I wanted to read this book after reading a wonderful article by Tracy in The Guardian about the death of her father, who was killed when she was just 12 years old. It referred to the book and I thought it would be interesting and if the style of the article was anything to go by, a very well written book. Learning To Think was everything I was anticipating and so much more. I like to read autobiographies which are about ‘normal’ people (as opposed to ‘famous’ people) who have had something extraordinary happen in their lives. Tracy is such a person.
She had a relatively ordinary working class upbringing, with some extraordinary occurrences (I won’t note those as they are for the reader to find out). Then, at the age of 12, her world is turned upside down when her father is killed. He was only 44 years old.
I loved how the title of the book, Learning To Think, is derived (again, I will not state this, as it is such an important part of the book I would not want to spoil it for the reader).
Highly recommend this book.
I wish Tracy and her family all of the very best for the future. Remarkable women.
Thanks to NetGalley, the author and the publisher for a Kindle copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

It's always difficult to review a memoir as they're so personal. There were parts I really connected with and parts that left me a little flat. I resonated with the poverty that Tracy sent through with her family and though tough I felt the nostalgia and love she felt for her family.

It really opened my eyes to how stupid social services were in the 80s and how people just didn't know what to do with trauma.

Some of the book - the religion, the friendships and Tracy's deep connection with her mum felt like they could have been touched on in a deeper sense.

Thank you to NetGalley for the arc of this powerful and heartbreaking memoir. Tracey deeply explains her childhood, growing up in poverty on a council estate. They tried everything in their power to keep the family afloat whilst each going through trauma individually.

This memoir really showed how little help there was towards children in need and how punishing children for their mental health struggles is the last thing that should be done. Tracey beautifully described how her thoughts matured as she grew up, but also explained why she thought those things as a young child. The book touches on so much and is a powerful testament to Tracy and the King families life. A heartbreaking life story that is powerful for everyone to read and understand how families in poverty really lived and how the UK community came together, or didn't, in times of struggles.

This astonishing and brave memoir held me from the first page. Tracy King recounts her childhood experiences - her alcoholic father, unable to keep a job, her agoraphobic mother and a forced move to a council house in a new suburb away from close family. Money always tight yet a close family bond between her, her sister and their parents, even when her mother becomes increasing obsessed with religion and her sister is sent to a boarding school.
When her father dies suddenly in a seemingly violent attack by a local boy, her world shatters. Tracy and her mother become co-dependent and Tracy struggles to stay in school, cutting the one lifeline that might give her a better future.
This is a heartbreaking memoir, and also deeply shocking to find how a family can fall between the cracks in society so easily. When they do start to thrive it is more through luck; a determined therapist or a change in education.
As Tracy uses adult education to develop herself she also looks back on the events of her father’s death - shockingly it was not as she had been given to understand and she is forced to re-evaluate her family and her childhood once more.

"The more oppressed you feel, the more you turn to your community...you realise you can only be truly understood by the church."

This was a complex and hard-hitting book primarily structured around the traumatic circumstances surrounding the author's father's death, and the other factors in her life affecting her childhood such as her born-again Christian faith. Personally, due to my own religious leanings and experiences, King's searching look at the power of organised religion was the most fascinating part of this book. In the vein of [book:Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit|15055], the reader learns how even a small religious community can exert great influence, for better or for worse, and what this might look like for a child who hadn't known anything different.
My only critique is that as we reached King's later adolescence and her foray into the thinking of spiritualism, there was less and less detail in comparison to the discussions of the church in the first-half. It would have perhaps been interesting to see more of a comparison there.
A very interesting life-story, with powerful messages about class and community in the UK.

Tracy King writes so eloquently about a life time of trauma that it seems unbelievable that this could have happened to one person. What is incredibly believable is the effect that poverty had on her family, and her excellent way of threading her story with the fact that a child in a middle class family would have been treated very differently to how her and her sister were treated. Learning to Think shows how a normal family life can easily descend into complete chaos when the circumstances allow it. I read a lot of memoir, and I must admit that this one was very hard going at times, but having finished it, I would highly recommend.

This is a book with an unusual opening chapter in that the author Tracy King, aged 12, is being exorcised of demons by two male members of her church. It seems to work and then she introduces the reader is introduced to her family; the Kings. Mike and Jackie, her parents and her older sister Emily. They were a working class family based in the Midlands around Birmingham. Tracy remembers her childhood as being happy despite her parents experiencing money worries and debt. The house that they had worked so hard to buy was repossessed and they ended up living on a council estate. Jackie became agoraphobic although she did manage to break free of it in later life. Mike worked abroad in Saudi Arabia and became an alcoholic. But he did try and control it and attend Alcoholics Anonymous. They encouraged both of their daughters although they became school refusers after being bullied. There were books in the household, games and in 1979 they also had computers. Mike was an engineer and loved to set them logic puzzles. He was trying to set up his own business despite money being tight. Tracy paints a vivid picture of hiding from the ‘tally man’ when credit payments are due.
And then Jackie is approached on the street by a local born again Christian and the family become converted into a religious way of life, even Mike. They all undergo baptism and the church becomes central to their lives. And then came the cataclysmic event that changed everything – the death of Mike at 44 and its aftermath.
This was a fascinating story to read as the author writes so well about working class life and how poverty or even ‘just getting by’ can limit life chances by making ambitions almost inaccessible. Other people make decisions for you as when Social Services take Emily at almost twelve against her will into a psychiatric hospital for refusing school. She then goes into a boarding school and lives a different life from the rest of the family. The charity football match in aid of a fund for Mike that the family knows nothing about and no hope of rehousing after Mike’s death. They just have to go on living on the estate. It’s the lack of control in working class lives that can be difficult.
At 16, Tracy decides to have no more ‘school or the church’ and embarks on further education. She and her sister were obviously determined to rise above their limitations and the title of the book refers to her learning to think for herself. In a second hand bookshop she finds a copy of Carl Sagan, ‘The Demon Haunted world’ and she uses it to make sense of the world and what has happened. She had already tried religion, the supernatural and conspiracy theories. None of them had given her the answers that she was looking for.
Then she makes her boldest decision in Chapters 26-27 when she decides to find out what really happened to Mike on that fateful evening. Tracy soon finds out that the version of events that the family were given were not correct and that she didn’t know everything about her father. This was the most powerful part of the book for me as I thought that it was such a brave decision to make and I could understand her wish to at last know everything.
I would have liked a line or two about Jackie and Emily’s current lives but perhaps they did not want to be included. But this was a powerful, uplifting memoir as I come from the same background and as Nile Rogers once put it ‘I’ve been swimming upstream all my life.’
My thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for an ARC.

This is a strange one to review as it’s a memoir. Tracy is from a council estate but has aspirations. Her family are outwardly poor but inwardly very rich. The parents Mick and Jackie protect the girls from the big bad world until one day it intrudes. Tracy has to deal with a trauma and its consequences on her sister and mother for many years. They become more religious, the girls don’t attend school - in general life becomes chaotic. Tracy tries to make sense of her world by questioning everything and this leads her in later life to question the truth behind her trauma. She discovered ‘ critical thinking’ and uses it to make more sense of her parents, her childhood and her upbringing. I don’t think there’s anything revelatory in the memoir, many of us have similar backgrounds. Her ability to write it all down, I hope, has been cathartic. Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for a prepublication ebook.

This is a carefully written, sharply observed, and often heartwarming book. I agree fiercely with King’s statement in the epilogue: “I’ve had an unreasonably complicated life and I’m asking a lot of the reader to trust me that, yes, all this happened and, no, trauma like mine is not that rare. What is rare is that someone like me has an opportunity to tell her story.” It is a memoir that addresses a multitude of topics, but overwhelmingly poverty, grief, memory, and truth. Interesting, sad, infuriating, and informative, my only criticism is that it’s perhaps overly-long, with quite a bit of repetition and rumination. I am also slightly skeptical of parts, but no more than of any other memoir - especially one written by someone whose lived experience is very different from my own. Would recommend!

I really enjoyed this incredible memoir.

Tracy King grew up in an ordinary council estate outside Birmingham, a house filled with creativity, curiosity and love, but marked by her father’s alcoholism and her mother’s agoraphobia.
By the time Tracy turns twelve her father is killed, her sister taken into care and her mother ensnared by the promises of born again christianity.
This is the story of an ordinary family trapped by a broken system, a story that could happen to anyone without the tools to transform their circumstances and it’s the story of how Tracy found her way out.

Learning to Think is beautifully written, even with its difficult subjects, it doesn’t make it difficult to read. The love within the family just leaps off the pages. It’s emotional, it’s raw, it’s gut wrenching and it pulls at your heartstrings. It made me smile and it made me cry.
A heartfelt, moving memoir about family, poverty, mental health, education, trauma, religion, memories, seeking the truth and hope.
Definitely recommend if you enjoy reading non fiction/memoirs. It’s well worth reading.

With thanks to #NetGallery #RandomHouseUK @TransworldPublishers for an arc of #LearningToThink in exchange for a honest review. And to @Tracyking for sharing her story.
Book publishes 7 March 2024.

I feel guilty for not rating this book with a higher number of stars, because I respect the author’s willingness to critically analyse the events of her childhood and her beliefs. It’s a brave book and she’s clearly a courageous, empathetic and clear-sighted person.
Unfortunately, it just didn’t grip me. From the blurb I was expecting something more like Tara Westover’s Educated, but the first part of the book just read like a description of normal life to me, having spent part of my formative years on a council estate. I couldn’t help feeling that the author’s style was a tad hectoring. By the time I finished the book I was glad to put it down, as if an interesting but slightly over-long lecture had ended.

Tracy King talks about her life growing up in poverty, in a new council estate in Birmingham, where everything you need is on the estate. Her older sister develops a school phobia, and is eventually sent away to boarding school, her mother becomes a member of an extreme church and her father is murdered. I did stop reading a short way in, as I found the book too depressing, but came back to it after a short break, and I’m glad I did as we learn how the three of them fought against the barriers in their life, with Tracy even tracking down and communicating with the boys, now men, who were instrumental in her father’s death. A hard, but interesting read.

💭 REVIEW 💭

Learning to Think by Tracy King
Publishing Date: 7th March 2024

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5

📝 - Tracy King grew up in a working-class family in Birmingham, with her parents and older sister. Despite the hardships that they went through including poverty, unemployment, and issues with the education system, all in all the King family was relatively happy. But when father of the family, Mike King, dies under suspicious circumstances, family life begins to spiral. Tracy King recounts the numerous issues they faced before and after the death of her father, and reflects on these experiences with a newly developed skill of critical thinking.

💭 - This was a very interesting read, quite unlike other memoirs I’ve read. From the blurb I thought it would have a heavy focus on the dangers of being immersed in a religion such as born-again Christianity, but this was not the central part. Instead King recounts her and her family’s life, their struggle to thrive under the broken system in the UK, and how quickly things can spiral. Throughout the memoir, there is a focus on reflecting critically on key events throughout her life, such as joining a religious group and the breakdown of her family’s relationship with education, which is done very well. I also liked that I could see her development throughout, as she dived deeper into her fathers death later in life, and began to question how she had thought about him. I did struggle slightly with some of the structure, as anecdotes are inserted without much of a lead up, and then stopped just as suddenly. On the whole, though, quite a unique memoir, and one I would recommend.

#learningtothink #tracyking #netgalley #arc #netgalleyreads #review #bookreview #bookreviewer #bookreviews #reading #februaryreads #memoir #nonfiction #2024reads #readmorebooks

This is a very heartfelt memoir of Tracy Kings childhood growing up in poverty on a new council estate outside Birmingham. A very harrowing story at times- Tracy’s family do their best to make ends meet, and Tracy explains well how many working class still live today- very much feast or famine. Coupled with mental health problems, addiction, and school refusal- Tracy tells the story of how her family were treated by social services and the impact that had on them. King writes eloquently about the loss of her father in such a harrowing way and how she is coming to terms with that in her own way, with the many years it has taken to find out some semblance of truth.

This is a remarkable and intense memoir written by Tracy King. I’m finding it very difficult to summarise as the book touches on so much. It is essentially about King’s life growing up on a council estate not far from Birmingham with her Mum, Dad and older sister. Each of them has their issues but it is a loving and creative atmosphere. However, when King is 12, her Dad is killed and part of the book is about her trying to find out the truth as a youngster, then trying to shield herself so that she can break free of her trauma but then ultimately learning how to look back and assess her experiences.

The art/skill of learning and questioning is a strong theme in the book as is alcoholism, agoraphobia and born-again Christianity. However, it is the memoir of someone who grew up in circumstances that many do not manage to break free of and who are crushed by a broken system. As the author says, there are likely to be many other similar stories out there but people from her background don’t get the chance to tell them. I hope this will encourage publishers and others to give opportunities for a multitude of stories from a variety of backgrounds to be told.

Overall, this book is incredibly well written. While it contains lots of difficult subjects, it wasn’t difficult to read and I would recommend it to others who enjoy reading non-fiction.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read this book.

I'd seen a lot of hoopla about this book so thought I'd give it a go despite not having heard of Tracy King. So glad I did because what you get is an extraordinary story of an ordinary family whose lives were changed by several events they couldn't control.

The King family could have been any ordinary working class family living in England but due to Jackie (mother) having agoraphobia plus other phobias and Mike (father) having a drink problem their first traumatic event comes early on in the form of their eldest daughter, Emily, picking up on her mother's trauma and becoming a school refuser. This leads eventually to her being placed in a boarding school miles from home.

The second (and even more significant) trauma came with the death of Mike following an altercation with some local youths. This led to a trial in which the family seems to have been as much on trial as the young man accused.

So if I continue I'll just end up rewriting the book (only far less well). Suffice to say that these events had a profound effect on Tracy King who went on to lead a somewhat chaotic life for some years.

However using the skills her family gave her Tracy has become a success story and decided to go back to find out what really happened the night her father died.

The book is about so much more than that one pivotal event. The book is about love and understanding and learning to take apart long held beliefs and holding them up to scrutiny.

This is a great book and I loved reading it. Tracy clearly had exceptional parents and the love within the family leaps off the pages and really made me smile. What happened to them all was tragic but unlike others who have been, for whatever reason, unable to escape the chaos Tracy King has used her experience to learn and teach others and now to bring a wonderful, often heartbreaking, book to life.

Thankyou to Tracy King for this deeply personal look at her life. It must have taken courage to go looking for the truth.

Thankyou to Netgalley and Random House for the advance review copy.

It takes guts to write a memoir of your own life and anybody who can do that has five stars in my opinion. Its raw, emotional and gut wrenching! If this book doesn't pull at your heart strings then I think you have something missing!!! I was reading this and without realising I was crying!

A brutal telling of Tracy’s upbringing in 80s/90s Birmingham. Very matter of fact at times whilst simultaneously being heartfelt and raw. If that makes any sense?! Tracy at times seems detached from what she’s writing but perhaps that’s because she has grown so much and looks back with some distance between who she was and who she is. The awful death of her father is so sad…

Thank you to Netgalley, the publisher and the author for the ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Anyone who makes themselves vulnerable to write their memoir always deserves 5 stars in my eyes.

I thought this was a powerful, raw and heart wrenching account of Tracy's life growing up in a council estate in Birmingham in the 70's and 80's. It's a story of family, poverty, mental health, trauma, judgement, murder, confusion, memories, truth seeking and ultimately hope.

"I'm my own exorcist, and the trick of surviving to the end of the book is to know that i'm more than my demons"

This is very interesting memoir of Tracy’s childhood in the 70s and 80s living in council housing in the Birmingham area. Her writing really brings to life the challenges for families with little money and inadequate professional support when needed.

Her mother had mental health issues and wouldn’t venture out while her father was an alcoholic. Meanwhile, Emily, her elder sister by two years, develops a school phobia and becomes known as a ‘school refuser’ which is dealt with in some pretty brutal ways by the authorities. The family then get very involved in a local church and all become born again Christians but shortly after her father dies in an act of senseless violence on the council estate.

Later in life author, Tracy King, delves more into her father’s death and the last third becomes somewhat of a psychological analysis into critical thinking and less of a memoir.

I really was gripped by the first two thirds but found the end a little dull as I was enjoying this book as a memoir and was not so interested in appreciating the author’s newly gained intellect in the way she thought. I was also a little frustrated as at one point the memoir seemed to be heading into the family being sucked into a rather way out Christian church or even a cult but this storyline simply fizzled out.

I also wanted to know more about the current life of the author, her sister and mother but I wonder is omitted as the author is clearly trying keen to protect the anonymity of some mentioned in the book, especially those involved at the time of her father’s death.

One thing I did struggle with was that she started by saying that mothers are known as Mom in the area she grew up in but after the first few pages she referred to her parents mainly by their Christian names, Jackie and Mike. I found that very odd and distracting from the story as it was almost like it was a biography and not a memoir.

With thanks to NetGalley and Random House UK, Transworld Publishers for a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.