This book is not an easy read as it deals with some sensitive topics. However it is written so sensitively. The characters are great. There is a mystery at the centre.

What a stunning debut! Heart-felt and poignant, I'm utterly bereft at having finished this beautiful story.

This is one heck of a debut novel! I couldn't put it down. It is a lovely coming of age story about Nik, the main character who is starting University after his grandfather's death and keen to find out more about his father who he never knew. The relationship between Nik and his mother was really well written and kept me gripped.

The Things That We Lost, highlights the relationship between a mother and son during his first year at university. The book examines, their grief but recently and in the past.

A fantastic novel, that highlights the Brit=Asian experience in London, with all the food and family life you would expect but also the racism.

CW Parental Death and Suicide.

The Things That We Lost was another brilliant and worthy winner of the Merky Books New Writers’ prize. It touched on a lot of topics but I particularly enjoyed seeing the story from a South Asian male POV, where he is tackling some of the things that males don’t typically discuss openly: grief, love and mental health.

There was an ongoing thread that kept me engaged as the story unfolded, as well as the fact that it did feel quite real to me - maybe because it’s set in my hometown or that the cultural aspects felt familiar. I do wish it dove deeper into some of the topics, such as Nik’s depression and perhaps his mother’s new relationship, as I think there were a lot of aspects I would’ve happily continued reading for!

Looking forward to the author’s next book - the storytelling was beautiful.

I received an advanced reading copy of this novel in exchange for an honest review. Thank you to NetGalley, Merky Books/Random House/Cornerstone and the author Jyoti Patel.
An interesting story and well written but not enough activity, character development or action to keep you hooked and engaged. It's a fairly conventional family drama and although it has some warm moments, it felt bland at times and overly long for the content and denouement that eventually appeared at the last minute. For that reason, 3 stars (rounded up).

This was a lovely moving book of grief and sadness and the family ties. Took me a while to get into but enjoyed it thoroughly

Patel's novel is a breath of fresh air. She tackles loss in a really interesting way. It's not plebeian motto's but through Avani and Nik, it's a bit like sitting in group therapy; she doesn't hide away from the reality of the experience. Despite the heavy subject matter, it is a pleasurable read as the prose has a playful quality and interesting dimension through the use of other languages. There's a good balance of characters in ages and genders too. Highly recommend, not as as one of those books to read in one sitting, but to take your time with and sink into.

This debut novel from writer Jyoti Patel has already landed the 2021 #Merky Books New Writers Prize, and it’ll only take a few pages for you to understand why. Teenage Nik knows it’s best not to ask his mother Avani about what happened to his father, who died suddenly before Nik was born, but when his beloved grandfather Rohan passes away everything changes: including the family’s unspoken rules about what’s best left undisturbed. Nik’s questions now need to be answered so he can learn the truth about the shadows which have hung over his family for as long as he can remember – while he also juggles the everyday demands of life in London and the accompanying watchful aunties, university studies away from home in the North of England, and his relationships with friends both old and new. Though his mother has kept secrets to protect her son, it slowly becomes apparent that some truths are better out than in – and Avani’s slow journey through her own abusive childhood and navigating her tricky relationship with her brother, Nik’s uncle, will leave you heartbroken for her losses and cheering her on as she steps closer to where she should have been, had her husband not passed away. This is a spectacularly written and totally absorbing book, rich with layers, nuance and emotion, and packed with beautifully descriptive prose. It’ll make you physically feel the characters’ losses, make you hungry for the family’s beautifully-described Gujarati dishes, and cross your fingers for a swift sequel so you can spend even more time in Nik and Avani’s world.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.

I wasn't expecting to be so moved by this book, but it really packed a hefty emotional punch. Nik's struggle with mental health after his grandfather's death and his need to find out about his father was very relatable, and I often found myself just willing Avani to be more open. But of course Patel also explains why Avani has kept these things from her son, which is also completely understandable. I'll definitely look out for future books by this author.

Jeyoti Patel presents modern british life through the eyes of Avani and her son Nikhil. They are grieving the loss of Avani's father but have also lost Nikhil's dad. Nikhil has finished school embarks on a journey to learn about his Dad's death and his legacy. As Nikhil goes away to university he learns about himslf and his family.

I had no idea what to expect from this book but I thought it would be something that I could get swept up in. Fraught family ties and an exploration of a secret past are some of my favourite themes within literary fiction, so I was interested to see what this one was all about.

When Nik’s beloved grandfather dies, he suddenly has some leads that might take him to the father that he never met. His mother Avani has been hiding a great pain and she is at once afraid that the carefully crafted life she has built for herself and her son is about to crumble. Can a mother and son reconcile over what they’ve both lost?

We do get some flashback scenes to Avani’s youth and her early romance with Elliot. As a young couple, they go through a lot and I was so inspired by their relentless love. Avani’s mother is abusive and her whole family, apart from her father and brother, disapprove of Elliot as he’s a white boy. My heart broke as Avani describes how her mother was still trying to set her up with a Gujarati boy the night before her wedding and how she’d been locked in her bedroom during a family party. The anguish and guilt but steadfast determination to stick by the man she loves was beautiful, which made Elliot’s tragic fate hit even harder.

The book is about grief and the ripple effect it can have over time. During his grandfather’s funeral, Nik experiences intense anger that he (and the rest of the world) is just expected to move on with life, when it feels like time has stood still. I really felt both Nik and Avani’s intense emotions throughout the book and was fascinated by their different ways of coping. Nik turns into himself despite being a university fresher and Avani gets a dog!

Avani had a serious relationship with an American man named Paul, who was there for much of Nik’s childhood, so Nik considers Paul his stepdad. However, neither Nik nor Avani had seen Paul for years before Nik’s grandfather’s funeral. The truth of the ending of Avani and Paul’s relationship is revealed to Nik for the first time in the book, so it’s almost like Nik loses two father figures in the space of the narrative, which amps up his search for information about his biological father. I liked Paul for most of the book, so when Avani dropped the ‘twist’ of what happened between the two of them, I was shook. Suddenly, I saw Paul in a whole new light and sadly, so did Nik.

As is often the case in books that feature multiracial characters, Nik seems to struggle with his cultural identity. I don’t know whether this is true to life for most multiracial people but it seems that a lot of fictional characters with mixed parentage feel disconnected from at least one of their heritages. Having been born and raised in London, Nik doesn’t feel Indian despite being raised by a single Indian mother and having a close relationship with his Indian grandfather. I don’t know if he feels guilty about it because he had a great relationship with his grandfather in spite of that disconnect but Nik goes through some very dark times in the book and I wonder if his identity struggles contributed to that.

The Things That We Lost is an emotional book that charts grief and how it manifests. It’s also about cherishing our lost loved ones and the importance of keeping their memories alive. The characters felt very authentic and I was very invested in what happened to them. I anticipated a hard hitting ending and while it wasn’t the ending I suspected (good!), it still hit me in the feels. A wonderfully written portrait of a mother and son relationship that is going through a rough patch but is still full of love.

Nik ist als indischstämmiger Junge im multikulturellen London aufgewachsen. Sein Vater starb noch vor seiner Geburt und seine Mutter war grösstenteils alleinerziehend. Zu seinem Grossvater hat er eine besondere und enge Beziehung.

Als sein Grossvater im Sterben liegt, verrät er Nik das Versteck eines Schlüssels, kommt aber nicht mehr dazu ihm zu erzählen, was es damit auf sich hat. Nik weiss, dass es etwas mit seinem verstorbenen Vater zu tun haben muss. Seiner Mutter verrät er nichts, denn die reagiert mit Schweigen auf Nachfrage nach seinem Vater. Er starb bei einem Autounfall, mehr weiss er nicht.

Nach dem Tod des Grossvaters fällt Nik in ein tiefes Loch. Seine wichtigste Bezugsperson ist weg, seine Mutter versinkt in der Trauer. Bewaffnet mit dem ominösen Schlüssel und neuen Informationen über seine Eltern, versucht er in Erfahrung zu bringen, was seine Mutter all die Jahre vor ihm verborgen hat.

Mir gefiel die feinfühlig erzählte Geschichte, die Protagonisten und die Einblicke in die indische Kultur, die von den Migranten auch in England gelebt wird. Ich hätte so gern mal eine Tasse des allgegenwärtigen Chai-Tees probiert,…

Themen: Trauer, Beziehungen, Liebe, Familiengeschichte, Multikulti, Migration, Rassismus, Tradition, Freundschaft, Schutz, Vergangenheit

I thoroughly enjoyed this book and will be looking out for the author in future.
It tells the story of Avani and her son Nik. Nik has turned 18 and is getting ready to go to university when his Grandfather dies. This prompts Nik to consider how little he knows about his own father who died before he was born. However Avani is reluctant to share any information with Nik about his father.
I really loved Avani and Nik and could relate to the journey they were both going through.
I would definitely recommend - loved it!

A saga with India at its heart, we start with young love and uni days and are then taken back and forth through this family’s lifetime to find out what has caused such discord. This is a slow burn but worth sticking with. The imagery is beautiful and the writing sings along.

Wow The author has done an amazing job at creating imaginary characters and situations that depict the world and society. The characters focus on themes of growing, self-discovery and confronting personal and social problems. This is a first for me by the author and one I enjoyed and would read more of their work

Wow...... I did not know what to expect when I picked this up, but it was SOOO MUCH BETTER than I imagined!!

You've got a dual POV but in third person. A mum and her son, living their lives but telling their individual stories. It's so soooo interesting!! I am not sure who I loved more. I mean, Nike stressed me out but he was very realistic - the language is quite funny, especially because its true to how young people speak these days!!

I will never forget that one chapter with Avanti and her mum..... I feel sad just thinking about it. It's a great story, one I think everyone will love

Having read too many books about family, loss and migration, The Things That We Lost was slightly different from the usual but it didn't stand out to me. After a slow start and an overstretched mystery, the story didn't have any satisfying ending.

Was so glad to have been given the chance to read this book, what an amazing story of love and loss. Trying to find out what happened to the dad he never had the chance to meet, while going away to start uni and get over the death of his grandad. Nik has a lot on his plate his mum is not able to open up and help Nik to find the answers he is looking for, who can help Nik find the answers to the many questions he has.

This is a truly wonderful Book which covers so many of the issues that still exists in our society today within Families of varying Cultures . I would give this Book more than 5*'s if I could.
It is beautifully & very sensitively written , touching on the complexities of Love for friends & family, of Grief, Depression, Acceptance for who we are no matter what our background is . This Book will make you laugh & cry & also even question things in the complexities of your own life .#NetGalley, #Goodreads, #FB, #Instagram, #Amazon.co.uk, # <img src="https://www.netgalley.com/badge/358a5cecda71b11036ec19d9f7bf5c96d13e2c55" width="80" height="80" alt="100 Book Reviews" title="100 Book Reviews"/>, #<img src="https://www.netgalley.com/badge/ef856e6ce35e6d2d729539aa1808a5fb4326a415" width="80" height="80" alt="Reviews Published" title="Reviews Published"/>, #<img src="https://www.netgalley.com/badge/aa60c7e77cc330186f26ea1f647542df8af8326a" width="80" height="80" alt="Professional Reader" title="Professional Reader"/>.