At first I was enjoying this. But then as others have said, the sheer swearing and amount of f**king became noticeable and overdone. I’m no prude, but it was excessive and the plot felt like it lurched from new character to new character, interspersed with sex with the porn star, or reference to someone else having sex or wanting to (and in derogatory language). By the end, I was just looking to finish, rather than actively wanting to know what happened or why.

I will say the audiobook narrator was excellent and made it at least easy to listen to from that point of view.

I received a free ARC copy of the audio book in return for an unbiased review.

I heard the buzz about S.A Cosby's novels and I certainly wasn't disappointed, If you like your crime gritty, dark and noir-ish then this novel is for you. I can't recommend enough and this certainly won't be the last novel that I read.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for a copy of the novel in exchange for an honest review.

I loved razorblade tears and so I had very high expectations about this one. It didn't disappoint if you consider the fact that it's the author's debut novel.
The narration was very good and plot reminded me those 1940's private eye movies.. but with a twist. The descriptions of women and sex scenes were very cringe but once you get passed that it's a pretty decent read!

Nathan Waymaker is a former Marine, an ex-cop, and he currently lives and works at the funeral home owned by his cousin. Despite being a generally good guy he also has a temper and a huge one at that! When the leader of a local church was shot to death it seems like the cops maynot be doing the best, so some of the parishioners ask Nathan to check up on the police. Nathan soon learns that he is up against crime lords, low life criminals, crooked cops, corruption, and a not so honorable preacher.

“The truth is no one can be fully protected. Safety is an illusion. There is no safety. Just downtime between tragedies.”

As for the book, it’s gritty, violent, funny. It was almost like watching a no bars hold action movie. Violent and even gross at times but it was so well balanced with the humour that I enjoyed it every bit. Please note that I am not a fan of action movies! There’s even the obligatory bad ass friend in the form of Nathan’s buddy Skunk. There’s also some humor along with it which kept the narrative interesting and enjoyable. Nathan was an intriguing lead character. And I loved how he had his grey area and how aware he was of it. Something else that I found different and interesting was that even though the author beautifully portrays the racism and all its associated injustices, he also acknowledges the improvements that have been happening lately even if they are nowhere near completion. This kind-of gave the characters the aura of survivors and hence a glimpse of optimism for the future which I have found lacking in many black history based books which solely focus on the victimisation. It’s not because I am not sympathetic or unsupportive of the issues all of us are facing, but I as a person like to see some ray of hope in the future. If not ,what is the whole point to life?
5 ⭐️ read. Definitely recommended!!
Thanks to @netgalley and @macmillanaudio for the review copy.

Damn, Adam Lazarre-White is a wonderful narrator - no comments other than brilliant!

Lots of violence, some misogyny, quite a few descriptive sex scenes and more than a couple of swear words - one to listen to with headphones on! It did take me 25 - 30% to properly get hooked, and I'm glad I did!

Nate is a former marine and ex deputy sheriff in a small Southern town. He now works at his cousin’s funeral home collecting bodies and helping out with the funerals. He also....gets things done.

When the local pastor dies in suspicious circumstances the police decide it was suicide, however a couple of the devout old ladies suspect this and offer Nate $2000 to find out what really happened. Lots of hidden secrets and dark twists propel the story to where it needs to go.

Excellent cover, dark, foreboding, in black and white with storm clouds ahead and a small chapel. Totally in keeping with the tone of the novel and an indication of what is to come.

The narrator displays a nice range of voices and in particular I loved the African bodyguards. The delivery is on the slow side with pauses but this brings a depth and gravity to the performance.

The plot is relatively straightforward, Nathan is asked by two ladies to use his former police contacts to ask around to determine why their pastor, Rev. Watkins’, death didn’t seem to be being investigated. It is being ‘swept under the carpet’ and treated as suicide even though it was a gunshot to the chest. A simple look at the body in the funeral home where he works shows it was no suicide. Reluctantly Nathan agrees to get involved and it is his terrier like tenaciousness that makes him go on long after it becomes unwise and eventually lethal.
Watkins it seems was not a pure clergyman, having a chequered past involving drugs, guns and prostitution, but later he was found by God.

Nathan is a focussed and determined man whose past frames his present. Nathan’s father was white and mother was black which meant racism was never far away. As far as some white were concerned he was just another uppity black but also even within the black community there was some suspicion that he wasn’t black enough. A lifetime of this meant he fights back against racism and bullying, perfectly illustrated by an incident on the school bus. His parents were good people who instilled in him fine morals and a community ethos, it was their deaths that freed his anchor. They were run of the road by a drunken driver, who was the privileged son of a wealthy banker. He avoided jail because vital evidence was ‘lost’ by the police department and later in the story we discover how little this cost to be arranged. This was what made Nathan leave the department and instilled his hatred of local police officers. The search for justice for his parents lead to him crossing a line that he shouldn’t. Nathan isn’t an evil man but rather a good man whose environment contributes to him doing bad things as these back stories demonstrate.

The story is told in first person and bowls along like Nathan’s 57 Chevvy pickup truck, gradually picking up speed as it works its way through the gears, threatening to knock over anything in its path, until it comes to a crashing stop at end of the road. The ending itself produces a couple of twists and surprises along with a fine example of unintended consequences.

I have to say this is a violent novel, there are killings, plenty of fights (some scenes very long) and testosterone splashed around like your grandad putting on Old Spice. For me this is within the framing of the plot but it’s strong stuff. Nathan also has a friend Skunk, who plays wingman when required and he is a true professional a killer of ten men, or was it eleven Nathan was never quite sure, but also an expert scene cleaner, so vital in these days of CSI.

The prose itself is fabulous, at times dark and brooding, at others its almost an intense force that hits you like a punch on the nose. The author also is an expert of the wisecracking, sharp tongued dialogue and descriptions beloved of the hard-boiled genre which bring the necessary lift. There is also a lovely streak of black humour, the sort of this you would expect from undertakers such as when an old lady dies post coitus at a care home but I will add no more and spoil that one.

Although very much a male dominated book there is female interest provided by Rev Watkin’s daughter Lisa who is a high profile porn star in LA. She is enlightened as much as businesswoman adding more than ‘a tart with a heart’ trope. Her history is harrowing and once Nathan becomes involved with her it adds to his drive.

I read S.A. Cosby’s incredible Razorblade Tears in September 2022 – my full review is here and met Sean the same month at Capital Crime Book Festival in London. When I saw that Netgalley had his debut novel available as an audible book I immediately downloaded it.

Firstly, I need to say I have the biggest crush on Adam Lazarre-White’s voice.. I have never heard anything quite so soulful, sexy and seductive and as I only listen to audio books whilst walking my dog Riley, I think I may have exhausted my poor dog because I just kept on walking…. even thinking about Adam’s voice gives me the shivers !!

So back to the book, My Darkest Prayer was first published in Jan 2019 and has been republished in Dec 2022. Nathan (Nate) Waymaker is a former marine and sheriff’s deputy in a small town and now works at his cousin’s funeral home collecting bodies and helping out with the funerals.

When the local pastor dies in suspicious circumstances the police decide it was suicide, however several of his parishioners approach Nathan because of his previous role within the sheriff’s department to look into his death and offer to pay him $2000 for any information. As Nathan begins to dig he starts to uncover some really unsavoury facts regarding the church and the newly deceased minister.

As with Razorblade Tears, you can expect lots of violence and as the body count start racking up, Nathan finds himself in serious danger.

This wonderful Southern tale simmers with danger and darkness. There is graphic violence throughout the book and also lots of sex…. I adored Nate and his buddy Skunk and loved all the dry humour and brilliant dialogue.

I would 100% recommend this book especially as an audio as I thought that Adam Lazarre-White was able to bring all the characters to life and I am thrilled to see that he has also narrated Razorblade Tears and Blacktop Wasteland which I have just downloaded and can’t wait to start.

Dark, gritty, brutal, and poetic, Cosby certainly knows how to portray the dark corners of life with some wry humour. This is a re-print of his debut novel and is just as fantastic as the ensuing novels. The central protagonist, Nathan, knows how to "handle bodies" as an ex marine and working at the family undertakers. When parishioners feel that the local police are not investigating their pastor's death properly, they ask him to step in. What should be some easy money making, leads him towards the seedy underbelly of the town and all that is corrupt therein - gangs, criminals, corrupt cops and not so holy clergy. Superbly narrated. #mydarkestprayer #sacosby #netgalley

I am about the last person on earth not to have read Razorblade Tears, and this is a grievous error I will soon be rectifying, because my God, SA Cosby can write.

Taking care of the bodies as a first chapter and i thought it would be a body snatcher story. It wasn't however there was a few bodies involved, sex scenes and depravity. The main character works as an undertaker after a career in Military and Police, his life has not been easy and he seeks revenge on the people who murdered his parents. There are a few side threads which run alongside the main plot and give some depth and clarity into the unfolding saga in a sleepy small town in US. Took me to 25% to get into the story then it flowed well. Thank you #NetGalley for the audiobook to review.

I'm a huge fan of SA Cosby, having discovered his books last year.. Dark and gritty in all the right ways. It's like poetry on a page. Nate is a great leading man, and blasts his way through chapter after chapter of of bone crunching, gutsy, take no prisoners action. Seriously cannot recommend this book and this author highly enough.

I just loved the narration I could listen to him for ages - what a voice and what a great audio book narrator, he just brought the book to life. The story was very dark and intense and graphic so be warned.

I was given a copy by netgalley and the publishers but the review is entirely my own.

My Darkest Prayer tells the story of Nathan Waymaker, former marine and sheriff’s deputy and now an assistant at his cousins funeral home.
So when he is asked by local parishioners to look into the death of a much loved minister, he reluctantly agrees. This soon becomes a case he wishes he left alone. It uncovers crooked cops, dodgy gangsters and vengeful crime bosses, all in the shadow of a nefarious preacher and his mysterious wife.
Narrated by the quite excellent Adam Lazarre-White.
The narrator tells a story of corruption and sleaze in a small southern town, with some aplomb. I found myself immersed in his story telling and his ability to draw the listener in.
This novel is a truly fantastic piece of literature.
S A Cosby has a writing style that is simply on another level. I’ve only come across few writers like this, authors like James Lee Burke, Walter Mosley, Lawrence Block and Dennis Lehane, and now I have to add Mr Cosby’s voice to this very exclusive club. This is an outstanding book and one everyone should either read or listen to.

I usually read books so this was my first foray with an audible book and I have to say, what a wonderful experience. SA Cosby writes the darkest tales and this was a dramatic and original story. Set in Virginia with the protagonist, Nathan, working in a funeral home, the last place where there is segregation in the US, My Darkest Prayer combines the stories of those who died naturally (not many in Cosby's writing) with those who came to meet their maker by violent means. The story is well written and characters are authentic and intriguing. The Virginia country-side is not quiet nor suburban in the traditional sense but a hotch-potch of criminality, money-laundering and wild parties. A thrilling listen and Adam Lazarre-White has the best voice for Cosby's work.

3.75 stars

The Plot:
This mystery follows veteran Nathan who works in a funeral home with his cousin. After the death of a beloved pastor in a church of many 'former sinners' as it were, Nathan is asked to investigate his death by some of the church-goers. It is fairly quickly that he realises he is way in over his head, and this is a lot bigger than he had initially anticipated.

Review:
I enjoyed this book quite a lot and particularly the main character who is not your conventional MC, he is not your standard 'good guy' and he knows this. The story and dialogue had a lot of grit which made it quite an interesting tale, much more so than a normal police procedural which I'm quite tired of really. It was very fast-paced and I genuinely didn't see where it was going until the very end - and even then I wasn't sure what turns were going to be taken.

I have to say the story resolution felt very satisfying and left it in a way that I could see Nate making a comeback in another novel, though I'm not aware of any series planned. There was a bit of spice which was *hot* but infrequent.

I listened to this in audiobook format and a big part of my enjoyment was the narrator who did an amazing job of a lively telling and following with different accents and tones for different cast members. Overall, I think it was a great format to enjoy it in, though I am sure reading in paper would also provide a good experience.

Look forward to reading more S.A. Crosby as he produces more works!

4*. SA Cosby’s debut and possibly my favourite from an incredibly talented writer.

Nathan Waymaker works in a local funeral parlour. When a revered local minister is found dead, potentially by his own hand, the local congregation ask Nathan to look into what may have happened. However, Nathan is a mortician with previous careers including time in the Marines and the Police. As Nathan reluctantly looks into what may have happened, he starts to unravel a series of events which goes deep into local society.

The plotting is fantastic but it’s the language which sets SA Cosby put as someone who is in a very special league of literature crime fiction. While this is his debut, this is as good (if not better) than that which follows. Maybe a tadge violent for me, beyond that I loved it. I listened to the audiobook, narrated by Adam Lazrarre-White, who evokes the story brilliantly.

Thanks to Headline Audio and Netgalley for the advance copy. Hugely recommended.

I never read anything by SA Cosby before even if I read tons of praises. It was a great experience: a gritty and dark story, a Southern noir that kept me hooked and I couldn't stop.
There's a multilayered story, there's a great and well developed cast of characters, there's a solid plot and some humour.
This story reminded me of Hap&Leonard, one of my fav series, but it stands on its own Mr Cosby is a very talented writer.
The audiobook add layers and it was an immersive experience.
Highly recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher for this audiobook all opinions are mine

I’m a huge fan of S.A. Cosby’s writing and this is the first book that he published, now re-issued after the runaway success of both Blacktop Wasteland and Razorblade Tears. I was so keen to read this and I wasn’t disappointed. Cosby’s writing is rich and authentic. He understands poverty and the travails of the working classes and couples this with a real feel for dialogue and a brilliant look at the way some religious proponents exploit the poorest in society. It’s raw and often violent but that enhances the power of this writing and at is gripping.

Waymaker is tasked by two religious parishioners to ask the police some questions about the death of their Pastor. With no love lost between Nathan and his former colleagues, he knows it’s not the easiest of asks, but how hard can it be to earn £2k just for asking questions?

Soon though, Nathan is up to his neck in gangsters but finds an unlikely ally in the daughter of the deceased who is now a well-known porn star and who has some enlightening information to share about her father.

In this dark Southern tale the atmosphere is claustrophobic and redolent with danger. Waymaker and his friend Skunk have to be prepared to take on the deadliest enemies and expose the dark underbelly of some of the County’s most respected religious leaders.

Cosby creates a compelling, violent scenario which plumbs the depth of sexual practices and exposes the moral hypocrisy surrounding these religious leaders. It’s dark, brutal and compelling. Brilliant writing, superb narration. I was transfixed.

It's a sign of how popular and well received SA Cosby's first two 'officially published' novels have been that his first novel has now been republished, complete with an introduction from the author. In that introduction he states that this piece of work was from a writer in progress - one who was already fluent in writing short stories but chose this as his first real attempt at a novel. (taking his own experience of working in a funeral home as a component in the story). To this end, it is a little less polished in style than Razorblade Tears or Blacktop Wasteland in terms of writing subtlety (Descriptions, particularly physical ones, are a little over written, the humour signposted by 'he/ she broke out laughing at my response'' or other characters remarking on the witticisms coming from a funny guy whereas the following books were confident enough to just let them stand on their own. while showing clearly the skill in writing dialogue, attitude and action scenes that would follow.
Nathan Waymaker is an ex-marine, ex-cop, current funeral home worker, who gets involved with a suspicious suicide when he's asked to investigate by associates of the dead man. What follows is a tangled web involving church, authorities and local bad guys big and small.
There are certain elements which showed the author's influences - some of which would carry through to his break through novels: there were dashes of Joe Lansdale and Andrew Vachss in it for me, as well as the character Skunk, who plays the role in this novel that Joe Pike plays in early Robert Crais novels or Win plays in earlier Myron Bolitar novels from Harlan Coben in terms of a deadly, shadowy cameo colleague.
I listened to the audio version which was exceptionally well read and really captured the style and mood of the author's words.
Is it as good as the author's follow up novels? Perhaps not: the characters are a little more broadly painted and the storyline is a little more 'generic' in set up and resolution, but I've still rated it five stars - compared to most crime/ mystery books out there this was still very much towards the top of the tree for me.
The ending suggests there might have been the intention, and certainly the scope, to turn this into a series: while the main points of the plot were all completely resolved there were certainly enough finer details around characters and background, as well as a sign things aren't over for the main character, to suggest this could have become an ongoing saga. As much as I enjoyed the book, in the grand scheme of things, maybe it's a good thing it didn't get the plaudits that paved the way for the exceptional books that followed - but I'd be more than happy to hear more about Nathan Waymaker in the future at some point.

The audiobook narrator is incredible! I will read anything that S. A. Cosby writes. His prose is captivating and thrilling in this book, I was intrigued the entire time and didn't want to put it down! It shows the crossover between crime and religion and how it can be used for cover ups but also how pious people aren't perfect and there's a whole underbelly sometimes unbeknownst to others. I love how imperfect and morally-grey the characters are in this book. I enjoyed the pacing of the story and how things began to unfold. Finally I love how the author weaves in Black issues into his stories.