I was really excited to read this because I really wanted to get more into my aro-ace identity. Unfortunately, the writing just felt really stilted to me and it really took me out of the book.

The author offers some really good advice and helps readers to better understand who they are as an Ace/Aro person. The main issue I have with this book is that it can’t solve the major stumbling block in relationships: finding a partner who wants to be with someone who is Ace/Aro. If you can find that person, it makes it so much easier to navigate a relationship. The author gives good advice about compromising and offers insight into helping you better understand yourself. If a partner reads this book and is able to make the relationship work, than that is amazing. This book is something that needs to be read more by the Ace/Aro partner than the person themselves. The better our partners understand us and we understand them, the more successful our relationship will be.

I received an advanced copy of this title for free in exchange for my unbiased opinion.

A complimentary copy was provided in exchange for an honest review.

This isn't what I was expecting. I started this and was excited to read it but it wasn't actually helpful. I thought it would help with how to meet people and develop friendships and personal relationships. I didn't get that here. It mostly provided advice for people who already had a relationship of some kind.

I'm sure this will prove helpful to some but not what I was looking for.

2 stars.

Excellent read for any asexuals or aromantics curious about dating (or anyone interested in reading about dating someone who is ace). Probably mostly useful for young readers - some of the information will be familiar to adults who have read any other texts on asexuality.

Daigle-Orians has a very personal approach, and will add elements from his life, however, this is a proper guide book and not a memoir.

I loved this book so much! As someone who is aspec, I found it super helpful and practical. It also made me feel seen and understood in ways that I didn’t know I needed. Definitely recommend this one!!

At times I felt like it was a little dense, but that might be because these are conversations and topics I've been surrounded by for a long time.

Some of the major pros to this book go to the Reflect & Act sections and the way it provides concrete examples for how to have difficult conversations in relationships. This books strength comes from the very thorough and well laid out format that strengthens the points being made. I think this is an excellent book for everyone, not just teenagers, to read.

"The Ace and Aro Relationship Guide: Making It Work in Friendship, Love, and Sex" by Cody Daigle-Orians is a comprehensive resource designed to empower asexual (ace) and aromantic (aro) individuals in navigating and cultivating fulfilling relationships. Drawing from his extensive experience as an asexuality educator and advocate, Daigle-Orians offers practical advice and personal insights tailored to the unique experiences of the ace and aro communities.

(Thank you to NetGalley, Cody Daigle-Orians and Jessica Kingsley Publisher for this ARC)

This book was not only very informative but also a good resource for anyone who’s aspec.

It talks a whole lot about how to set up boundaries and how to be able to have a relationship with other people who aren’t aspec and how to handle rejection and other things that might come up when coming out.

I really liked the way the author also explained that they might have some more specific examples from their own experiences with being ace and have a bit less experience with aro and aroace because of that, but also made sure to include as much as they could for aro and aroace people.

On top of that, I thought all the examples for how to make a relationship work for aspec folks were pretty good and informative. And I can see a lot of people trying them out and having them as guidelines.

I recommend this book for anyone, whether that be for aspec or allo people who want to learn, since it’s a good resource for learning about being in a relationship as a aspec person. And because it might help to explain how anyone can still have a relationship as a aspec person.

I think this book can be an incredibly useful tool for aspec people. It provides a theoretical framework within which one can explore, even just in their own head, whether a certain type of relationship can be a good fit for them. Of course, this isn't a substitute for actual trial and failure, but it can make the inevitable trial (and possible failure) much smoother.

It's hard to give an objective opinion on something that is meant to touch the reader on such a personal level. Despite my neurodivergent need to always over-analyze and theorize much more than I should, I will say that I am happy that this guide exists, and also that, once read, one has to forget some of it, because life will always be more complex than what anyone can put into words.

This book really resonated with me. If I had the means, I'd buy copies for those I love to read. Because of this book, I now know for sure I can identify as demi sexual and romantic. I'd like to read this again one day to make notes and outlines about the book.

What an incredibly helpful and validating guide! This was the first piece of media to make me truly feel like I have a place in the world and I'm not lesser/broken/etc. This should be required reading for everyone.

As an asexual person who has not been in a relationship, I found that many parts of this book were very relatable to me, but the parts about non-platonic relationships (eg romantic or sexual) were not, but I did find it very useful for future reference and also fascinating to find out other opinions and experiences. The author has an excellent way of making everyone feel included and I’d recommend this to anyone looking to form a relationship either AS an ace and/or aro person, or with one.

The Ace and Aro Relationship Guide is a book that should sit on every aspec person's bookshelf, not just for themself but also for their loved ones. It should be in the bookshelves of counsellors, romance authors, and more.

Offering a simple but not dumbed down explanation for aspects of relationships – including autonomy, consent, respect, care, and more – the guide does more than just explain relationships to the reader. It offers actionable advice and support for entering, forming, developing, and ending healthy relationships. It also tackles red flags in relationships, and gives opportunities to reflect on what you want out of any relationship.

Highly recommended!

The synopsis initially drew me in, and I can see the appeal of this book, but I quickly realised I wasn’t the target audience. That said, I think this will be a valuable resource for those seeking answers to their questions and looking for ways to express themselves and establish their boundaries. While it wasn’t my match, I’m sure it will resonate with the right audience.

Note: This ARC was provided for free by NetGalley, Jessica Kingsley Publishers and Cody Daigle-Orians but all opinions are my own.

I found the book well written and easy to follow. I appreciate the kindness Cody Daigle-Orians employs to approach all topics. Given the limited literature on asexuality, any resources, especially ones this caring, are extremely valuable.

I would have liked some of the tools provided to be more specific, as some felt a bit generic. Admittedly I might not be the target audience, as I am both a sex educator and demisexual myself, but this what I would consider the book's limitation.

It will be most appropriate for younger readers or readers who have just started their journey through gender sexuality related fields, and I will certainly include it in the bibliography I share with my students.

I should start by saying that this is the first non-fiction book I have read about being ace. Though I have known because of info I found on Tumblr I was ace in some way for over ten years (that number just shocked me) I have never met another ace or found easily accessible information regarding what this means. I really appreciated the intro and explanation of Allonormativity. For years I have pondered at feeling alien in a world that assumes everyone stakes such importance on what is unimportant to me. I liked how the author explained why these presumptions are damaging to those that don't fit it. For example the societal hierarchy of relationships has left me feeling inadequate since I was a teenager. my inability to be a part of the 'normal' relationship milestones that I have seen every person in my life take has left me feeling so lonely and inadequate; broken and wishing I were normal. This is exactly why it's so vital this book exists! My ace-ness is not a negative attribute! This book felt like a hug, like someone comforting me and telling that voice in my head that they're wrong. The final chapter left me close to tears. The Ace spectrum is so misunderstood and demonised, even by the Queer community! For ace people, being ace has often leaves us feeling isolated and lead to dark thoughts. So you can imagine how much it meant to me for the author to finish the book with a reminder that "being aspec is an expansion of possibility, not a limiting of it." Thank you for this book, I wish I had it when I was a teenager. But I'm glad I have it now too. <3

Interesting book, loved it! Looking forward to more from this author! Apologies for the lateness of my review

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review of The Ace and Aro Relationship Guide. Unfortunately I was unable to download this book before the archive date. I look forward to finding it at my local bookstore or library.

I had to skim most of this book, because the formatting was really weird. I know it is just an arc, but there weren’t any breaks for chapters, there would be a random letter and the rest of the word would be in a new paragraph, it was hard to read. With that being said I did like the book, and will get a finished copy. I liked the topics that were brought up and how they gave a content warning before the topic of abuse was brought up.

Wonderfully written with kindness and much needed gentleness, the author wanted this book to be accessible for young people, which it is but that also means that its a great book for anyone of any age to understand more about relationships, especially if they are Ace or Aro. Beginning with helpful definitions and an illuminating 10 point relationship toolkit, that are really helpful building blocks, I like the questions and moments for reflection with self or others that are suggested in this section. The next section is more of a guide to relationship stages themselves, some of which will be familiar to anyone in the UK who has read or heard the work of Meg-John Barker. A helpful and welcome addition to books about relationships that I think everyone could learn from but especially for those who are Ace/Aro or those who wish to understand more.

With thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.