The most positive thing about this book is the cover. The cover is wonderful in its design, a proper showstopper.
Unfortunately, that’s where the positives started and finished.
The book was extremely difficult to get into, the word that comes to mind regarding the writing style is jarring. It’s all over the place.
The characters were unlikeable, the plot line was poorly executed.
( I finished it because I don’t like DNF-ing, but that’s a personal choice).

This book was painfully unreadable. I was drawn in by the gorgeous cover and the interesting premise, but the book itself just was not good.

It follows two different characters, Noah and Malachia, every other chapter as they navigate the strange world proposed by the author. Noah seems like a character from our world, drawn in to the strange monster-like building as a salesman because he needed a job. Malachia’s chapters are something else entirely, and make almost zero sense. She doesn’t appear human, she’s some kind of acolyte or something, and there’s something about bones, godlike creatures, and a desire to restore something (?).

This book just did not make any sense. I could tell the author was going for a cheeky tone, making the horror absurd and funny—but it did not come off as funny, just juvenile and ridiculous. None of the descriptions or dialogue felt real or natural, it felt like the author was just trying to say “Ooo this is weird right? This is so weird, fuck, I’m weird ooo”. It felt like a high schooler trying to be creative in english class, trying to come up with a scary story in a time crunch using a thesaurus. The footnotes were pointless, and there were constant references to things that just didn’t work.

I’ll say the only enjoyable part of the book was the actual newspaper sections, particularly the person on the island. Those sections I found genuinely engaging, and the moss reminded me of Annihilation. If the whole novel had that tone / similar story structure, I think it could have been very good! That being said, that one small part did not make the book worth reading. I wouldn’t recommend.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with an eARC!

I definitely got drawn into this one by the cover and the promise of body horror. However, I just could not get into this story.

I found Noah's chapters slightly easier to follow than Malachia but really didn't have a clue what was going on for the majority and decided to give up about halfway into the book.

I didn't like the use of footnotes and they didn't add any clarity to the story. I liked the use of mixed media however they do not translate well on an e-reader and I had to look at those pages on my phone (in the NetGalley app) to understand what was going on there.

Thankyou NetGalley & Unbound for the ARC!

I wanted to love this one. The cover looked so cool and intrigued me. Once reading I found myself totally confused. It was super hard to follow and I wasn’t able to get into the story.

I had a tough time rating this book. It was challenging to follow, and I was interested in the beginning, but somewhere in the middle, I was not enjoying it anymore, and finishing it was more of a chore. I wanted to like it.

I received an Advanced Readers Copy of this ebook in exchange for an honest review. Thank you, NetGalley and Unbound.

Thank you netgalley for giving me the chance to read this book i will say the cover caught my eye 👁️ and so i wanted to dive into this one when i got approved and ill be honest at first i was so confused and at times while reading it i still was but i definitely think the horror elements and dark elements to this novel kept me wanting to know what was going on.. I will say noahs chapters were definitely easier to understand compared to the author ones but i still enjoyed what i was reading. I dont know if it was a kindle issue or it was supposed to be like that but the newspaper and stuff was hard to read and stuff so i didnt really understand much of that but like i said maybe it was supposed to be like that or maybe that sadly was just how it looked on kindle. I noticed some love elements in this novel as well it seemed that each persons chapters had some of that but like i said i still dont really know what i read but i did enjoy it i can see why the reviews are mixed but i do think horror readers etc will enjoy this one or maybe understand it more then i did! Quick read and very interesting and weird at times so i feel as it was fitting to the cover.

The writing style felt like a loosely edited stream of consciousness. It was hard to follow the staccato sentence structure and feel a sense of story.

I honestly have no idea what I just finished reading. I am thoroughly confused and I love it. This is just the kind of novel I've been waiting for. Equal parts silly and still able to make me feel uneasy. Unable to put down for the entire read through I did. The only negative is now I have to wait to hold a physical copy of this for a pretty long time till the beginning of next year.

I was originally drawn to this book for its cover, the bright green caught my eye and upon further inspection the eyeballs in the sardine can sold me.
This book is twisted and a body horror novel that leaves you fascinated and disturbed. I learned that this author is best known for his Dread Singles Twitter account which I have now added to my follow list. The story itself is about two flawed main characters who live in live in parallel universes,

I would recommend going into this book knowing nothing about the story as I did. I do however wish this book had been longer and more fleshed out with more world building.

Noah embarks on his journey at Printed Matter, media company that hires with no experience needed, maybe should have been a red flag. In another dimension, Malachia is hired by The Congregation and wakes up to find everyone in The City of Silence has disappeared. Both of their journeys unknowingly bring them closer together, revealing a secret world ruled by a media giant. Along the way, they encounter magical typewriters, forests that scream, and delve into queer romances, all while uncovering the dark forces at work.

This debut novel is a seamless blend of horror, fantasy, and romance. "Hot Singles in Your Area" is a must-read for anyone who loves body-horror and is searching for a uniquely twisted narrative.

I was definitely drawn in by this eye catching cover and the synopsis sounded so weird and intriguing that I just had to read it!
However I can't help shake the feeling that there may be some prior information or backstory that I missed out on before diving into this book.

Now don't get me wrong, I quite enjoy a bizarre horror story that keeps me feeling many different shades of 'What the F*ck!?' along the way, but it also has to tie together nicely by the end and make some beautifully weird and twisted masterpiece. Sadly I don't feel like this was the case for this one.

The chapters that followed Malachia I truly struggled with. The constant mentioning of all the outlandish places, establishments and creatures in the city without much context around them just left me completely lost and unable to visualise her journey at all.
Noah on the other hand I had a much easier time following.
I feel like if the book maybe had just picked one of these characters to flesh out completely and follow all the weird and deliciously horrific things that happen to them along the way I would've enjoyed it far more.

Also the use of cliff notes in a book has never been enjoyable for me and even more so when they don't seem to really make sense. It was almost like there was an unknown narrator jumping in at random moments for no real reason.
Though I will say I did like the inclusion of the mixed media elements, it still just left me feeling incredibly confused as to what it all meant.

Thankyou NetGalley & Unbound for the ARC!

For starters, the beautiful cover was so creepy it ALMOST could’ve prepared me for this body horror queer capitalist nightmare that the two main characters, Noah & Malachia find themselves in. “Anyhoo”Noah is one of my favorite character I’ve met in most horror novels I’ve read recently. I chuckled throughout the book and was struck by the author’s poetic yet sarcastic prose. The separate but parallel dynamics of the two main character’s relationships were both symbolic and gory in ways that will stick with you. I do wish the book was longer so I could’ve gotten to know more on the back story of the two characters and how they got to be so bitter and witty. I would definitely read this author again!

This book was something. Not quite sure what though. I was pretty confused the whole time and if any one wants to help me out I’d appreciate it. Novellas and short stories are really not my thing. I don’t get enough to really get invested in the book or characters. I wish I could write a better review but again it just confused me more then anything.

This is fun and veeeeery quirky. A little too quirky for my blood. It's like if someone thought that Welcome to Nightvale should be experienced through an audience surrogate.

"Hot Singles in Your Area" by Jordan Shiveley is a captivating entry into the body-horror genre that promises readers a riveting and unsettling experience. Shiveley, known for his Dread Singles Twitter account, introduces two flawed protagonists whose lives unfold in parallel universes.

Noah begins his journey at Printed Matter, a dominant media entity requiring no prior experience for its employees. In a different yet interconnected reality, Malachia works for The Congregation and awakens to find everyone in The City of Silence missing. Their separate quests unknowingly steer them towards each other, leading them into a concealed world dominated by a sinister media giant. As they navigate this eerie realm, they encounter magical typewriters, screaming forests, and explore queer romances, all while uncovering the malevolent forces at play.

Shiveley's debut novel skillfully intertwines elements of horror, fantasy, and romance, making "Hot Singles in Your Area" a must-read for fans of body-horror and those seeking a uniquely twisted narrative.

Thank you to NetGalley, the author, and publisher for an advanced copy to review for my honest opinion.

Well, I am not sure what I was expecting but the book confused me so much for some reason. I had to go back to start after reading couple pages. It’s something different and something readers are not used to.( In a good way) psychological analysis throughout the book was very good. Also I really liked when characters showed us their inner thoughts while narrating the story. It was different but enjoyable. Thanks to Netgalley and Unbound for giving me ARC in exchange for my honest review.

I was drawn in by the cover and the description, however I found this book incredibly hard to follow. I’ve struggled to finish this, a book with less than 200 pages that felt much longer than it was.

I couldn’t quite get into the story, Noah’s chapters were a lot easier to follow where for Malachia’s ones I really struggled to picture what I was reading, maybe if this had been a longer book with more room for description it would have been easy to follow. Also, I don’t really get the footnotes so much so that I stopped reading them altogether. The formatting of the darkness chapters also made them pretty hard to read.

Maybe I just didn’t understand it, I may re-read it at a later date and see if I change my mind but ultimately, I don’t think this book was for me.

This was funny, and horrific at the same time. it’s a great book! I enjoyed the writing style, and it made me really invested in the book. the cover was horrific but it was still funny, and slightly reminded me of butcher and blackbird.

I wish to do justice to this book. I might need to read it again to fully form my opinion.
Based on my first read hence the exciting first time experience, here are my thoughts.

1. I have not read anything like this before. I am certain many readers will observe the same. I like books that employ various mediums, formats and techniques, and still this was original, fresh and unique in its use of different forms (newspaper ads and journal mixes, paragraphs framed in words (you’ll know what I mean when you get to those pages).
2. Shiveley’s voice is humorous, modern and original.
3. The concept/idea is clever and has amazing potential.
4. I was more immersed in Noah’s side of the story because it was easier to read.
5. The full-word pages make those pages less legible to read.
6. Cool themes - not fully explored though.

Came for the body horror, stayed for the detailed world-building and pinpoint satire

Striking cover art gives a hint of where this book is headed, and the story takes off from page one, challenging the reader to catch up quick. The footnotes are a great touch, giving a sense of Something Bigger providing commentary and adding an odd context to Noah's (at first) seemingly mundane interview for a sales role at Printed Matter. Perusing the included pages, however, makes it clear that this is no ordinary publication.

Malachia enters the story next, bringing us to a strange and strangely empty city of bone architecture and fountains of dust. An encounter with a uniquely motivated figure at a typewriter pushes her toward one of the Powers that be, where she gets a job of her own to complete.

These diverse beginnings set Noah and Malachia on converging courses, as long as they can handle the creatures, constructs, and contractors in their paths.

Im so sorry but this totally fell short for me.

Normally im totally into this sort of stuff, ive been a big fan of Jason Pargin's books and I gathered from the description and cover that this one would be in line with that genre of 'what the fuuuuuck'.

I had no idea what was going on the whole time - normally im into that, but normally theres also bit more context; this is the one time I am BEGGING for an exposition dump.

Ultimately I didn't care about the characters, I felt like their personalities and personal stances had no impact on any of their decision making, and actually just quite boring if i'm being honest. For a short book, it felt intensely long.

I think it was just in need of more development.