Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for allowing me to read and review this book.

I went into this book not having read this author’s previous work and not knowing what to expect and I can say I just absolutely loved it. What a power tale narrated so cleverly by our main character, Tom.

Tom has just reached the middle of his life when he dropped his last child off to university while simultaneously dealing with memories of betrayal from his wife. Does he return home or does he go on a quest to find himself? He decides the latter and drives on an adventure of part road trip across the country and part seeking out old friends, meeting new people and reflecting on his future.

This book dives into men’s mental health and how hard it is to not have anyone understand what is going on in your head. It was an easy yet touching read that dealt with deep topics and I couldn’t put it down. Highly recommend as everyone will find something that will resonate to them in this book.

Once Tom drops his daughter off at college, he decides to keep driving and not return home. He and his wife have been drifting towards this end anyway, so it seems like a perfect opportunity. In the first half of the book he visits old friends and sees how they are now living their lives. By the second half however, his health issues have caught up with him and he needs to make some decisions, including whether to stop drifting and accept the life direction he is moving towards. While I was intrigued by the first half, for me the second half left quite a lot to be desired.

The Rest of Our Lives by Benjamin Markovits.

UK release date 25th March 2025.

Book Review - 4*

The book starts with Tom, the main character revealing that when his son was 12 years old his wife had an affair and that he had decided then that when his daughter leaves home for college he would leave his wife.

The book then fast forwards to just before his daughter leaves home to go to college 12 years later.

Tom drives his daughter to college and then just keeps on driving so the novel could be described as a modern-day take on the original road trip novel a la Jack Kerouac.

I enjoyed the way that we learned more about Tom and his family and friends through Tom thinking back to reveal all their connected backstories whilst reconnecting with old friends and his brother along the way.

His ill health that is dismissed by Tom throughout the book comes to a head whilst visiting his son at his last stop on the journey, culminating in Tom and his family having to take stock of their situation.

I found the book a bit slow to start with and I didn’t know if I was going to enjoy it but as the book progressed along with Tom's road trip I found myself really enjoying the book and the characters in the book.

I would recommend this book with a score of 4 out of 5 stars.

Thank you to NetGalley and Faber & Faber for my ARC e-book copy of the book.

I'm still unclear about my feelings toward this book. It started off with a definite premise - a man whose youngest child has gone to college has to decide whether or not to leave the wife who cheated on him 10 years before. He had always told her that he would stay until the children left. So after he drives the girl to college he just keeps on driving with the pretext, to himself, that he is merely going to see old college buddies and his son.

As the journey continues, however, his health begins to suffer and his plans become even less coherent.

I think it was the second half of the book that had me confused because it seemed to be all about the things he didn't want rather than making any real decisions. His inability to even care for himself became quite monotonous.

There is also quite a bit of narrative about sports (especially basketball) none if which I understood or had an interest in.

So though it started off interesting, I'm afraid I got rather bored towards the end. None of the characters were particularly sympathetic either - the husband was apathetic, the wife was whiny, the son was judgemental and the daughter appeared divorced from relationships with any of them. There's also some casual racism that goes unchallenged and I found that part hard to read.

I simply picked the wrong book. It wasn't for me.

Thankyou to Netgalley and Faber & Faber for the advance review copy.

3.5 ⭐ I am not sure what I really think about this book, I would probably have given it a 3.5 but I rounded it up.
This story is told in first person by Tom. Tom and his wife Amy are quite an odd pair, they don't seem to communicate since Amy admitted to an affair 10 years ago, I'm not really sure if they communicated before that. Tom pledged to stay at the family home until the children left, Michael had already left and it was now Miriam's turn, Amy has serious "empty nest syndrome" issues,
as Tom drove of to deliver Miri to her university residence, Amy was left wondering if Tom would return.
Throughout this book you get Tom's thoughts as he converses with different people in his head as he drives along. When Tom leaves Miri he sets off on a journey with no clear destination but with thoughts to visit people from his past and he ends up at the home of his son Michael. Throughout his journey it becomes clear that Tom has serious health issues, we are repeatedly given his worrying symptoms but are left worrying until the end what is really wrong with him and why no one had insisted that he push for a diagnosis.
I can't say that I was really invested in any of the characters, I am sure that a lot of people will really enjoy this book, the author does go into a lot of detail and there are probably lots of things in the book that we can relate to but sadly it wasn't for me.
Thank you Net Gallery for this ARC, my review is voluntary.

I think I have a thing for this type of novel: the main character reminiscing about his/her life and reflecting on life events that my or may not have altered their life trajectory. I also find fascinating this type of insight into American life; for some reason I find it oddly satisfying leaning about their weird(for me as an European) way of thinking/acting. And from this point of view, The Rest of Our Lives did not disappoint. But the twist at the end really elevated this novel for me, as it forces one to put its own life into prospective. The scare Tom is facing at the end of the novel is in fact my worst nightmare, something I've been thinking a lot about lately. It's also the fact that I've read this novel while dealing with losing my dad. Therefore for me, Tom's story touched me in a rather personal way, as I identified with him, but also what what his family was feeling. I felt that despite all that separates us, his story was in many way my story. And at the end of the day, nothing else matter but to still be here!

Tom has been angry at his wife for many years. His wife had an affair 12 years ago, so Tom thinks he is in the right about everything. He's not.
He's on the wrong side of the culture wars, and it's lost him his job. This book should be called Tom's Long Sulk. Instead of talking things through with his wife, Tom drops his daughter off at college and keeps on driving. This is really unwise, because Tom is unwell. It may be Long Covid or something much more serious.
Tom spends the whole book running away from his wife by visiting his brother, his son, old girlfriends, a racist basketball player and an old colleague.
I wanted to scream and shout at Tom: get out of your own way!

Not my usual type of book so this is perhaps why I didn't enjoy it. It explores the lives of a family at a major turn in their life through Tom's eyes.
Tom is in his mid fifties when his daughter leaves for college. His son left a few years ago and he is left with the prospect of spending time again alone with his wife Amy.
She had an affair years ago and though they still live together, their lives have drifted apart.
His teaching has been called into question and he is on a leave of absence whilst pending review.
He leaves on a road trip to write about America through the experiences of people he meets whilst playing basket ball in local parks.
There are few if any chapters which meant I found it difficult to find a natural break.
The end is left hanging.

Literary fiction often lacks a strong representation of male authors, making this book a refreshing and welcome addition to the genre. Initially, I struggled to connect with the protagonist, but as the story unfolded, I found myself deeply captivated.

The narrative follows Tom as he embarks on a heartfelt journey, starting with dropping off his daughter at college and continuing through America to visit his son. Along the way, he reconnects with old friends and lovers, weaving a story that is both reflective and emotionally resonant.

What I loved most was getting to know Tom on a deeper level—his insecurities, doubts, misgivings, and regrets brought a profound and poignant dimension to the book. This beautifully crafted novel leaves a lasting impression with its exploration of human vulnerability and connection.

I really struggled with this book. I do not think it transfers well to the UK market. It was very American, tedious to read and I did not find it engaging at all. Sorry but this is one of the very rare books that I could not finish. I appreciate being given the opportunity to read it, but it was not for me.

An everyday story about a family whose youngest child Miriam is now going to college. Tom the father is going to take Miriam on his own to settle her into college life as his wife feels it will be to emotional for her. This gives Tom the perfect opportunity to leave his wife for having an affair 12 years earlier and extend his journey into a road trip visiting an old friend from college, his brother, his son and an old girlfriend. Toms has decided to rekindle an ambition to write a book about playing one on one basketball as he journeys from east to west coast America. However despite Toms protests that he is ok, he certainly isn't and ends up in hospital where he undergoes an emergency medical procedure. Beautifully written, recommended.

This sounded an interesting premise of a book, maybe a Harold Fry type journey with a man looking to understand his life and relationships by travelling physically away from them whilst going on an inner journey.
Having read the author's biography at the beginning of the book, I was surprised to find the story so American and, not being interested in basketball, I found parts of it hard to follow.
I also struggled with the lack of chapters and almost stream of consciousness writing,so much so that I'm sorry to say I didn't finish the book
Thank you to netgalley and Faber and Faber for an advance copy of this book.

I was intrigued by the premise of this book. Perhaps because I’m about to reach the point of the empty nest myself and have been quietly asking myself the same questions as the narrator. What’s next? What am I going to do with the rest of my life?

But there, any similarities between me and Tom Layward end. The feeling that there is a cutting of ties when his daughter Miri leaves for college is as much him cutting ties with his past as her cutting the apron strings and entering adult life. And arguably, it could be said that Tom is also looking to enter adult life in some ways.

Tom, for all that he is married and has two adult children, had led a sheltered life in academia. He is also very self-contained and apparently unemotional, frustratingly so to his wife, it seems. But there is a persistent air of disappointment and ennui that pervades the book. Even as he sets off on his road trip away from his past with Amy towards a future filled with… who knows what else, he seems only partly engaged in the process. Passive, even as he chooses his waypoints.

The animation and humour that drew me in at the beginning of the book flatten across its length. For all that it comes to feel like a farewell tour, it’s not Tom saying his adieus to his old life or the people he meets along the way. At the end of the book, the conclusion can only be that Tom, in trying to set a course to the future, is forced to accept that he cannot escape himself.

It’s perhaps not as satisfying an ending as I would have expected or hoped, and Tom’s passivity rankles. As last hurrahs go, this is more whimper than bang. Perhaps that’s why this works: while not quite an antihero, you wouldn’t think of Tom as being the main character, either.

And perhaps that realism, and celebration of a resolutely ordinary man, is revolutionary in its own way in a world where American exceptionalism and the raging egos of Trump and Musk fill our newsfeeds, and all the more welcome for it.

A thought-provoking and poignant exploration of life, relationships, and the passage of time. The author’s prose is reflective, capturing the complexities of human emotions with subtlety and depth. The author excels in portraying the nuances of everyday life, making the characters' experiences feel both universal and deeply personal. It reflects on the choices we make in life over time.

A thought provoking read. Maybe the the true American story? A life of disappointment, striving for more, the desire to find oneself?

When Tom’s wife cheats on him, he resolves to leave her once his youngest child leaves home. After he discovers that she has had an affair, they agree to stay together for the children and until their daughter Miriam turns eighteen years of age. That time has now arrived as he drives his daughter Miri across America to university, then continues driving and decides to look up friends and family from his past.

It is an impulse, snap decision and a really engaging moment in the book - he just keeps on driving. We sense that Tom , the main character, feels like he is on the cusp of change in several ways, after issues with his job he is now on leave, there is a mysterious and persistent health issue which evryone tells him he should get checked out. This spontaneous trip provides a turning point for what he really wants from the rest of his life.

The book is split into three parts with no chapters and reads like a stream of consciousness. the pacing starts quite slow, sometimes it can feel "rambling" as it is a stream of consciousness which includes lots of menial details - which mauybe makes the character's plight feel more authentic. It's a moving read, definitely thought proviking an incites you to think about your own life's curveballs, and how you would handle the same scenario.

I hadn’t heard of Benjamin Markovits before but I was intrigued by the blurb, so I applied to read it. This book won’t turn your world upside down but it is a lovely story, with very believable characters, and plausible situations – although if someone had Tom, our narrator’s symptoms, one would hope they would go to a hospital sooner.

Tom is married to Amy. They have 2 beautiful children – first Michael, then Miriam (Miri). When Michael is young and Miri is tiny, Amy has an affair. They carry on, so as to keep the home together for the children, but Tom decides that when Miri leaves home, he will leave. Amy suspects and is just waiting for something to happen, so the marriage is not a comfortable one. However, they muddle along. When Miri goes to University Tom drives her. When he drops her off, he just decides to carry on driving – to see various old friends, and ultimately to stay with their son Michael. Unfortunately, the trip doesn’t quite go as planned, and Tom and Amy are forced to evaluate what is really important.

I really enjoyed the book, but I felt the ending was a bit rushed and not very satisfying. Otherwise I would have given it 5 stars.

https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/7347221313
https://maddybooksblog.blogspot.com/2025/03/the-rest-of-our-lives-by-benjamin.html

Thank you NetGalley and Faber and Faber Ltd for this eCopy to review

Benjamin Markovits' The Rest of Our Lives is a quietly powerful novel that resonated with me long after I turned the last page. Cantered on the life of Tom Layward, the story begins with a significant milestone: dropping his daughter off at university. This bittersweet moment serves as the springboard for a journey—both literal and metaphorical—that takes Tom across America and into the depths of his memories.

As Tom navigates the open roads, we are introduced to fragments of his past: old friends, former flames, and pivotal moments that shaped the man he is today. Alongside these encounters, Tom confronts pressing issues in the present, including his health, aging, and the complexities of his marriage. The road trip becomes a canvas for reflection, as he grapples with choices he made and the life he has built.

What struck me most was the novel’s pacing—it mirrors the rhythm of life itself, with moments of quiet contemplation interrupted by bursts of emotional intensity. Markovits does an exceptional job of capturing the nuances of middle age, balancing humour with poignancy. Tom’s internal dialogue feels authentic, making it easy to empathize with his journey of self-discovery.

While the novel's introspective tone might not suit everyone, I found it deeply rewarding. The interplay between past and present is skilfully woven, and the landscapes described evoke a sense of wanderlust that complements Tom’s personal exploration.

The Rest of Our Lives is a thought-provoking and beautifully written meditation on family, identity, and the roads we take—both figuratively and literally.

‘The Rest of Our Lives’ is a novel about people, family and how events from the past can help form our future. It’s also a great read which I’m sure will sweep you along with Tom, the lead character, as he traverses the country in search of himself.
Thoroughly recommend.

Toms wife had an affair. he vowed to leave her when his daughter finally left home. and so 12 years later when this day comes about, he drops her at university and just keeps driving. where to? why? with no clear plan or destination in mind he does have people to visit along the way. there is also his health issues. is he running? is he running to? is he just avoiding his wife and the decision he is now forced to decide upon having made the pact with himself all those years ago? leaving would be hard. but staying with somone who betrayed you completely?
i felt everything and all the things in this book. i felt too much! i was finding myself emotional just by the writing style. it seemed to flow and infiltrate your waking hours. having you thinking or feeling about it whether the book is in your hands or not.
it was seamless writing for me.
the added layer of not knowing what was wrong with Tom until the end was both good and bad. because i wanted to help him make the decisions based on what level of "ill" he was. and i wondered how this might dictate what he was doing or going to do. because was he saying goodbye? or just avoiding his wife and health issues?
a wonderful book. i could recommend it more.
one you will want in proper copy to sit on your bookshelf forever.

I failed to finish this book I’m afraid. Although I was invested in the characters to an extent, they, the slow development of the story and the grammar/typo errors throughout were becoming increasingly annoying. In the end I felt I was wasting my time reading something I was not enjoying, sorry!