Loved this book and loved the plot. It was a great psychological thriller and the author did a great job at bouncing between characters as well as managing different timelines. This book touches on alot of triggers; including: infertility, mental health, sexual assault, adoption, and some twisted thoughts - but it’s nothing intense and plays into the storyline well.

I found the story hard to follow sometimes, but I just think the authors writing style is just slightly different than my preference in styles. All in all, I’d give this book a 4.5 and I would definitely read more from this author.

This book is a fast-paced, twisty thriller with multiple perspectives and timelines that keep you on the edge of your seat. It’s about Billie Campbell, an adoption specialist struggling with infertility, who becomes obsessed with adopting her pregnant client’s baby. Meanwhile, her husband Tyler is dealing with his own secrets and unsettling anonymous messages.

On the other side of town, Anne, who gave up her child years ago, is desperate to reconnect with her lost baby and the man she once loved. Everything unravels when the client’s baby is abducted, and Billie becomes a prime suspect. As Tyler uncovers shocking connections, Billie disappears, and the search for both her and the baby is on. This story dives into family, secrets, and the risks that come with longing and loss.

First of all: Billie and Tyler are insufferable. Two of the most non-communicating-est, avoidant, non-perceptive people in the world. The world could be on fire around the two of them and they'd still be caught up in whether or not they remembered to unplug the iron before they left for work because it felt like every time something crazy happened they were worried about the least important thing. Billie was very passive and dare I say a doormat. If I had a husband who rarely answered my phone calls and worked constantly and did a full 180 from wanting kids and making me feel like I only ever wanted kids by myself he would be my husband no longer. Instead, Billie is just like "awwww, he's so busy, poor thing." Huh?!

Anne was a complete nut, but she was also someone who was suffering due to untreated mental illness. And I would even venture to say that she was perhaps still experiencing trickle down effects of postpartum depression and PTSD from childhood SA. But Ruskin did not explore these themes in a way I felt was responsible or sympathetic. Instead it's crazy lady, bad, bad lady, scary.

Zelly Ruskin has some pretty disturbing commentary surrounding fat people/fat bodies/fatness. Every single person who is fat in this book (and it's more than a couple) is written about like they are circus freaks who lack self control and are also physically terrifying due to their fatness and big bodied-ness. That narrative got old VERY fast and is so 2004-coded it was shocking this came out in 2024.

SO many parts of this book felt aged simply because the commentary/general feelings have changed. Overall, Ruskin is not a bad author in terms of grammar and syntax; this was a fair debut. However, I don't think I'll be reading more from her because her perspective and opinions in this body of work are not aligned with mine.

3 ⭐️s

Thank you to She Writes Press and NetGalley for providing an ARC!

THANK YOU 🙏🏻 to senior publicist, Grace Fell for reaching out, asking me if I’d be keen to read this book and providing an e-ARC.

In her pitch, Grace said the following: ‘This fall, Zelly Ruskin uses her former experience as an adoption consultant to create a story full of courage, heart, and strength that explores adoption, fertility, and motherhood. Perfect for fans of Little Fires Everywhere and The Last Thing He Told Me by Laura Dave, NOT YOURS TO KEEP (She Writes Press, October 8) follows three individuals whose lives collide as they all balance lies, secrets, and desires. Perfect for Adoption Awareness Month (November) reading lists.’

I was intrigued and agreed so here are my thoughts! 👇🏻

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩



First and foremost, I’m not your mother, so check your trigger warnings!

Here’s some of what you can expect in Not Yours To Keep:

📌 palpable tension

📌 infertility

📌 secrets

📌 betrayal

📌 deception

📌 adoption

📌 abuse (child + domestic)

📌 guilt

📌 a search for the truth

📌 abduction

Not Yours To Keep by Zelly Ruskin is a psychological suspense novel filled with drama & gasp out loud moments. The opening was so gripping, I was immediately hooked. It was hard to fathom this was a debut because the characters, scenes and dialogue were so on point!

Told in multiple POV’s (Billie/Anne/Tyler), and looking at the past and present, a sinister story is woven and I have to admit that I was probably more invested in Billie & Tyler as characters however it was Anne’s POV’s that intrigue me the most.

At times you do have to suspend your disbelief as coincidences take over, but that didn’t affect my reading experience at all. There was a slow build up in the first half of the novel and then 💥BOOM💥 the pace really picked up and led to a satisfying conclusion.

Would I recommend this debut? I absolutely would. If you love sinister storylines, emotive reads with red-herrings that will have your head spinning – this would tick all those boxes!

All right, so this started out fine - while a young, married couple, Tyler and Billie, are struggling with infertility issues, Tyler begins receiving cryptic, weird messages from a former classmate who delivered a baby (possibly his) years ago.
Other implausible plot points started getting thrown in, things went off the rails, and I finally found myself wondering what the hell happened to this book. It just turned hammy and absurd. Oh well.
Thanks to #netgalley and #shewritespress for this #arc of #notyourstokeep in exchange for an honest review.

Once I started this book, I quite literally could not put it down. The mysteries that continue unraveling throughout, and the deepening connections between seemingly unrelated characters as it switches points of view, will keep you turning pages -- possibly all in one sitting. The twist at the very end brought my star rating up from a 3 to a 4. I wish I could read it again for the first time.

I thought this was a good suspenseful book and rated it 4 stars because although some parts were predictable, how the author laid it all out overall was still a good read. I really enjoyed having three different POVs in this book. Seeing it through the eyes of Anne, Billie, & Tyler kept it all at a very nice pace in this story throughout. Seeing how they all had trauma from their past and how it came forward as adults which made all three of their paths cross eventually. Billie is struggling with infertility issues in her personal life, while her career is working with birth mothers that give up their babies for adoption while she wants to be a mother herself. Her husband Tyler is trying to make partner at his firm but is getting sidetracked now that a blast from his past has come out the woodworks and he’s not entirely sure he wants to even be a father anymore. Anne had a terrible childhood because of her father who constantly haunts her thoughts & has a secret she’s been carrying around for years. I loved how the ending was realistic and not super corny and I think the author did a great job with wrapping it all up. Grateful for this complimentary copy for my honest review.

Unfortunately I didn’t enjoy this book as it just felt unrealistic and there was unnecessary chapters that could have been cut out and made the book shorter but flow better.

This book was good, however it felt like it was a bit fluffed and could have been shorter and no information would have been lost. The timeline is a bit wonky and hard to follow, and the multiple POVs can get slightly confusing.

However that being said, I did enjoy the book. Billie is struggling with fertility while her husband, Tyler, is struggling as well, but it’s more so whether he even wants kids or not… then Anne comes into the picture and everything is changed. Emotional and heartbreaking at times. How far is Billie willing to go in order to become a mother? What secrets is Tyler keeping that could come crashing down? And who is Anne? Who is she looking for and why?

I’d like to thank NetGalley for giving me the opportunity to read this eARC. I’d like to thank the author, Zelly Ruskin, and the publisher She Writes Press. This is my honest review.

NOT YOURS TO KEEP was very different than your typical domestic thriller.

It was impossible not to sympathize with Billie due to her infertility. While there was some mystery involved this was much more about family dynamics and what some people will do to get what they so desperately want.

This story was very engaging and although the pace was slower than I'd prefer it came together well and has a satisfying conclusion..

We've all come across those Lifetime movies where a young mother gives up her child. This story follows a similar premise, but it takes things to a whole new level with unexpected twists. Initially, I thought I had it all figured out, but I was pleasantly surprised by how everything unfolded. The plot kept me engaged, and the resolution was both satisfying and unpredictable. I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys a gripping psychological thriller.

Billie and Tyler have thriving careers and are seemingly happy. However, Billie can't have the one thing she wants the most: a child. As the couple suffers through miscarriage and infertility, a blast from the past worms their way into Tyler's life.

I sympathized with Billie's struggle of being infertile while working as an adoption specialist.

Anne had a troubled childhood and is haunted by events that occurred then. Although she was initially unlikeable, my heart broke for her.

"Not Yours To Keep" was an okay read. It was slow in the beginning but engaging enough nonetheless. It tackled some dark subjects, but all were handled well.

Thanks to NetGalley and She Writes Press for the ARC.

Emotional and drama filled. It focuses on women's issues of fertility, adoption and the length we will strive for. There is a little bit of mystery but more family dynamics. I feel it is a interesting, heartfelt story and is a gem of a read in women's fiction.

This thriller is a roller coaster of emotions, The short chapters made this book a page turner and a quick read although it is very slow burn and majority of the twists and turns happen around the last half of the book but the suspense was there all along and it made me want to find out the truth as soon as possible. The ending though was shocking and satisfying, I didn’t see it coming.

This is a story about though topics such as grief and loss, infertility and adoption, it also talks about motherhood and its struggles. Billie wants a baby, her husband isn’t so sure and is keeping secrets, the tension is creating problems in their relationship, add to that a woman who comes into their lives and creates more drama than you can imagine… The perfect mix for a very messy story and I absolutely loved that.

𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙞𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 :
• psychological thriller
• domestic thriller
• family & friends drama
• jealousy & betrayal

Thank you Zelly Ruskin, She Writes Press & NetGalley for an e-ARC copy.

#NotYoursToKeep #NetGalley

Not Yours to Keep by Zelly Ruskin.
This psychological thriller was told in tyler, billie and anne's POVs. This was such a fast paced read. I could not put it down.
This book has family drama, thriller and mystery.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the Advance Readers Copy.

Not Yours To Keep by Zelly Ruskin is a book I have tried to understand but I feel completely lost in this story. I believe there are three different threads that may or may not be tied together. It took me weeks to get to 50% because the book has really dragged. I finally decided to DNF Not Yours To Keep after the story jumped from one couple to a female without any warning the change was happening and kind of leaving mid plot point. This isn’t the first time holes were made by the author in the story that it has become impossible to follow.

3.25. I enjoyed this book, although if you are looking for a thriller with twists you will not find it here. This book was a fast and enjoyable read. My only negative thoughts with this book are 1. I believe that the characters emotions during high stake moments were not transmitted the best. Some of the inner dialogue from the characters seemed very underwhelming for the situations. And 2. The book description says "Their lives become entangled when the client’s newborn is abducted, and Billie becomes a prime suspect. Amid the chaos unleashed by the abduction, Tyler uncovers a link between the person tormenting him and the abduction—but now Billie has disappeared too. The race to find both her and the baby is on; but will they find them before it’s too late?". Unfortunately these events (like the abduction) only really happen after the 85% mark, so do not go into this book thinking that will be the main plot. Overall I enjoyed this book.

Thank you netgalley, the publisher, and Zelly Ruskin for giving me the opportunity to read this book in exchange for an honest review!

📚 Book Review 📚

Not Yours To Keep by Zelly Ruskin
Publication October 8, 2024

Thank you so much @booksparks and @zellyruskin for the #gifted copy and take part in #frc2024 tour!

The story follows Billie and her husband Tyler as they are trying to conceive a baby. Billie works as an adoption specialist who assists parents in finding the perfect home for their baby. Tyler works as an attorney.

Billie begins to go to great lengths to become pregnant. Her and Tyler see specialists and will seek any kind of treatment in order to achieve their goal. However, Billie develops into a character who becomes obsessed. Will her obsession to conceive unravel the both of them?

However, there is another character on the sidelines that is connected to Tyler’s past, Anne. Anne soon has an obsession of her own.

How far are you willing to go to have the perfect family? This book touches on very heavy topics. I found it to be a slow burn that gets going in the second half of the story. Once it did, I couldn’t put it down!
3.5 raised to 4 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Trigger warnings— Infertility, miscarriage, child abuse

#notyourstokeep #zellyruskin #frc2024 #booksparks

Not Yours to Keep is a gripping thriller. So powerful and filled with emotion for me, it was a difficult read personally at times because of how raw and real the emotions were. Really interesting story that really asks the question of how far someone is willing to go.

“Not Yours to Keep” is a timely novel wrestling with infertility and adoption and handles both topics both gently and thoughtful.

Billie deals with infertile couples as an adoption specialist but never expected she’d face the same issue. However, her husband, Tyler, is not so sure. The third voice is Anne who wrestles with the child she gave up and a lost love. That alone is plenty of story, but when a baby goes missing, Billie is the immediate suspect and these individual threads end up weaving together in a heart-thudding and unexpected way.

Ruskin is an excellent storyteller who clearly knows her characters and allows them to tell their stories. While this novel is categorized as a thriller, “Not Yours to Keep” is also a family drama where it can become difficult to take sides. I enjoyed this story tremendously.

Four out of five stars.

My thanks to the author, the publisher, and NetGalley for this great read.