This story is about Clover and what she has learnt in the first part of her life. She has always felt lonely and fears further rejection so hides herself away in a profession where she knows those she works with will soon be gone. She is a "death doula" and works to help dying people deal with any regrets, thoughts or emotions they feel leading up to their death.
The majority of the story centres around her helping Claudia and her family prepare for her passing. In doing this Clover finally faces up to the fact that she's hiding from living (with the help of some not so gentle words from others).

There are a couple of quotes that really struck a cord with me:

Page 87
"Who are we to tell anyone their pain isn't worthy?"

Page 304
"Grief is just love looking for a place to settle."

This is a story that will stay with me for a while. Highly recommend!!

#AD Thank you to Netgalley and VikingBooks for this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
The Collected Regrets of Clover is due to be published on the 6th of July 2023.

One of the most moving, beautiful books I have ever read. Such an unusual premise- Clover's life as a death doula (something I had never heard of before) and her dedication to helping those entering their last days really makes you stop and think about your own life. The characters in this book are wonderful and memorable and will push you to really think about life, our existence and our place in this world.
These amazing characters, particularly Clover and the questions they provoke in you will stay with you long after closing this book.

"Grief is just love looking for a place to settle"

Review also posted to my Instagram page @ericas_bookreviews

It's rare for a book to reduce me to tears nowadays, The Collected Regrets of Clover managed this dubious feat of honour several times, particularly towards the end of the novel. This is one of those novels that is thoughtful and contemplative, it's beautifully written and draws you into the life of Clover as she works with those approaching death. This is a very slow burn novel, focusing in on Clover's work as a death Douala and the individuals she comes across both in her personal and professional life.

Clover is very much a social recluse. Fascinated by death since seeing her teacher die at five years old, she wasn't exactly a popular kid in school. When her parents die in a boating accident shortly afterwards, she is raised by her grandfather; a man of few words, yet full of life. His death when Clover is an adult absolutely shakes the foundations of her world, leading her to become even more insular and isolated.

I empathised with Clover. She's not always the most likeable character and she certainly has her creepy moments. Her social life is almost non-existent and her only real friend is her elderly neighbour who was a close friend of her grandfather. She has her own regrets, particularly about her grandfather's death. And whilst she logs each death she attends in her notebooks full of confessions, regrets and advice, she seems to have forgotten how to live. Until she finds herself embroiled in Claudia's life and death.

Whilst this is an exploration of death, grief and ageing, it is also an affirming exploration of life and what we make of it. It's heartfelt and poignant and doesn't shy away from difficult topics. I was caught by the novel and drawn in by characterisations. It's an unusual novel, but one that I more than recommend.

Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for my free review copy of this title.

When my dad died in a hospice in 2017 I was overawed by the people working there. They weren't death doulas like in this book, they were doctors and nurses and carers, but they still comforted people when they passed over to the next life. And I remember afterwards, thinking how amazing it must be to be that person for someone. How unafraid of death and the dying. And whilst I admit I am too emotional to do that job, it's an industry that I have been interested in and admired ever since.

It's an interesting concept. People (especially in the UK) still have this fear of death and talking about death. I've experienced enough of it over the years that it's no stranger to me. But it's the only certainty of any of us. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away, it just makes it something to fear. And I feel it's important to talk about it. There isn't anything else that we hide away from. We discuss our most intimate situations but we can't bare to discuss the one thing we all have in common. So, if the idea feels a bit heavy for you, a fictional book is a great starting point.

For what could potentially be quite a morale lowering book - what with all the death - it's incredibly life affirming and hopeful and joyful. It's very strong but also light. This book is like a therapy session - in a good way. It shows you just how important life is and to live life without regrets, but without being too preachy. You're so invested in Clover's world that you don't realise how much good the story is doing for you until it's finished and you're alone again.

I know it doesn't really have any effect on the book itself but I adore the name Clover. It's not a name I've really given any prior thought to, but now I have, I think it's just glorious. There's a number of characters but I'll just pick a few to talk about.

I identified with Clover more than I was expecting to. Not the profession side of it, but the introvert, the love of reading, the not wanting to be close to people in case they leave. She was lovely. Then her client Claudia. She is a wonderful character. So beautiful in heart and soul, a bit cheeky; she reminds me of my late grandmother. She's just a wonderful creation. Claudia's grandson Sebastian irked me at first, I found him a bit slimy. But his heart was in the right place. I adored Leo, Clover's elderly neighbour. He was just gorgeous and I wanted to sit with a cup of tea and listen to his stories. Hugo, although a small role, was an important one and I instantly had a warm feeling about him.

I've said before in other reviews that I prefer character development over plot in my reading. And whilst there is a whole lot of plot here, I still think the characters overtake it. The journey they all go on - physically and emotionally - is just beautiful and they felt so human, so real, so like you and me.

I believe this is Mikki's debut novel and it will definitely stay with me for some time. I can't wait to see what else she produces.

Thank you to Netgalley for giving me the opportunity to read and review this arc.

This is probably one of the most poignant books I have ever read. The lessons we learn about not just going through each day the same way are so profound. This book tells us how to actually live in every moment throughout our lives and to change our perspectives on what life actually is. Beautiful characters and beautiful story. Highly recommend

“Don’t let the best parts of life pass you by because you’re too scared of the unknown.”

The book follows a death doula and while her job is related to death, the book's focus is on life and its celebration.

I was a bit nervous going into this book having major death anxiety. Needless to say I found Sebastian the most relatable character.

But this book turned out to be so much more and so little about death. This book is a beautiful homage to life and living it to the fullest. The Advice, Confessions and Regrets notebooks were the most memorable part of the book that left a huge impact on me and gave me something to think about.

It is a book about life, healing, family, friendship, ups and downs, choices, regrets, happiness, acceptance and love in all its forms.

This is a must read.

“The secret to a beautiful death is living a beautiful life.”

We are here.

Thank You NetGalley for this beautiful ARC.

“Grief is just love looking for a place to settle”

Clover supports people in the last days as a death doula. She provides comfort to those alone or finding it difficult to make their peace as they die, yet despite all the advice and regrets she has gathered from her clients along the way, Clover is just existing herself. She leads a lonely life, with her pets for company and an elderly neighbour Leo, who she meets for a weekly mahjong game. When she is asked to support Claudia, an elderly lady who lived an exciting full life as a young woman, Clover begins to realise that she needs to change and start taking risks.

I really enjoyed this debut novel. Despite the subject matter of death, it wasn’t dark and depressing, quite the opposite, I found it uplifting. It had echoes of Eleonor Oliphant is Completely Fine, All The Lonely People and Meredith Alone. At times Clover is difficult to like, but she grew on me. She is professional at her job, yet is so closed in her real life. There is an ease to the writing style that made this a really absorbing read for me. As someone who has been afraid of death, there were some beautiful passages about death and grief, that had me reflecting on the life cycle and how we should be living our lives fully.
Thanks to @netgalley and @vikingbooks for this ARC. I’m sure this book will be well received when it’s published in July 2023.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with a copy of this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
This was a beautiful story, the author has done a wonderful job of drawing you in to their world. A fantastic read that I will be recommending to many!

This is a sweet and heartwarming read. Clover is a death doula, spending her time easing the last moments of others and helping them die with company beside them.

Clover captures the last words of the people she helps, however mundane, and collects them in three notebooks. Through the story, Clover learns more about herself, and we learn to appreciate just how much her role can mean.

I received an ARC of this book from NetgalIey. A debut novel with a most intriguing narrative line theat caught my attention instantly and yet was only a small part of the experience of reading the book. I had never heard of the term Death Doula. The idea seems a bit macabre at first but as my experience working in health services should have told me nothing about death is as macabre as we make it feel.

I LOVED this book not only for its psychological spirit and it's attention to detail about Clover's job, But also because the author wrapped up this career into a personality of such depth and variety. I adored the character of Clover and of those around her. I liked how Claudia made her see into her own life and how those other characters helped her when she was ready for that help.

The working in of Clover's love for books, the weekly trips to the bookstore, her own notebooks etc etc all formed integral parts of the narrative.

What a beautiful book. One I will certainly recommend to others

This one is much more than a pretty cover. It made me question what I want from life and what my regrets would be if I were dying now.

Clover is a death doula. She dedicates her life to helping others on their final days. Making sure they are not alone, help them navigate any unsolved issues, listening and be present.
Instead of using all the advice people would give her on their final hours and live her life more fully, she just existed. Until Claudia...

This book resonated with me in several aspects. It talks a lot about anxiety, isolation, and loneliness. The sweet balance between finding comfort when alone, not having the pressure of others; and the isolation that comes from it. It talks a lot about grief and how it affects people differently.
Was not expecting to end in a romance, but it just made the book warm and cosy despite the heavy topics.

All the characters are well developed, and I can't even pick a favourite. They just bring so much with them.

It's definitely a lovely read. I will be buying the physical copy when out. It's full of amazing quotes, and it is so easy to read. Hooked from the first chapter.

Favourite quote:
"And instead of constantly asking ourselves the question of why we’re here, maybe we should be savoring a simpler truth: We are here."

I wasn't sure if I was enjoying this book, it raised so many questions inside me about grieving for my own parents. But the characters were so lovely, and Clover so gentle, that by the end I was in love with them all. I wouldn't call this a summer beach read, but it is definitely something to read quietly, and then allow yourself to take stock of all the different emotions that have ever run through your body. Recommended.

Be cautiously reckless. I want that embroidered on my wall or on a tile, such wise words!

I know I'm not supposed to share quotes from an ARC, but I cannot imagine this being edited out. Don't we all have hopes and dreams, fears and regrets? No matter how life shaped us into who we are. It is okay to be afraid as long as you don't go numb, and let me add: it is okay not to be living the hell out of your life. Being housebound and chronically ill, there is only so much of life I can handle. But I am grateful for every day I am able to read :)

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for a copy of the book.

A good story, I just needed a bit more motivation to get it finished.

Thanks to NetGalley and to the author for giving me the chance to read and review this book.

The Collected Regrets of Clover lets us into the life of a death doula; someone who helps the dying. They don’t provide medical care, but more spiritual and emotional support for those who need it. However, Clover spends so much time with the dying, that she doesn’t really have a life of her own. She avoids getting close to people after she lost her own beloved Grandfather.

But can Clover go through life being so lonely? Or is it time to spend more time with the living than the dead?
Clover is a wonderful character; warm, caring and also very socially awkward. It was a joy to get to know her and the cast of characters, who all felt fully fleshed out and real. The novel’s pacing is good and engaging, and I just found it very well written.

I really loved this book, and I found I resonated quite a lot with it. It was a really enjoyable read and didn’t want to put it down. I find myself thinking back over it, even long after I finished it.

I found this book thought provoking, and couldn’t help but question my own thoughts and feelings about death and grief. However, it was in no way morbid, instead it was almost uplifting and hopeful.

I would definitely recommend this to book clubs as I think it would spark some incredible discussions.

Do read about Clover, you won’t regret this life affirming read.

I really thought I would love this.

Clover is a death doula working in New York City. Hers is an entirely non-medical service - she sits with people in their final days, offer them comfort, accepts their confessions, and records their regrets. I thought this could be quite upsetting to read, but actually we’re not given much insight into Clover’s career before we’re catapulted into a vapid romance with a guy she meets at a death cafe.

Although Brammer seems to have taken care to characterise Clover, there is nothing redeeming about her, and she mostly seems robotic and emotionless, particularly given her job and her reasons for doing it. I felt ashamed that I felt nothing for her, and couldn’t muster any enthusiasm for the events unfolding in front of her.

Perhaps, like people, some books just don’t come into your life at the right time.

2023 Book 14 - The Collected Regrets of Clover by Mikki Brammer

I received an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. Releases 3rd May 2023.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

It's only April, but I'm already prepared to say that if you read one book this year - make it this one.

Clover is a death doula - rather than bringing life into the world, she helps guide life gently out of it, in a dignified and compassionate manner.

She lives her life through those of her clients, and honours their biggest regrets by doing those things herself and thinking of them as she does. Clover is happy with her life - until she takes on a client who manages to unknowingly be the impetus that turns her world upside down.

This is brilliantly written, so easy to read and fall in love with the characters, and grabs you to make you listen. It has shot way up my list of favourite books already - I'll be banging on about it for a while so be prepared.

#books
#bookstagram
#mikkibrammer
#2023books
#netgalley

Uplighting and moving. Tender reading that makes you think. I found it hard at times and I had big feels but this a book that needs to be read. Will make you ponder what life is all about…

A gentle, literary wade into deep waters.

The Collected Regrets of Clover was incredibly sweet and quietly compelling. The writing had this way of
wrapping around you, like a homemade blanket or curling incense. Clover was a complex woman that I think any woman can see parts of herself in. She was shy, but defiant, curious and bold, but cautious and self conscious. I loved her complexity.

HOWEVER, as a person who’s more social and direct, I found her to be a little self righteous and borderline “I’m not like other girls”. The crazy thing is, just when I was ready to give up on her, another character calls her out on her attitude. And she has to stop and really examine herself and her life. I loved that.

All the characters have a unique and life like quality. The romance element in this story was so unique. I don’t want to give too much away, but I think the way it plays out is wonderful. You don’t have to settle and when you’re ready, the right people will find you where you are.

And finally, I love the way this book explores such a dark and difficult topic like death. The snippets of wisdom are encouraging without being patronising or trite. I felt warm and hopeful at the end, and maybe even a little less afraid of the great unknown.

I would recommend this book to anyone at a crossroads, who’s looking for light and life in unsuspecting places. A warm and pensive read that leaves you feeling like you’ve been given a long, warm hug and sent back to face the world with strength and excitement.

I enjoyed this book, it was quite thought-provoking. I do wish there had been more of a focus on the books where she collected the regrets people had, which was skimmed over mostly.