This is a nicely written book with an interesting premise, but for me it wasn't a spectacular book. I didn't feel like I really got under the skin of the characters or understood what made them tick, and there were elements of the book (such as the focus on basketball, which to be fair I have zero interest in) that I found jarring and took me away from the main themes of aging and loneliness. I think this is a matter of personal taste though, as I really lean towards writers who have a lyrical, poetic style, whereas Markovits is far more straightforward in his writing.

I found his main character of Tom frustrating, particularly in his seeming refusal to take any responsibility for himself or his health. Although I must admit I know plenty of men who avoid seeing doctors at all costs, something about Tom's lacklustre approach to himself and his own wellbeing just ended up grating on me. I also found that the pacing of the novel dragged a bit.

I think plenty of people will get more out of this book than I did. I enjoyed moments of it, but I don't think its memory will linger for long.

This was strange book for me. Certainly not what I expected but, it turns out it was better than I imagined.
Tom is assessing his life now that the youngest child has headed off to college. Twelve years earlier his wife had had an affair and he’d decided that once the children were grownup he’d leave her. But life has a habit of throwing a few curve balls into the equation and for Tom it’s his health that changes things for him. After dropping said daughter to her college he just continues driving, in his mind he’s going to catch up with his son and some old friends, which he does, but to the detriment of his health.
This is not my normal type of story but I did enjoy it greatly. My advice is sometimes the unexpected stories are worth the chance.
For me this is a 4⭐️story. Many thanks to #NetGalley for my ARC of this book.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for my copy of this e-arc!

This book was interesting enough to hold my attention while I was reading but I didn’t immediately want to keep picking it up!

Overall it was a good read

This is the story of Tom, who has waited for his youngest child, Miri, to go off to college before leaving his wife. She had a brief affair years before and Tom set himself a target date to go.

When he gets the chance to drive Miri to college alone, a day’s drive away from home, he finds that he’s not ready to go back and just carries on driving, deciding to drop in on his younger brother, his college sweetheart and his former college roommate.

Having recently been put on sabbatical for taking a strange case of discrimination, he’s got no real reason to go straight home.

Tom’s not been feeling quite himself lately either…

This is an absolutely fascinating story. So minutely detailed and told as though this is a close friend sharing their day - every thought and observation is shared.

Tom had an idea in college that he wanted to write a book about travelling across the US and playing pick up basketball and writing about the people/players he met along the way.

I have no knowledge of basketball at all, or of the US college sports programs, and much of the geography, music and sporting references went completely over my head, yet I found myself absolutely next to him in a diner, in the car with him as he drove along the streets and sitting courtside as he played with strangers he met along the way.

When we finally find out what’s wrong with Tom, and his wife Amy comes to join him and their son, the ending is abrupt and perfect. I miss Tom.

Definitely not the story I was expecting or imagining but this richly described narration was immersive and strangely charming. It’s worth every second spent reading it.

It took ,e a while to get into this book but it was more interesting when Tom makes good on his bargain with himself and leaves his wife. He had decided , when learning of his wife’s affair, he would leave her when his daughter went to college. I felt this was a cruel thing to do as although he had been wronged he did not tell his wife his plan. So many differing emotions experienced by Tom on his journey. Overall I thought he was too self indulgent

So good. Manages to explain how distant events can continue to do damage decades later but gives the reader enough hope that there are new possibiities round the corner.

A middle-aged man discovers that his wife has an affair. Although their marriage has been in trouble for quite some time, he decides to do nothing until all his kids leave home for college. Finally, the day came.
This could have been such an emotional, reflective story about broken love, broken hopes, and shattered lives. The empty nest syndrome, combined with betrayal and devastating loneliness, sounds like a perfect recipe for a bestseller. Unfortunately, what we have here is a mess. Thoughts, memories, and countless unimportant dialogues made me lose interest at the beginning of the book. I decided to keep going, hoping that the book would pick up. DNF at 45%.

This book really grew on me quickly and I didn't expect to resonate so strongly with the main character or to become so invested in his life. Its a lovely thought provoking take on mid life. On what is next, on how the bodies we always relied on don't seem as strong as they were, on the possibility of changing from what you thought the rest of your life would look like . Tender and both heartwarming and wrenching, stick with this book, I found it a slow burn but from about a third of the way in, you'd have to wrestle it from my hands.
Recommend wholeheartedly.
4-4.5

The Rest of Our Lives follows Tom, who drives his 18-year-old daughter to college in Pittsburgh - and then keeps driving. Various aspects of his life are not going to plan and he drifts himself into a road trip to try and escape. Years earlier when his wife had an affair, Tom had decided that when their youngest child left for college he would leave the marriage - and that moment has now arrived. But it's also arrived at a moment when he's just been suspended from his job after his students complained about the politics of his law class, and he's got a health issue that he's busy ignoring but from the descriptions you get of it, he really shouldn't be.

I really wasn't sure what to expect from this from the blurb - it could have been a Rich People Problems novel but it's actually more of a mid life crisis novel. Tom's in denial about his health, doesn't want to tell his wife about his work situation or to deal with the underlying issue in their relationship so he finds an excuse to up and run. He doesn't seem to have anyone in his life that he can talk to properly about things, so you see him find excuses for what he's doing to the people he meets - right up until the point that he can't any more. It's not a long book, but it's got a lot going on and leaves you with some things to think about as it deals with male loneliness, morality and mortality. It doesn't have the level of resolution that I get from my regular reads of mystery and romance - but I enjoyed it never the less and it's a thought provoking read that I think would work really well for book clubs and people who like to read book-club type books.

I struggled with this one I’m afraid. I found the writing style clunky and just didn’t invest in or earn to the main character. One I didn’t finish.

So by the end of this book I can honestly say I’m not interested in either basketball or someone’s mid-life crisis. The unlikely scenario of just keep driving didn’t work for me either. I’m too much of a realist I think.

I have enjoyed Markovits’ previous fiction and did enjoy this new novel. It’s a book that takes the reader on a journey with its protagonist, Tom, as he travels across the USA, from his New York home, to California.

From the outset, it is clear that Tom is struggling: his wife, Amy, had an affair years before and Tom always owed to leave her when Miri, his youngest, went off to college. Also, Tom is sick - there are many repeated references to his symptoms but he dismisses them. They come to a head when he gets to his son’s in California. What is a little implausible is how he leaves NY to take Miri to Pittsburgh and then keeps driving.

I like the way Tom visits people (often impromptu) en route: old friends, lovers. It’s a little unrealistic, I think, how far he travels through the book. Admittedly, readers aren’t privy to all of the places he drives though but it seems too quick in terms of distance. Amy is not a nice character - Markovits doesn’t paint a positive picture of her. But at the end, the family all come together to be with Tom as he starts his treatment.

I did like this but it feels too British in style to be in the voice of an American. I realise that the writer is British-American but the character isn’t. However, perhaps this isn’t important.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the ARC.

Different and thought-provoking!

Tom Layward's wife had an affair. It was several years ago, and they seem to have moved past it but when he drives his youngest daughter to university, he remembers that he promised himself he would leave the marriage when she left home. So, after dropping her off in Pittsburgh, he keeps going with a vague idea of visiting people from his past while ruminating on his health and career issues . . .

I realised whilst reading this one that I actually don't read a lot of novels from a male point of view unless they are thrillers, so this was a real change. Well-written and thoughtful, it certainly made me ponder the situation Tom found himself in, and I was eager to see where it was going. A good read, and one I'm happy to recommend. For me, 4.5*.

My thanks to the publisher for my copy via NetGalley.

Tom takes centre stage in this book, he is a Law Professor on forced leave after a dispute with one of his students, he also has some major unidentified health issues and marriage problems. Tom is counting down the days he feels he has left of family life, because his daughter and youngest child Miri will be leaving for university. He drops her off and finds himself at a completely loose end, on the run trying to figure out what he wants to do with his marriage, his job and his life in general.

We witness the mid-life crisis of a man overcome by a feeling of homelessness who is full of resentments and perceived dependencies.
I did enjoy some of his really astute observations and sentiments, for example when he refers to the ‘heavy tread of middle age’ getting him ever closer to the way he remembers his dad to have been. The way he experiences the role reversal between him and his son, or his reflection that the person you are facing or talk to is never quite the person you have in your mind, are beautifully expressed.

All in all, however I was not really invested in his life or that of his family- it just didn’t seem to be interesting enough to me. Then again, I guess that here lies the actual essence of the book – the unravelling of an ordinary live. So, I can see the point of it, but it did not urge me to turn the pages.

I am grateful to NetGalley and Faber&Faber for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Twelve years ago Toms wife had an affair. He made a pact with himself that he would leave as soon as their youngest child turned eighteen. Now, driving his daughter cross country to University, Tom is on a journey of his own. He is running from a health issue that he is trying to ignore, and a work suspension that he is yet to tell his wife about. So after dropping of his daughter, Tom decides to keep driving with a vague plan of visiting an old friend, an ex girlfriend, his brother, and his son, that ends up being a voyage of discovery...Read it

Loneliness can take anyone, and when Tom has dropped his youngest child off at university, the accumulation of an unhappy marriage and an unfulfilled career combine and cause him to keep driving rather than returning home. As he steers a path west, he meets up with old friends and family and reflects on how he got to where he is now.

It's an intense and very thoughtful book that explores real feelings and is a time of life that isn't often seen in fiction. You're taken along with Tom as he explores his life and neglects his health until it's almost too late. His family and friends offer support to get him through an unexpected turn of events and he moves closer to understanding himself and what he wants by the end. Very readable and very moving, loved it.

I'm definitely showing my age when I say that I'm really enjoying midlife slice of life novels at the moment. This new novel from British-American writer Benjamin Markovits explores empty nest syndrome and a midlife road trip and asks the question - what is left when your kids leave home for college?

Tom is a law professor and father of two, married to Amy. Amy had an affair a decade ago and Tom promised himself that once their youngest child Miriam left for college, he'd leave his wife. That time has arrived and as Tom sets off to settle Miriam into college, he embarks on a road trip, not fully knowing where it is going to take him.

This is one of those books where the characters are sharply drawn and where, though not a huge amount happens, it gets under your skin. Tom isn't always a particularly nice person, nor is his brittle wife, but their redeeming characteristics bubble beneath the surface and we slowly find out what has brought them to this point and where they go from here. Examining midlife, mortality and marriage, The Rest of Our Loves asks the hard questions, to which there are no easy answers. There's a fair bit of basketball chat in here, in case that is off-putting to anyone, don't say you weren't warned! If you enjoy this, I think you'll also enjoy This Is Who We Are Now by [author:James Bailey and Coming Home by Tom Lamont, both of which are refreshing reads that also portray masculinity with nuance and empathy. 4/5 stars

Many thanks to Faber Books for the advance copy via @netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

'...we obviously had, even when things smoothed over, was a C-minus marriage, which makes it pretty to score much higher than a B overall on the rest of your life'.

Years ago, when Amy had her affair, Tom assumed they'd divorce but Amy wanted them to stay together until their youngest, Miri, went off to college. Little did Tom know, when he agreed to stay, that he also agreed to live his life (and his marriage) in some type of vacuum - devoid of any real feelings. He operated on auto-pilot; days subsumed by a routine that allowed him to unthinking roll on to the next day, month and year. When the day finally came to drop Miri, his daughter off at college, he can't even comprehend what should come next. Bereft of a clear next step, he keeps driving. Driving towards his past but also, perhaps, towards his future. Only his undiagnosed health complications remind him it's a new morning. When he reaches the west coast, he finds some answers, and the real truth of what was, what wasn't and what should be.

This is an interesting, character-driven story. Reading it feels like you're in Tom's brain. Almost like reading his diary but more chaotic and impromptu. You feel a sadness for him, having reached middle age and seemingly having nothing. However, by the end, there is a hope that he may have found himself before it's too late. Definitely more of a contemplative read.

'I felt very low. Homeless. Miri was gone, Michael was in L.A. I had no job to go back to'.

There were many times while reading this when I had to set my Kindle down & process my emotions. I’m not sure I can say I enjoyed it because even after finishing I was left with such a deep sense of sorrow & loneliness for Tom but it was undeniably a thought-provoking read.
Despite it being a short book, it packs an emotional punch. It’s one of those stories where it feels like nothing really happens, yet everything does. It hit me in my feelings & I know Tom will stay with me for a long, long time.

★★★★½ ROUNDED UP ⬆️⭐️

I enjoyed this book about a man in his 50s doing a sad and spontaneous road trip across the US – love a road trip novel, love reading about the American sprawl. I liked the writing too; there were some really good lines. There were a few weird moments, especially because the protagonist commented on people's weight and size a bit too much – not sure if was the character or the author though?