"You said your mum described her thirties as that time when everything is on fire..."

And isn’t that relatable?
Millennials Sam and Daisy, two best friends, navigate their 30s in London, trying to find their purpose and path in life. Though they are inseparable, they have very different views on what their future should look like. Sam, newly married, is planning to start a family, but this comes with unexpected struggles. Daisy, on the other hand, feels lost—trapped in a job she hates, caught in toxic relationships with men, and unsure of her true purpose.
Their story is told over four summers and four winters, and it's really well-paced, which allows us to truly experience the ups and downs of their journey.

One of the aspects I loved most was that the story is told from both perspectives, letting us understand each character’s emotions and personalities.

Sam and Daisy are incredibly relatable, each with their own quirks and flaws. As someone in her late 30s, I found their experiences familiar—the societal expectations that come with this decade of life: marriage, children, buying a home, and securing a stable, well-paying job. Over the course of four years, their friendship is tested by betrayals, disagreements, and emotional distance, but ultimately, it is also filled with love, hope, and understanding.

The author does a fantastic job of tackling important topics, particularly the struggles of infertility and a subtle yet important mention of postpartum depression. Sam’s pain, guilt, and emotional turmoil are written with such authenticity that it mirrors the real-life experiences of many women facing infertility. The novel also highlights how society often assumes that marriage must immediately lead to parenthood, with people thoughtlessly asking intrusive questions without considering what a couple might be going through. This is something we should all be more mindful of.

Another aspect I truly enjoyed was how Kerry explores the alternative choice—choosing not to become a mother. Daisy struggles with this idea, but we also see her inner conflict about how society might perceive her decision. As a mother myself, I completely understand and respect those who decide not to have children. I firmly believe that no woman should feel pressured to compromise on this decision. Motherhood is hard—it changes you, sometimes making you feel like you’ve lost yourself. It can alter relationships and take a long time before you feel like yourself again. Of course, not everyone has the same experience, but I loved how this book touches on these realities in such an honest way.

Above all, this novel beautifully illustrates the importance of female friendship—how, even when we choose different paths, we can still support each other without judgment, without dismissing one another’s values, emotions, or experiences.

This is a beautifully written story about life in your 30s, adulthood, love, friendship, and the pressures society places on us. A very relatable read.

That Time Everything Was On Fire by Kerry Downes is a heartfelt exploration of friendship, love, and the changes that come with adulthood. Sam and Daisy have been inseparable since university, sharing memories of wild nights out and youthful adventures. Daisy, the free-spirited girl from the Yorkshire Moors, and Sam, who spent her youth in Liverpool, have always leaned on each other for support. But as they sit together in the garden of their favourite local pub, watching Sam’s wedding unfold, neither of them knows that their lives are about to take very different paths.

As Sam’s yearning for motherhood grows, and Daisy struggles with her self-destructive tendencies, the two women find themselves drifting apart. Each decision, each unintentional betrayal, creates a wider gap between them. The novel revolves around the challenges of navigating personal desires, relationships, and careers while maintaining friendship, especially as the characters enter their early thirties. Can Sam and Daisy rebuild the bond they once shared, or will the distance between them be irreparable?

The book unfolds across four summers and four winters, offering a structured and thoughtful look at the passage of time. Downes’ debut novel is well-paced, with moments of emotional depth and sharp insight into the complexities of friendships during pivotal life stages. Although the themes explored may not feel entirely new, the writing is strong and the characters relatable, making it a compelling read for fans of emotional, character-driven stories like those by Holly Bourne.

That Time Everything Was On Fire is a warm, engaging look at how friendships evolve, the pressures of adulthood, and the struggles of trying to stay connected when life seems to pull you in different directions.

Read more at The Secret Book Review.

this was good, but also felt like it was too long? and why were daisy and james/jono/blake so intense with eachother so fast? and why were they all SO posh but acting like they weren't? and why was sam so obsessed with daisy and james being together? and I will forever seethe when characters just argue instead of just saying what they mean.
I think maybe I'm just the wrong reader for this book, which is surprising as a woman in her thirties, so I don't want to shit on it, but I also just can't sing it's praises.
thank you to Netgalley for the ARC :)

A really good, realistic and sensitive portrayal of female friendships in your thirties. I really identified with aspects of all the characters in this book and found it a joy to read.

I think it's not easy to portray the struggles and pain of infertility in a literary form, but "That Time Everything Was On Fire" comes quite close to it. Even though this is only one of the issues explored in this book, it may be quite important one for some readers, especially that it's showcased not only in the marital/romantic relationship context, but also a broader social one.

The main subject of this book, however, is friendship between Sam and Daisy. Written from the points of view of each woman, it creates a complex landscape on navigating a type of relationship that there are very few recipes for, especially when it comes to resolving conflicts and managing fallouts in the context of major life events or difficulties.

What is really admirable, is how this book is structured. From the subtle foreshadowing in the wedding chapter, to how the story is organised. No unnecessary longueurs such as describing the character's looks or daily routines in the detail, but pure essence that serves to move the story forward. It's at times challenging, at times heartbreaking but overall an uplifting read that may give hope to those who became distant from their friends and hope for reconciliation.

A lovely story, written over the course of a number of years and following the developing and changing landscape of the friendship between Sam and Daisy.
The characters are excellent and have such clear voices and the storyline touches on a number of issues facing women in their late 20's through to their early 40's and maybe beyond so resonates via shared experience.

That Time Everything Was On Fire is about a millennial friendship group (with a focus on BFFs Sam and Daisy), navigating motherhood, relationships, careers and the the impact of these on their friendship in their early-30s.

The plot moved along at a good pace, helped by the framing of the story over four summers and four winters. Although this is Downes' debut novel, the writing felt accomplished and I certainly look forward to any future books from her.

Ultimately the story doesn't really cover any new ground, but nevertheless it was an incredibly enjoyable and relatable read that's perfect for fans of Holly Bourne.

A lovely modern novel all about long-term friends, and how relationships change. Themes include marriage, loss, pregnancy, pregnancy loss, IVF, modern relationships. I really enjoyed this and would love to read more by Kerry Downes in the future - I loved that she knows Whitby/that area of North Yorkshire so well!!!

This is a well structured book with a compelling, plot and important subject matter. I like the way it focused on the changes and decisions that can happen in your thirties. It was an easy read, well written and I especially liked the choice of scenes/vignettes that flow through the book. Beautiful cover, too, that fits with the book.

I struggled a bit with most of the characters and didn't feel a lot of affection for them, except Sam.

This is a promising debut. I'll be interested to see what the author writes next.