankyou netgalley for the Arc!

"As I leave the room, I try very hard to believe that my
mum will always love me unconditionally, an exercise
that I've made myself do repeatedly ever since I realised
I was queer, and in this moment it seems just a little less
impossible than it ever had before."

i’ve abandoned my arc shelves for too long and i’m so, so glad i dived into if you still recognise me tonight—i finished it in all of about 3 hours because once i started, it was almost impossible to stop! this was such an easy read for all the right reasons; cynthia so is an absolutely incredible writer and they capture the essence of young queerness so eloquently. i never found myself to be one for ya contemporary novels but something about this book just felt like home, from the discussions of identity and gender to the experiences of toxic relationships and even fandoms/writing fanfic—it was somehow an amalgamation of all my experiences as a teenager, especially in the way cynthia explores feelings of love and expression in the face of an unaccepting world or ‘conventional’ environment. elsie is adorable, relatable and you just can’t help but want the best for her. i think cynthia has created a warm space for young people within the LGBTQIA+ community, especially POC, to feel comfortable and recognised and they’ve done it very well. their story is homey but doesn’t shy away from the difficulties of the queer experience and how different it is for all of us, and despite said difficulty, how beautiful it can be, too!

if you want to drool over descriptions of home cooked meals and cry over the bitter sweetness of teenage love, please please please consider buying this book!!

thank you netgalley and the publisher for this arc!

Really enjoyed this overall so had to get myself a physical copy! Definitely great for fans of Heartstopper!

This was the sweetest story!! 🥹 I had sooooooo many feelings and I’ve hardly thought of anything else since I finished. There are so many words I could use to describe it — heartbreaking, heartwarming, inspiring. It was a celebration of what makes us unique, as well as presenting a coming of age experience we can all relate to in some form.

I adored how the book revolved around fandoms!! I’ve been a part of various fandoms over the years. Hours spent enthusiastically posting comments on fanfiction, writing my own fics, and immersing myself into the world of my favourite fictional characters with people who love them just as much as I do. It’s such a wonderful thing to be a part of, so to see it represented in mainstream fiction was exciting and fun! Internet fandoms can bring so much comfort to people, especially lonely teens who feel as if they don’t belong in the world. It gives them a place to explore themselves safely and realise they belong in the world, and that it’s okay to be quirky and like things others don’t care for.

This was such a sweet story as Elsie (the protagonist) finished high school and navigated the summer before she headed off to uni. She longed to meet her online friend, Ava, who she secretly had a crush on, and also dealt with the return of her childhood best friend Joan. I loved the little mystery of Elsie trying to find Theresa and reunite her with Ava’s grandmother.

If You Still Recognise Me isn’t my usual genre, so it took me a little to get used to the pace, but I loved the connections between the characters and how the plot was driven by them.

I absolutely loved Elsie!! It was interesting following along as she explored her identity and figured out who she was. I loved the way the author highlighted the cultural differences and her family’s perceptions towards the LGBTQ+ community, and consequently the impact that had on Elsie. I loved the diversity and how many unique identities were represented. I also loved how it explored the impact of platonic friendships and the importance they have in our lives. Because, like Elsie, I feel people forget they exist because we place much emphasis on romantic relationships.

I also really liked the side plot of Elsie and her first job at the comic book store. It gave her a place in the real world to be herself and be around people who just wanted to be seen and accepted for who they are. It gave her a safe place to explore who she was as a person, and it was so relatable with all the diverse and interesting characters passing through the shop.

This is literally just me being picky, but one thing that bothered me was some chapters ended rather abruptly. It didn’t feel like there was any continuity between chapters. I found that quite jolting, to be honest.

The ending was so cute and perfect and everything I didn’t know I needed. I loved the representation in this book. It was incredible. And exploring Elsie’s cultural identity was very eye opening to other people’s experiences, especially how difficult it can be coming out to family.

Honestly, this was such a heartwarming character driven book that left me feeling emotional and understood. It was beautifully written, exploring the struggles and triumphs of identity and growing up. I can’t wait to read more from the author in the future.

Thank you to Netgalley, the publisher and author, for a chance to read and review this book.

This was a good QPOC YA contemporary featuring messy teens, bad decisions, a bit of hubris and a good little dose of mystery. This is a bit of a character study, I felt, and I enjoyed the book!

If You Still Recognise Me is a fantastic coming-of-age story with a diverse cast of characters.
This is a feel-good story about young love and fandoms that has tonnes of amazing LGBTQ+ representation.
I found this a really easy, compelling read with emotive writing that made it very easy to binge read.
I did however think that some of the relationships progressed a little too fast and that some of the plot points were too convenient and predictable.

Such a beautiful and heartwarming story 🥹🥰 I’ve struggled a bit with reading anything recently but this book turned out to be a perfect cure for my slump! ‘If you still recognise me’ is a book about self-discovery, finding love for your roots, friendship but mostly about taking life the way it is and not missing on the opportunities it gives us. As I always tell myself: it’s better to regret doing something than to regret not doing it.

One thing I found a bit creepy( and one of the characters also found it to be that way) is the idea of doing something crazy, like trying to look for someone from the past of our online friend’s grandma, for a person we barely know. Moreover, what Elsie did could be taken in real life as some sort of stalking because it’s definitely a invasion of privacy.

If we ignore the whole craziness I just mentioned, this book is worth reading! It’s fast-paced and has likeable characters, which makes the whole experience very pleasant. I really enjoyed ‘If you still recognise me’ and I’m very grateful to NetGalley for giving me the opportunity to read it.

*Thank you Netgalley for an advance copy of this book.*

“If You Still Recognise Me” is a story about found families, self-love, and the importance of having a community where you belong. It is also about beautiful friendships, slow burn romance and nerd culture.

Elsie feels completely lost during her last summer as a teenager. Her family doesn’t know she’s queer, her crush Ada lives an ocean away and her past relationship still haunts her. Her life changes drastically when her long-lost best friend Joan walks back into her life after years of silence.

I will say without a doubt this book is top 3 on my reading of the year. It moved me so much that I don’t think I can’t describe it with words, however I will try.
This is a simple story full of meaning and heart. A story that talks about a generation that grew up using social media and making friends online. A story about belonging and feeling lonely even in your own skin. Reading about Elsie’s story felt a lot like looking into a mirror. The character is beautifully written and has a lot of layers that makes you get to know her and deeply care for her. Many of her struggles resonated with me and I felt close to her the whole journey.
Elsie’s relationship with her family is real and beautiful. It isn’t perfect but that makes you feel less alone.

Another thing that I really enjoyed was the nerd input of the story. Elsie works in a comic book store and as a past bookseller myself, I could feel her passion and her hunger for knowledge. I’m proud to say I was the bookseller that recommended queer stories to those that came to ask and had a great time sharing those precious minutes with customers. Being a nerd brought me great friendships, connections and stories and I truly wish, if you are passionate about something, you find someone to share it with.

You can feel that the author put a lot of themselves in this story and is this what makes it beautiful. Every single detail was put it there with care and meaning. Every relationship has great importance for the main character, and you follow her journey as if you were Elsie’s friend.

As a special mention to this book I will say it has close to zero white straight characters and that makes me really happy. The book is full of different cultures and different experiences, which make it really interesting.

The love story (or should I say stories) was beautifully written and made me smile and cheer up out loud several times through the book.

It was a perfect reading and even when I kind of knew what was going to happen at the end, I also enjoyed it a lot. This book was like a hug, a warm walk in a summer afternoon, a hot tea on a rainy day…

I won’t ever get tired of recommending this book to anyone that crosses my path. Really, make yourself a favour and read this, you can thank me lately!

I’m not an easy crier. When something makes me cry it’s a Notable Event because it happens so rarely. This book made me cry tears of joy. Twice.

Something I think is a near universal experience is having lost contact with someone who was once hugely important to you. Maybe one of you moved away, or maybe you had a falling out, or maybe you just drifted apart as time moved on. I’ve certainly got my fair share of former friends who I’m probably always still going to love a little even if we haven’t spoken in years and even if it’s no longer possible for us to contact each other. A huge running theme in this book is people reconnecting with someone they used to love and finding that the relationship between them isn’t as broken as they feared it was. Sometimes, even finding that the relationship between them has the potential to develop in directions they’d never let themselves consider before.

Which feeds into another theme, which is being truly understood and seen by someone. Something this book highlights is how meaningful it is when someone gets you and simultaneously encourages you to be the best version of yourself you can be while also loving you for who you are. When you know you can be entirely yourself around someone without hiding anything away, you know that’s someone you want to keep around, and this book shows that with both platonic and romantic relationships.

I really loved the emphasis on queer friendships this had! The core relationship is a romantic one, but even before the main couple get together Elsie finds herself increasingly surrounded by other queer people, and it’s incredibly healing for her. Elsie at the end of the book is miles and miles away from Elsie at the start, and her friendships have a lot to do with this. Talking with queer people who she shares experiences with and talking with queer people who have different experiences from her, either by having different queer identities than her or by living somewhere else in the world from her, adds so much richness to Elsie’s life and, as a result, to the book’s narrative as well. I also liked that some characters didn’t have everything concretely figured out yet, and how there wasn’t any condemnation of this. One of these characters showed no sign of getting any closer to figuring themself out by the end of the book and that’s okay! Nobody is under any obligation to use a label if they aren’t ready to or plain don’t want to. I really appreciated that being reflected here.

As someone who’s been in online fandoms for nearly half my life at this point, yes. A hundred percent yes. Yes to the enthusiasm, yes to the formation of serious friendships through it, and yes to the frustration that comes when the fandom at large fixates on the (sometimes villainous) white guy when there are other non-white and/or non-man characters Right There, who are sometimes more important to the series’ actual narrative, who are getting ignored. It’s deeply annoying and unfortunately happens all the time. Just look at what happened with the Star Wars sequel trilogy.

Elsie’s a fun main character! She’s sweet, a little shy, and just the right amount of oblivious to make reading her thought process entertaining without crossing over into irritation. A believable amount of obliviousness coming from a high school leaver who’s due to go to Cambridge. Also, her growing up in Oxford and then choosing to go to Cambridge is very entertaining to me as someone who also went to the university that has a rivalry with the university closest to their hometown. Not Oxbridge, but still.

Despite all this, and despite the fact that it made me happy cry twice, this book isn’t all sunshine and rainbows. In fact I’d argue that a lot of it isn’t. A lot of it is slow paced, character driven, and dealing with Elsie’s family problems. The book begins with the death of her grandfather who lives in Hong Kong, and her mother bringing her grandmother to live with them for a while in the aftermath, despite none of her immediate family having had any contact with their family in Hong Kong for nearly a decade. In addition to this, Elsie’s still emotionally recovering from a toxic relationship that’s still affecting her over a year after its end. These are heavy topics, and I think So dealt with them excellently, and blended them seamlessly with the lighter aspects of the story.

Plus, the title drop was one of the best ones I’ve ever seen. That was when I started crying.

This book was sooooo gay. I loved it. Not only was the main character bisexual, but they represented all manner of bi and gay people. It also shared something about the lesbian culture in Hong Kong and some of how they labelled themselves, which was really interesting to read about.

It was full longing and crushes, which were beautifully written and I could not tell most of the way through who Elsie would end up with.

It also had references to an abusive relationship, which the main character Elsie is still recovering from. It also showed the family pressures of not feeling entirely safe to come out around your family, both with the feelings of disapproval that Elsie gets from her own family and the out right homophobia from Joan's father.

I also adored how much about fandom it was and especially that it was about fandom but without the main character being a writer.

A really heartwarming story, I really enjoyed the fandom/tumblr moments as it brought me back to my teenage years (wow, I never thought I’d say that!) and it just hit home. Queer tumblr ❤️

this book!!! this book made me so 🥹. i loved the exploration of queerness in this book and i also loved the main character a lot! cannot wait to read more books by cynthia so!

If You Still Recognize me is a beautiful book. I really liked the story and especially the fandom part. It was so relatable and so much fun to read, I couldn’t put it down. I loved reading about the fandom spaces, because I’ve been in quite a few, and it can have a lot of effect on you, which this book showed very well.

There was so much representation which I loved, it’s great to see that the main character is confident in her sexuality, but at the same time you see other characters figuring out their own sexuality, which I just loved much. ALSO ADULT QUEERS?!! I love it and want more of it.

This book follows our main character Elsie in the summer between her A-Levels and the start of university. Elsie has a crush on Ada, a beautiful and brilliant fanfiction writer she met on Tumblr but has not yet met in person. Everything goes well until her childhood best friend, Joan, comes back into her life.

In this pivotal time in her life, Elsie finds herself struggling with identity - her identity as a woman from Hong Kong in the face of a society which does not deem her traditionally (caucasian standards) beautiful, her identity as a young bisexual woman whose parents may or may not accept her identity, her identity as someone dipping her toe into the LGBT+ community she is a part of, but unable to quite come out to her family, Struggling with things like the way she presents herself to the world, now girly and feminine in a way she often doesn't feel matches her, she also has difficulty expressing herself through her clothes, not just her words.

This story felt like a tribute to the young fandom Tumblr LGBT+ kids. Many of us made friends on that app who felt like the only people who understood us - we could hyper-obsess over a manga/tv show/film and make fanfics and edits and that was totally acceptable within that app. People could be themselves. Perhaps I enjoyed this book so much because I felt it call me out, and at the same time do so in such a loving way it felt comforting.

Elsie makes mistakes, and I found her incredibly impulsive - but honestly, what a realistic change to a flawless hero some authors would choose to make her at the ripe old age of 18. In a way I am glad she is so impulsive, because this is something I feel I could see in a real life person, and who would likely try to work on that at their next stage in life! A character whose inner thoughts deal with all the difficulties she's having, the thought processes she is going through and though you don't always relate, you can absolutely understand where she's coming from.

Overall, I found this book charming, heart-warming and at the same time felt like it covered quite serious topics in such a tasteful way. Genuinely recommend, especially to teenagers who are at that stage in their lives but as a 24 year old I loved it all the same!

Trigger warnings: <spoiler> mentions of abusive/toxic relationships (off page, only referenced), homophobia (implied and consequences, no slurs that I can recall) </spoiler>

<i>I received a complimentary copy of this novel from Little Tiger Group via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review, which I leave voluntarily</i>.