I wish the reasonings for why Schroeder was doing what he was doing were weaved into the story, so I could follow along with why we’re doing the horrible things. It felt too disjointed by the end and I was constantly asking what we were doing. Some of this was difficult to read but folks that are less squeamish or maybe into more extreme horror shouldn’t have any issues.

Schroeder is a trip through the mind of a young man who has been beaten down in life and has reached a tipping point. The reader is dropped right Into the day Schroeder explodes. We are in his mind. We are trying to direct long and meandering thoughts that threaten to drown us in run-on sentences. I haven't read anything else by this author. I don't think I'd like reading this style for very long. However, it kept my mind racing along with Schroeder as he blended thoughts about his life, everything he sees and hears, and his calm killing of people throughout his town. I don't want to give too many details but Schroeder is dark and complex. You don't have to agree with what he is thinking to grow to understand how he came to be where he is. It's not a fun read. You have to be in the right headspace to read this book.

A dark and compelling read that sucked me in and kept me hooked every time I picked it up. Told as a stream-of-consciousness account, we follow Schroeder on what turns to be quite the day, as he goes around killing people in violent, gory, splatter-filled ways. And yet, he might not necessarily be the bad guy...

I was really impressed with how I was able to empathise with the lead character not just with the sections from his diary that round this story out, tie everything off, and confirm what you've probably already worked out, but by his musings and observations of the world as he cycles from each of his destinations. There was something engrossing about it that humanised him; you almost forgot what he'd been describing just a few pages earlier.

This isn't for anyone with a sensitive stomach, that's for sure, or short attention spans - the long, winding sentences take a bit of getting used to but once they click you can really fall into them and see the world through Schroeder's eyes. The diary section at the end was a little cute, but it worked and still didn't explain - or at least confirm - every single little thing, and we only have one narrator so who knows what the truth really was...

I felt like this book is almost a modern-day, better written and (slightly) less problematic version of Rage by Stephen King. The way we're with the killer, and we get inside their head...it all feels very Charlie Decker.

⚠️⚠️Trigger warnings and spoilers⚠️⚠️
Suicide, murder, intense bullying, child abuse, domestic violence


You can only do so much to a person until they finally snap.
We are taken deep inside the mind of a serial killer, named Schroeder.
His thoughts, observations, and reflections will engulf you in a hypnotic, melancholic trance. As he ruminates, so will you.
As he takes you to his thought process you'll feel consumed with the mind vomit -it is disturbing yet insightful. You'll find out he is actually a pretty smart, kind, yet tortured soul.
Some of his opinions or ideals I don't necessarily agree or conform with whilst others are sensible and highly relatable, strong feelings of sharing the same sentiments esp about social commentaries.
You have to be on the right mindset to read this as the 'stream of consciousness' type of writing style is a bit strange, tedious and confusing to follow if you are not accustomed to it. This is very similar to Stephen Graham Jones style and reminds me of 'Night of the Mannequins' which I enjoyed so maybe that's why I'm kinda used to this style.

As he takes us through all the negative and positive thoughts, the recollection of events he went through, the broken dreams, sadness and disappointments. His progressively worsening mental state unfolds and we witness his ultimate self destruction.
You'll find out at the end part of the book that there is more to the story than just existential dread and well-planned killing rampage.

Excerpt from his diary entries:
"June 23, 2023 Each day is worse than the last. Two days ago, I picked out mom’s urn and now she’s on the radio in the living room. I can’t believe this is my life now. It’s like I’m in some terrible nightmare and I have no idea how I got here. The feelings I’m having are awful and sad and persistent and I just want them to go away. I’m having constant headaches and taking Ibuprofen three and four at a time to try and ward them off, but they’re not helping much. All I do is stumble around the house half alive/ half dead looking at things I don’t recognize. The most important person in my life is gone. The only person to ever truly cherish and love me. I feel so lonely so lonely so lonely."

Wow. This one is pretty heavy and deep. I was overwhelmed with emotions and tears unexpectedly welled up in my eyes while reading the diary entries from 2008-2023. . It's like you kinda want to reach out to that ten year old boy and give him a big hug and wish for everything to be all right for him not to end up so messed up. But some things just can't be helped. This is an example of 'Hurt people, hurt people.' to the extreme. The consequences of having battered child syndrome; constant bullying, belittling and harassment at home, at school at work; the devastation of losing your only support system and just ultimately losing faith in humanity. This book will teach us about compassion, remind us to always think of our actions and to always try to be kind - for people are fighting battles we don't know about.

One of his redeeming qualities that I would love to highlight is that he loves and is kind to animals 👏 I was pretty anxious about the scene with the cat as I was dreading he was also going to kill the poor thing. 🐈‍⬛😻

This is the first book I've read by the author. Kudos! This book will forever haunt me.

Thank you to NETGALLEY, Neal Cassidy and M&S Publishing for the arc 🖤

5✨

This book was not what I thought it was going to be but, the ending was great!
Schroder one day wakes up and everything seems normal but its far from normal, because beneath this façade lies a chilling truth: today, Schroder is about to embark on a dark, twisted journey.
This book takes you inside the mind of Schroder and what is going on into his while on his killing spree… Schroder’s describes his surroundings, his thoughts, and his gruesome crimes.
Towards the end of the book, you see the diary entries, and this is what I feel made the whole book because, you get to see Schroder grow and progress as the main character and ultimately the why behind it all…

Fantastic, upsetting, provocative. This is what it says on the tin--Schroeder goes in a killing spree and we're along for the absolutely fucked up ride. I found Schroeder himself to be complex in his depravity and sadness, loved the set up to each chapter with each of the pictographs, and found the stream of consciousness writing reflective of Schroeder's mental state.

This obviously has quite a bit of gore, but I found it well-described and engaging.

I read this as an e-book and do think that reading it physically would be even more engaging. The e-book for me was just free flowing text. I think the very conscious decisions in structure would be more impactful on paper.

Thank you NetGalley for the incredible ARC.

The stream of consciousness writing was difficult for me to get into, but this character was so utterly bonkers in the darkest ways that my curiosity won out and I continued. This was unique, unsettling. It's slow and intense and suspenseful all at the same time.

*spoilers*

I did not know what to expect when picking up this book, but ultimately Schroeder did not disappoint.

It was hard to root for the protagonist for much of this book as he went down his list. Especially since you had no idea why these people were hand-picked for misfortune. The authors use of stream-of-consciousness throughout worked well with this. Although it was easy to follow, Schroeder’s thoughts felt chaotic, often too-detailed, and at times, too perfectly clear.

Schroeder’s social critiques were often spot-on, however, as I’m sure it was intended, his warped perspective projected onto everything and everyone that crossed his path.

What I didn’t like was how often the story fell into a cliche. At times, it made the story one-dimensional. I was pulled out of the narrative when dialogue or plot was too exaggerated. (For example: the father and son playing catch and ending with a hug and a kiss or the kids at the keg party in the middle of the afternoon hitting every high-school stereotype in one fell swoop).

To expand on this, Schroeder’s diary was typical of what you would see in an after-school special depicting domestic/child abuse, but the issue is so much more layered than what is given here. It also seemed so unbelievable (as the reader) to witness Schroeder and his mother being treated the way they were by the principal, and Schroeder’s co-workers. I have never encountered such a concentrated group of cruel human beings. And, the two big question: How did it take so long for someone to find him? What are the odds that everything went so according to plan? I was waiting for a wife or boyfriend or even some kids to be home, maybe someone willing to fight a little bit harder for their life.

However, I could understand if this was all done purposely. And in the end, regardless of the tropes, you feel for Schroeder when he speaks of his mother and holds her urn in his arms. Even the journal entries make their point. In a few sentences, Schroeder lays out all the ways a human can be hurt in this world and it is hard not to hurt with him and for him. By the end of his story, you are empathizing with the killer. Schroeder is humanized. And because of this, I feel this novel is worth the read.

Wow. I really enjoyed this book. This writer knows what he is doing. Basically the premise is your in this person's mind and you are following him around while he commits horrible acts to others. You get small clues through the book on why he is committing these acts and how's he feels about the world. Highly recommend. Really till the end.

I thought the psychological thriller element in this book worked so well. I thought the use of social commentary really added to the story and of the realism of the characters. I enjoyed getting to know this world and characters. Neal Cassidy has a great overall concept of the genre and it shows in the writing, I’m excited to read more from Neal Cassidy.

This book was something else! I wasn’t sure how I feel about it as I was reading it and then at the end, I was blown away. Schroder wakes up one day in his normal seemingly normal life, in his normal neighborhood, and it seems like he’s going to go about his normal day. He gets on his bike and goes to a store. There, he kills to men. From there, he goes on a killing spree cycling to different locations.

This is not your typical book. If you ever wanted to get inside the mind of a killer on a spree, this is the kind of book you may want to read. Though, the mind may not be what you think. Written in stream of consciousness, you’ll get the description of his surroundings, and yes, the description of the kills. Some of them a little more gruesome than the others.

I did struggle a bit with the author’s choice of how it was written. I didn’t understand that choice other than to really get into Schroeder’s mindset. It felt very rumbled with the run on sentences.

What really got me, and what really made this book come together, were the diary entries at the end. It changed my whole perspective of the book, of Schroeder himself. The progression and growth of Schroeder was seen through the entries as well as his hope. That really was the perfect touch.

Picked this up on a whim from Netgalley and loved it.
Instead of seeing all the thrilling crazy things a killer is up too from the victim or the investigator, you are getting the story from the killers POV.

I enjoyed that switch up, it was refreshing.
This was such a fun but imo fast paced thriller and I need more written like this.
Is this random, is there a pattern and why...
Why is a killer?