This memoir follows Busra, a young Dutch Woman of Turkish origin. She is living a double life in that at home/ around family she is the "good" daughter, dutiful and respectful, following all the tenants of Islam that she is told make her a "worthy and righteous woman". However, she has a secret boyfriend as is living a life of a typical Dutch Woman at other times. She has always chaffed at the treatment women/ girls receive in comparison to men. The women live highly restrictive lives without much agency. She is able to get a little independence living with her grandmother and working, as at these times she is not under the watchful eye of her mother. This book was a hard and dense read, the author has had a difficult life and sees the benefits of Dutch society, and feels that women in these restrictive religions miss out on a lot. The examples of ostracising daughters who don't conform is quite jarring and sad. I feel like this book was unbalanced, the chapter on her sexual exploits with her boyfriend was quite unnecessary. Other chapters I didn't get their purpose, like the one in Rome and their teenage conversations. Some chapters especially those that are not direct quotes from texts or recorded speech, I can't imagine that she remembers these conversations verbatim. They were sort of strange. The chapters that I enjoyed most were those that were on someone's lived experience be it her grandmother or some other relative. Overall, this book is quite educational and would recommend.

I received this ebook ARC from NetGalley and Little, Brown Book Group UK | Virago in exchange for a free and honest review

This was a very interesting read, I really loved how Büsra's charatcer was used to explore a very strict Turkish and Muslim culture and it gave me a real insight into this world having had little knowledge of this previously. Her character was strong and leapt off of the page, the book was insightful, darkly funny and fully engrossing.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the chance to read this ARC.

I’ve made an effort to explore translated fiction and broaden my genre preferences, but I found the writing style in this one too challenging to connect with.

I understood after I picked up this book that it had become very controversial when first published in Dutch with threats being unfortunately issued to the author. It is definitely frank with strong opinions of the author, it raises many issues to consider, though is not very well written. The central character is given the name Busra (a 20-year-old woman), but as has been widely reported, is clearly inspired by the author herself.

Busra, her parents, brother Halil and sister Defne live in Amsterdam West. Her parents had migrated from Turkey and they continue to be in touch with relatives there, visiting every year. Her grandmother Oma is also in Amsterdam, and Busra feels freer with her. Her parents are ultra-conservative, heeding the advice of the cleric in the local mosque to the letter. This means for Busra - being fully covered, avoiding talking to males, watching content declared safe etc. The children also attend a religious school, and are expected to accord more importance to that. She finds it stifling as it is contrast to the local culture, and even within her community, the males have far fewer restrictions. The local cleric keeps warning the community of the decadence prevalent in the country and the need to be virtuous. Lali, without her parents’ knowledge has a boyfriend and insists on working. She is careful though to cover her head, as is expected. She knows that she has to decide her way forward and this double life cannot continue – either to be open & brave risking isolation or to align to her parents’ expectations.

This book raises many important matters related to – cultural identity, gender inequality, assimilation, co-existence, personal choice and aspirations. I was reminded in some ways of “Educated” by Tara Westover; though the circumstances and details are very different, there are a few common aspects related to negation of many aspects of modernity. As part of the story, the cultural underpinnings of her family are described well. Unfortunately, this is otherwise a poorly written book, many sections being bitter & derisive in tone. Her message of personal choice would have made a better impact had the outlook being more mature, rather than coming across as rambling. Nevertheless, there are important aspects to her story.

Lale Gül wrote "I Will Live" as a 22-23 year old, which shows through her writing. It's a unique combination of immaturity and yet certain life experiences and access to the Turkish culture that white Westerners her age won't have. And from the interviews with author it becomes clear that the plot is strongly influenced by her own life.

The main character that Gül wrote, Büsra, has this young rebelliousness to her that can't fully flourish because of the constraints of her "begetters", which is how Büsra calls her parents. Rules imposed by her family are in contradiction to the life Büsra wants to live but her survival instinct leads her ot actually living a double life. On one hand it may be completely non understandable, as she is an adult, yet as the story goes, becomes more and more clear. It's hard to escape when you have no actual comfortable place to go and if you don't want to severe ties with a young and impressionable sibling.

Gül's writing is a criticism of Turkish-Islamic culture and "I Will Live" reads like a manifesto but I'm afraid it won't be understood outside the Dutch context.

This was a different read for me but I something drew me to it and I am glad it did. This book gave me an insight into a world of danger for women that still exists. I loved following Büsra as she rebels.

Very excited for this inspiring novel! It a shame a double standard still exists, but it very much does! I’m so looking forward to sharing full thoughts and a review on this story. It’s such an inspiration to woman everywhere seeing someone try to live their life independently and passionately as possible despite what society/family dictates, but woman need to remember as well safety is always key.