I whizzed through this book in one sitting and loved it. Telling the story of two families one a nuclear 2.4 children and married parents and one a lone parent who’s child does not live with her and how the unexpected early delivery of the second child in Kate and Andrew’s family throws Olivia into their lives. Atoning for her abandonment of her daughter Delia, Olivia becomes somewhat of an unpaid nanny to Adam and Kirsty who is born with a genetic condition so rare that it has no name.
This novel explores not just the theme of disability and how a disabled child being born can affect a family. It looks with laser focus at all aspects of relationships, romantic, familial, on what makes a family and how intergenerational trauma and mental illness affect more than just the person suffering.
To Adam Olivia is a good mother, loving and constant. To Delia she is the woman who abandoned her. To Adam Kate is no mother at all, the woman who betrayed him at age 7 but to Trixie she is the first parental figure to put her first and to care deeply for her and not just themselves.
It would be so easy to judge Kate and many readers will though fewer I suspect will judge Olivia as harshly. The narrative we are raised with is that women don’t leave their children. A patriarchal stance that demonises women for doing the very thing that thousands of men do every week.
Though I think I understand Kate’s motivations, all external rather than intrinsic I didn’t warm to her as a person but the joy of a well written novel is that you don’t have to like all the characters, you just have to believe that they are real people and Kate is definitely that. Equally, though I liked Olivia more I did find her passivity enraging at times and I could see why it was so easy for Adam to treat her as badly as he often did. And Andrew, on one hand a great father who stepped up when he was suddenly alone with his children but also we weak man who would probably not have gone the distance had Olivia not been there.
I wish we had seen more of Kirsty, after all the blurb makes it sound as if she is the central character. I found instead that while her being born with a rare disorder was a catalyst for what happened 5 years later, we never really got to know her. The pages where she makes the sign for horse brought a lump to my throat and I’d love to have seen the journey to Makaton ‘speech’ either as it happened or by using excerpts from Andrews book.
But that doesn’t change me giving this book a very well deserved 4.5 ⭐️

"In years to come, when she recognised this party as the last day of her old life, Kate would play a game with herself, trying to count the people who'd been there."

This is a searingly evocative and personal novel about a what family truly means. Now, to quickly preface this the author has addressed that she has loved ones with profound disabilities and this story is an exploration into how people misunderstand and mistreat them, and the complicated way disabled people fit into a world not designed for them. As a disabled person myself, I found this story to deal with some painfully difficult subjects but with tenderness and grace, and I understood the difficulties some people may encounter by loving me, or Kirsty. It was nuanced and delicate, but it definitely hit hard.

Kate was a conflicting and complicated main character — I hated her for abandoning her entire family because she didn’t want to deal with her daughter, but at the same time I deeply felt every emotion she did as she started to realise the magnitude of what she’d done and the guilt and regret started to creep in. There was a strange, unwelcome empathy for her as we look back and see maybe it’s not so simple. And Andrew resonated deeply with me, someone angry and frustrated who didn’t make good choices but under it all who just wanted to love their child and for the world to see them for themselves, not their disability. Every other character who finds their life changed by Kirsty in different ways, each of them have their own story, their own trajectory that is unfolding.

The story spans two decades, and moves slowly through the years — giving us little moments that individually might seem insignificant but weave together to make a picture of a life, a family. Weaving between their lives before and after, their new and old lives we see what’s changed — and what’s stayed the same. Every person develops and grows as the pages turn, showing us the network of people who get involved and affected by the decisions made years ago.

An extraordinary moving and sweeping story that has the ability to break your heart and build it back piece by piece.

Unfortunately I found this book hard going, not because of the distressing subject matter, but because I could not relate to any of the characters and the jumping from one to another, back and forth in time, meant the narrative did not flow. At the half way point, with little desire to see it through to the end, I set it aside.

This book connected with me on a personal level. It was like I could have written this book myself.

Kate and Andrew touched me but how a woman can walk out of her children I don't know. Suddenly finding themselves thrown together, Kate must face her past and all the guilt she has.

A stunning moving book by Claire. This one touched me as it could easily be me.

This is the story of a family split in two. When their baby is born severely disabled a family is tested (they experience everything from grief, to helplessness to anger.) Eventually the mother leaves and ends up living in LA with a seemingly glamorous life from the outside while her husband is left to raise 2 children but their paths re-cross 15 years later when the family’s story is optioned to be made into a film.

The author provided a note at the start of the novel; some of the themes had been experienced by them and their family, they have a severely disabled family member. I hope this wasn’t included in case anyone was offended by the story. I took it as a hint at what I found in the pages- real emotion, real and sometimes conflicting feelings.

I won’t easily forget the cast of characters here- which I didn’t always like. They sometimes frustrated me. I wanted to shake them. I was sad for them- and, at times, happy for them. The writing weaves between time and place and in other books I’ve found that jarring and sometimes spoils the pace of the book or the flow but not here.

I loved it. It’s going to be a book club favourite.

This was an interesting and moving insight into the complicated personal lives of people with disabilities, and their families. In order to cram in so many dimensions, though, the book was rushed and the storylines contrived and too convenient.

Firstly, thank you to Netgallery, Little, Brown Book Group UK and Claire McGowan for the ARC of this book in return for an honest review.

This book was beautifully written which was very moving to read. It’s has a unique storyline and it had some very emotive topics throughout which were handle very well considering the delicate nature. As someone who works with children with learning disabilities on a daily basis I feel like I could relate to this book another fantastic book by Claire McGowan.

My mum taught children with physical, mental and learning disabilities for nearly twenty years, and so I was bought up with children that could be seen as 'different' and so disability was never a big thing for me, whereas I am aware it might still be a shock to some. And its true that raising a severely disabled child is difficult, physically and emotionally. It affects every part of your life. Which is why I understand why Kate does what she does in this book. I'm not saying I agree with her walking out on her family, but I wouldn't judge as I understand what it's like to be pushed to, and over, your limits.

Having said that, I didn't like Kate that much as a character. I didn't judge her decision, no, but I felt she was a bit whiney at times, playing the victim too much. The character of Olivia I went to and fro with, but overall I liked her. She puts her own life on hold to keep Kate's afloat. I liked Andrew the most. He got the 'bum deal' so to speak and it was hard for him, but I definitely felt more compassion for him.

There is so much honest there that you can tell Claire has life experience with disability. It shows disability - and parenthood on the whole - to be difficult, ugly, complicated, exhausting. Parents of non-disabled children struggle, let alone those with severely disabled children. It also shows that compassion runs out. Be it for your kin, your friends, your family, and yourself. It's important to remember that you're still human. People often say that you only get what you can cope with. But wat happens if you can't cope? There's no shame in admitting that you can't cope. Okay, so Kate did it in an extreme way, but the bottom line is, you're no weaker if you admit you need help

I liked how the story was played through various viewpoints across several years. Kate leaving the family didn't just affect her: it affected her son Adam (brilliant character creation), her daughter Kirsty, who whilst at first may not understand what's happening, the sudden lack of a parent will obviously affect her, and her friend Olivia, who at times feels a bit of a martyr but equally a bit like a superhero. And by following them through the years, we see how that abandonment has affected them, and still affects them, and their decisions, 15 years later.

I felt the depictions of Kirsty and her disability were good. It could have gone a bit over-the-top, a bit like a caricature of what we think a disabled person looks and acts like. But it felt very real. Maybe because I've grown up around children with disabilities, but that felt spot on for me.

It is a very honest book. A lot of the time we tend to sugar-coat the hardships that come with disability by saying things like, "but I still love her", "she's still my daughter", "people have it worse" etc. And whilst that may be true, it doesn't negate the difficulties. Anyone with experience will know it's not always easy, and it's messy, and this shows all of that in an unapologetic, raw, honest which which I applaud. I don't think I've read that in fiction before.

It really makes you think...if you knew your chid was going to be this affected, would you continue with the pregnancy? Would you still love a child that takes up so much of your life? Could you love them as much as your other children? They're not easy questions to think about, but I think they're going to be amongst the many asked at book clubs, where this book will definitely be a top choice.

There were a few bits I would have liked explored a bit more, or to be developed a bit more, such as the Adam/Delia and Olivia/Delia storylines, as well as the confrontation between Kate and her family, but they weren't major things, and overall I thought it was very well written and a good story.

It's thought-provoking, heart-warming, heart wrenching, uplifting, and emotional. A rollercoaster full of emotions that may even see you shed a tear or two.

This was my first Claire McGowan book, but definitely not my last. If she writes with this much heart in her other books then they're definitely worth a read.

‘This Could Be Us’ tells the story of Andrew and Kate and what happens after their second child, Kirsty, is born with a disability so rare that it doesn’t even have a name. All they know is that she will never go through the usual developmental stages of childhood; in fact, she will never be more than a helpless baby in a gradually ageing body.
As Claire McGowan shows us, this is tough on any number of levels. Kate is so sad, so angry, and so cross with everyone. Bravely, McGowan does not make her a likeable character; she resents her husband’s daily escape to the world of work (and why shouldn’t she?), she relies too much on the good nature of her friend, Olivia, and she finds it difficult to show warmth to her children. Eventually, it’s all too much for her and she leaves.
However, whilst most readers will not necessarily like Kate, McGowan makes it very difficult for us to judge her. The author’s depiction of her left-behind son, Adam, is wholly believable and reminds us that he suffers just as much as his parents in his own way. And yet there is never any doubt that he and his father love Kirsty. McGowan shows us carefully and respectfully that caring for someone profoundly disabled is repetitive, messy and exhausting, and that, for some, the pit of compassion is not bottomless. Perhaps her nuanced, sensitive portrayal comes, in part, from knowing something of this life. In the Acknowledgements she thanks her family for permission to write about this subject, stating that, ‘…the feelings contained within are certainly inspired by real events.’
There are moments when coincidences needed for plot development are a little too neat and, to my mind, the character of Olivia is not entirely credible, whilst that of her daughter is under-developed. However, all in all, this was a moving and thought-provoking read, made all the stronger in the final stages of the novel through its lack of certainties.
My thanks to NetGalley and Little Brown Book Group UK for a copy of this book in exchange for a fair review.

I’ve been in a bit of a reading slump and this is the book that has pulled me out of it!

I’ve read a few of Claire’s books and once again this did not disappoint.

It’s a unique storyline and it has some very emotive topics throughout. It’s handling very delicate subjects well and I’m sure a lot of parents can relate to how Kate was feeling (even if you don’t have disabled children).

I was eager to know more and get to the end and I really liked how the story was told through different characters perspectives and past and present.

I really, really felt for Kate. I know she could have been seen as the ‘villain’ to some people but for me, my heart completely went out to her. She was struggling, drowning! And she couldn’t pull herself back out.

Overall it was a good, heartbreaking story which kept me hooked throughout. Thank you for getting me out of my reading slump!

Thank you NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book.

This was personally a very difficult book to read. It followed a sensitive topic but it was executed so tenderly. I was highly impressed with the content.

I wasn't far into this book before I was thinking how it would be excellent for discussing at book clubs... and then a few pages later, there were tears in my eyes.
It feels very honest about living with someone with a severe disability, and it's has some very emotional scenes.
It also has a lot of family drama going on. A LOT.
It was a one sit read for me.
Split over timelines and characters, it always leaves you wanting to know more.
Very well done.

Not my usual type of book but I gave it a go and I’m glad I did, had me interested until the very last page, I quite enjoyed it and look forward to reading more