Ben De Backer is kicked out of their family home when they come out to their parents as nonbinary. With no other options, Ben calls their older sister, Hannah, who they haven't seen or spoken to in years.
Hannah and her husband, Thomas, who Ben has never met, let Ben move into their home, and to finish off the rest of senior year at the school where Thomas teaches.
Ben just wants to keep their head down and not draw attention, but a fellow student called Nathan seems determined to befriend them.

I had heard good things about this book, so I was excited to read it.
The book throws the reader straight into the deep end, with Ben being thrown out of their home right at the very start. I found this jarring, as I hadn't had time to get to know Ben, but that may have been the author's intention.
Ben was a likeable and relatable protagonist for the most part - while I did empathise with them, and knew that I couldn't even begin to know what they were going through, I did find the self-pity a bit annoying at times.
I liked the supporting characters and the relationships that Ben developed.
The plot was interesting and held my attention. However, I felt that from the beginning, I was never fully immersed or invested in what happened, which I think was down to the jarring opening.
I can see this being a very important book to a lot of people, and it is certainly an important topic, it just didn't hit home for me, unfortunately.

Overall, this was an enjoyable read.

I've followed Mason online for a while and this was everything I ever wanted and more. It was written so beautifully and I just loved all of the representation it included

This book has my heart both flying and dying, it was heartwarming and heartbreaking in equal measure. I loved it

This is both a love story, and a story of coming out. I Wish You All the Best has some beautiful moments of levity and romance, but also dark honesty around the difficulty of growing up with parents who refuse to accept who their child is.

A couple of friend of mine were kicked off or had serious issues when they came out. It's more than three decade and it was hard to read a contemporary story that talks about a similar experience.
Ben is not the most likeable character but I don't think you're a happy camper when you parents kick you out.
It's a good story and it's a story that will surely be relevant for some people.
Well plotted and poignant.
Recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher for this arc, all opinions are mine

I feel very torn reviewing this book. Do I think the subject matter is important? Yes. Did I enjoy some elements of the book? Yes. But I spent most of my time reading it feeling incredibly frustrated with Ben and I worry that they aren’t a great example to younger readers of how to navigate anxiety and depression.

Put simply, I just found Ben very annoying and whiny, and it was difficult to understand why Mariam or Nathan were devoting so much time to supporting them in very one-sided friendships. While it’s very valid to ask for and expect support with mental health struggles from your friends, it needs to be reciprocal and at no point did I feel like Ben was interested in understanding Nathan’s experiences or supporting him; only in what Nathan could do for them. Likewise, I couldn’t understand why Mariam - an enby vlogger and public speaker - would have such a strong friendship with a high school kid (while on the subject of Mariam, the gap between publication in the US and the U.K. really showed in the passage where Mariam talks about being a massive Harry Potter fan and visiting HP World: it’s hard to imagine anyone from the non-binary or trans community doing so in 2023!).

Meanwhile Ben’s sister, Hannah, was nothing short of saintly - with endless patience for Ben - but we’re meant to side with Ben when they’re angry that Hannah (who, let’s remember, was the same age when she left home as Ben is now, and Ben can’t get it together enough to do virtually anything for the entire book) “abandoned” Ben when she went to college. Like, I got why Ben felt that way because they were only a kid, but the therapist and Hannah both act like it would have been totally reasonable for an 18 year old to take their 8 year old sibling to college with them.

I guess my TLDR is: liked the concept, loved the character of Nathan, justice for Hannah, and I wanted to yeet Ben out of a window. Overall 3 stars.

I Wish You All the Best is an engaging and honest exploration of the life of teenager Ben De Backer as he deals with the consequences of outing himself as non-binary to his parents. The text allows for an honest voice to be heard, conveying an authentic, complicated, messy story to unfold - warts and all.

The De Backer family dynamic is central to the events of the novel and Deaver handles this beautifully, never seeming to judge individuals' actions too harshly but allowing the reader to 'live' the life of Ben as he confronts the emotional turmoil, for good or ill.

Deaver carefully navigates the line between being 'preachy' or 'woke' deftly, drawing you in and enveloping you in, to what is ultimately a love story of self, family and friendship. Highly recommend.

I think you can tell by reading other reviews, that this book has a profound effect on people who have really been in the protagonist's shoes, or somewhere similar. I'm glad to see that even people who don't necessarily connect fully, still appreciate how important this book is.

Suffice to say, as a queer trans non-binary person who was diagnosed with depression & anxiety as a teen (though later discovered to be undiagnosed AuDHD), but who is NOT out to their parents at past 30+ years old, this book shot me straight through the heart. Similar to Ben, I figured myself out pretty late, so not having that typical "non-binary look" (which sadly is also rooted in racism and fatphobia), I struggle with gender & body dysmorphia, and even now am in the process of trying to figure out how I want to present, so all of those moments in the book as Ben slowly opens up themselves to putting their feelings and needs first, were just beautiful and so relatable.

I swear, read this book in one sitting yesterday evening, finished at 2am with sore eyes, and spent my hour therapy session today talking about it. My parents aren't like Ben's thankfully (honestly they're amazing in so may ways), but Ben's journey and their parents' reaction to their coming out plays on those insecurities I have, and was so brutally and honestly written, it was emotional. It was great to see mental health, therapy, and medication being explored and not demonised. I loved the exploration of art and how Ben gets to express themself through painting, even how critical they were of their own work (also as an art student myself haha see why I enjoyed the book so much yet?).

I can understand other reviewers touching on some of the characters not being fully fleshed out, but I don't remember thinking that as I was reading. I think it's a very open, raw story that takes you right back to that difficult late-teen time, but with the added trauma of what Ben experiences. Some reviewers have made odd comments about Mariam and Ben's friendship due to the age difference, but I don't really get why, as there was nothing untoward about their relationship - it spoke to me of how much seeing someone living the life that speaks to you can mean to younger people still trying to figure themselves out.

Nathan was a ray of sunshine of course, and possibly had more patience than any teen I remember, but their friendship and blossoming romance was lovely to read. I found one reviewer's comment about how some of Ben's actions towards their friends made them "rude and unlikable" at times, despite acknowledging what they were going through, and I found this really interesting - like you can literally be struggling with depression and your own grief and trauma, but you still need to be completely lovable as a main character? Speaking as someone who's been there, Ben's reaction and emotions felt true to life and understandable, and for them to behave in any other way would have been unrealistic, in my own opinion.

I feel like I could go on about this book forever, sorry. In short, it's a beautiful, emotional queer teen story of living and loving through trauma, and trying to allow yourself the space to breathe and just be in this world, despite what everyone else wants for you. This is the book every teen should get the chance to read, whether they see themselves in it or not, because every child deserves the space to live happily and be understood, and loved.

I Wish You All The Best is a complex yet powerful coming of age story of acceptance, friendship and love which is equal parts heart-warming and heart-breaking. Mason Deaver has a truly beautiful writing style which is so engaging yet easy to read. I was astounded to read that it was their debut work and really look forward to seeing more from them in the future because they truly are one of the current standout authors, particularly within queer fiction.
Ben was an incredible protagonist who I didn’t feel ready to part with when the story came to a close. Nathan is just joy personified in a character and the unconditional acceptance Ben receives from the entire friendship group was incredibly heart-warming. The slow burn romance between Ben and Nathan was truly beautiful and the scenes on Nathan’s rooftop were some of the best romantic scenes I’ve read in a long time. Also, the scene where Ben comes out to Nathan was particularly powerful and Nathan’s immediate apology for having unknowingly misgendered Ben so many times just melted my heart.
I Wish You All The Best has strong mental health representation through it’s authentic portrayal of Ben’s experiences of anxiety, panic attacks and depression. I also enjoyed the positive portrayal of therapy, particularly seeing Ben’s initial resistance to attending the sessions grow into appreciation of the positive impact talking to an impartial person can have.
Through reading I Wish You All The Best I feel I’ve learnt so much about non-binary experiences, therefore enabling me to be a better ally. Ben’s story has made me consider things I previously wouldn’t have as a cisgender person, such as how commonly used terms of endearment for friends and siblings are gendered. The intolerance and prejudice shown by Ben’s parents was a heart-breaking and difficult read but it’s so important that we don’t shy away from these stories.
Overall, I Wish You All The Best is a powerful truly ground-breaking story that I think everyone should read at least once. It’s going to be particularly impactful for both members of the LGBTQIA+ community and those who want to become better allies. I was so delighted to hear that the book is being adapted into a film and I’m really excited by the casting and the opportunity to see Ben’s story portrayed on the big screen.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5

I have posted an extended review on my blog www.yourschloe.co.uk and the post is linked.

This book was equal parts heart-breaking and heart-warming. The fact Ben's parents were so unsupportive (and that's putting it lightly, I can't think of a stronger word) was awful, and seeing what that does to a kid was really upsetting. Seeing them be able to overcome it though with the help of good people (and some therapy), the new relationships they built with their sister and new friends was lovely though and I think would give a lot of hope to any kids going through something similar, or even kids who are maybe feeling the same way about themselves but don't know what it is yet.
I like the fact that it acknowledged that when people who they're not out to misgender them, whilst it may be a little uncomfortable, they can't be mad at them because they don't know. (But obviously people you are out to who refuse to use the right pronouns you absoutely can be mad at.) I know a lot of people especially nowadays would probably say everyone should just always ask everyone which pronouns they should use but either way I don't think that would have been good for Ben in this case since they didn't want to be out to everyone yet. If one of Ben's school friends had asked for their pronouns they'd have been stuck between having to do the awful thing of lie and say he/him so that no one knew they were non-binary or being honest, saying they/them and coming out when they didn't want to and opening themselves up to rejection again.
I also learnt a fair bit, for example Ben was asked for their opinions on being called gendered terms like 'bro' and 'dude'. I would have assumed bro was not wanted, being so obviously 'male sibling', but I wouldn't have thought twice about calling a non-binary person 'dude' since I use it for any gender normally (and Ben does say that it's gender-neutral enough for some people but they just don't want it).
This was definitely an important book, and as upsetting as it was, I think overall it was a beautiful story and I loved the relationships Ben had with each of the different people in their new life, and loved Nathan. I'd recommend it to anyone, whether you're part of the LGBT+ community or not.

Thank you for MacMillan and Netgalley for this advanced copy.

I've read this book before. A year ago. And this book still gave me those damn feelings. Mason Deaver was such a great writer. Deaver could make a beautiful heartbroken story. I haven't read their novella and hoping I could read it this year.

First of all: wow. It has been a long time since a book made me feel so many different emotions, but my god this one did just that! I felt anger, happiness, sadness, helplessness, and so much more.
This is one of those books that everyone needs to read, it's a book that I imagine so many people within the LGBTQIA+ community needs, especially those who are young or just starting on their journey of finding their identity and feeling all the anxieties that come along with that.
While this book is ultimately happy, it still touches on some difficult issues that so many people face, and I think this was done through first hand experience.
I will be recommending this book to anyone that will listen!

i liked the plot, storyline and some of the character dynamics. I think Nathan, Hannah and Thomas we my favourite characters to see more of. I did read this book pretty quickly because I wanted to know what happened next, and the themes are important but sad and can be triggering to others.
I found a lot of the writing a little bit odd, grammatically and some phrasing chosen.... there were a lot of strange choices made that made reading more difficult. It was also pretty long, I think there were sections that could have been cut down more. I also found it a bit weird the MC (who is 18 a senior in high school) considered an adult their best friend, it just sat uncomfortably with me to read particularly when the MC says they'd been friends for a year and half so since they were 16 and a half ish, maybe closer to 17. I also didn't feel like the therapist spoke like a therapist in her 40s lol.
i dont think there was anything inherently problematic, and I think it is written with the audience in mind. just some of the above feedback is why i dropped my own rating down a couple stars as it affected my experience of reading. (also for context, i love reading YA and i especially love and LOOK FOR when YA novels have clearly written for a teen audience, that is not a negative to me at all and I do feel like this book did that)

I had mixed feelings about this one.

On the one hand, there aren't enough books with nonbinary protagonists, so that was a point in its favour right from the start. I especially liked that Ben is amab, because it feels like portrayals of afab nonbinary people are more common, and can contribute to popular ideas that nonbinary people are somehow "women lite". Moreover, although this story starts and ends with coming out -- disastrously at the start of the book, to Ben's parents, and more happily at the end, to their friends and crush -- this isn't a 'coming out story' in the sense of focusing on Ben discovering their identity and gradually learning who they are. They already know that when we meet them, and it's how to navigate the world going forward that they're trying to figure out.

Having been rejected by their parents, Ben moves back in with his estranged sister. I felt this relationship could have been explored a little more. Ben's feelings towards their sister as a result of the estrangement become more prominent as the book goes on, but earlier on, the intricacies of the relationship are somewhat sidelined. It felt plausible for adult siblings getting back in touch after ten years, but Ben would have been eight when their sister left, and that's a huge gulf in a young person's life, so it seemed a little too easy for them to slip back into each other's lives. I really liked, however, that their sister was trying her best but still wasn't perfect, sometimes overstepping the mark when it came to trying to protect Ben, and inflaming situations with their parents.

The aspect of the book that didn't quite resonate with me as much as I'd have liked was the portrayal of mental health and anxiety. Not in the sense of symptoms -- that felt perfectly real -- but it was quite a simplistic portrayal of how anxiety might develop and how therapy and medication might help. Although it's important to destigmatise taking psychiatric medication, the way that medication was presented as a simple option to Ben felt a little carelessly handled. There was also a moment where Ben's therapist equated asexuality and aromanticism with touch aversion, when these have nothing to do with each other. Some ace people might also experience touch aversion if they're trying to force themselves into situations they don't want to be in, but as orientations, asexuality and aromanticism are about lack of *attraction*; they're not defined by actions. (For example, not all asexual people are sex-repulsed. Some have and enjoy sex, they just don't experience sexual attraction.) Coming from a character who was supposed to be reasonably expert at working with LGBTQ characters, this was jarring, and I worry it would mislead readers who aren't so familiar with those identities.

Overall, I would have liked to see the anxiety elements explored with more nuance, perhaps giving Ben the opportunity to explore their mental health through their art more. However, I really liked the descriptions of art in the book; I am a sucker for a good description of art, even though I myself can't draw at all. And I also liked the portrayal of friendship, both online and in-person, and the gradually developing romance. So, all in all, a slightly mixed read for me.

Great, important book. It really hurt me to read about MC's situation but I am aware this is not a work of fiction: I mean, situations like that happen. Every day. It is so good a book like that was written for everyone's benefit.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for this eARC of 'I Wish You All the Best' by Mason Deaver.

Mason Deaver's 'I Wish You All the Best' has been on my radar for almost 3 years now but the UK never had its own edition so I simmered and waited for a while. And it was definitely worth it. Insightful, heartfelt and truthful while remaining beautiful and real. Mason Deaver's writing style is an absolute delight to read and I am excited, to say the least, to read more work by them whenever the day comes. Read this book please, it is a MUST HAVE.

Thank you to NetGalley, Macmillan and Mason Deaver for providing me with a copy of I Wish You All the Best for review. What a great book. This book is emotional as all hell.

Benji is a great MC, you know when you just care sooo much for someone after a trauma and you want everything to go smoothing for them with pretty much all of your heart. That was me for Benji. Unfortunately, things don't always go smoothly for a YA MC, well because then their is no story! I groaned at some of their decisions, I was overjoyed by some of their moments of connection and I wanted to see and feel their art and self-expression.

I have previously read The Feeling of Falling in Love by Mason Deaver with a MC that was pretty infuriating for 50% of the book. Not this one. Your heart breaks for Benji, probably in the first chapter, and from there you are latched onto their journey of healing and self-expression.

Also like how the hell does something like Nathaniel exist? The phrase 'too good for this world' comes to mind. Sooo much love for him.

This book was my second book in my #Transrightsreadathon experience. Thank you for a wonderful story for this journey. Will post to socials closer to release date - 13 April 2023.

I really wanted to love this book more, especially as I think it's such an important topic for a YA book, and I do think that it will be important for people, even if I didn't enjoy it.
Mostly, my issues lie with the character development throughout the novel, as most of the characters feel very one-dimensional and underdeveloped. We know little about Nathan or his motivations, despite Ben quickly developing strong feelings for him, and even Ben's parents are not really explored in much depth, even though their relationship is central to the driving force of the story.
I also found Ben themselves to be quite unlikeable. Again, they had very little development above surface level, and though I think the representation of mental illness was good, I do also think they suffered at times from being slightly standoffish. Though I know they are dealing with many issues and working through mental illness throughout the course of the novel, there were points where I found their behaviour towards their friends to be rude and unlikeable. I didn't love them as a protagonist, and for me this was where most of the issues hinged.
I nevertheless think this is an important novel, for the representation, if nothing else.

what an excellent story- this one has me welling up, feeling so angry, and blushing at the cute-factor!

i had two favourite things about this book:
1- we don’t choose our family- we follow our main character as they are thrown out of their home after coming out as NB. at a very isolating time, they are surrounded by loving individuals in the form of internet friends, family and IRL friends who show them they deserve to be loved.

2- it’s okay to remove people from your life who don’t make you happy. for a long time our MC thinks they couldn’t possibly cut contact with their parents, but with time, they know it’s what they need to do.

one of my new favourite YA books!

Thank you to Macmillan and Netgalley for providing me with free and advanced access to this book. This has not affected my opinions in any way.

I can't even begin to describe the love I have for this book. The characters felt like my closest friends and I was just living inside the novel; this book really allowed me to escape away. I was feeling all the emotions with the characters, and it just feels like such an important book.

I also learnt a lot about being non-binary and what it entails, especially with what that can mean for relationships. I think this is a part of the queer community that in YA and literature in general is very underrepresented, and this is a queer love story that needs to be told.

The author does such a fantastic job of stringing the story together, of making you care, of making you just FEEL so much. It's been a journey to go through this book with these characters, and I truly felt a part of this world.

The main character, Ben, is so well written. I love how we really get to see their insecurities, their problems, and they just feels so real to me. They feel like they have a part of so many of the people I know, if that makes sense, and I just felt like none of the emotions were over-exaggerated or not put forward enough. This book hits such a sweet spot for me.

The friendships and relationships Ben builds take time, and I love that. We see a real growth in their character, and that could only be possible thanks to therapy. The way that therapy is portrayed in this book in such a positive light and as such a powerful tool, was really special and important to see.

I love the relationship that Ben has with their art teacher, and the one they build with their sister, Hannah. I think these were so well crafted and made Ben such a well rounded character.

The whole friendship group is just such a joy. Their jokes and their unconditional acceptance made for a truly memorable group. I do not think there will be a sequel but if there ever is one, I will be the first one on Netgalley requesting it and praying it's accepted. I want more of these characters; I didn't want to leave them!

How have I gone through the bulk of the review without mentioning Nathan Allan, I don't know. He is the absolute sweetest, and the romance element of this story is just so beautiful. I love the rooftop setting for a certain scene (if you know, you know), and the whole way that he builds this friendship with Ben, the way that he insists on being their friend, even when Ben themselves does not really want to be friends.

This is another ARC that I will seriously consider buying for myself, it's such an exceptional story, that deserves to be told in so many ways. It was (I believe) the first non-binary romance I have read, and that feels momentous. Thank you for this story.

**** MY REVIEW WILL BE POSTED ON APRIL 1st WITH THIS LINK https://zbestbooks.blogspot.com/2023/03/arc-i-wish-you-all-best-by-mason-deaver.html ****