This Way Out
by Tufayel Ahmed
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Pub Date 1 Jul 2022 | Archive Date 15 Jul 2022
Amazon Publishing UK | Lake Union Publishing
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Description
It’s time everyone knew the truth, and what better way to announce you’re getting married (and gay) than on your family WhatsApp group?
Amar can’t wait to tell everyone his wonderful news: he’s found The One, and he’s getting married. But it turns out announcing his engagement on a group chat might not have been the best way to let his strict Muslim Bangladeshi family know that his happy-ever-after partner is a man—and a white man at that.
Amar expected a reaction from his four siblings, but his bombshell sends shockwaves throughout the community and begins to fracture their family unit, already fragile from the death of their mother. Suddenly Amar is questioning everything he once believed in: his faith, his culture, his family, his mother’s love—and even his relationship with Joshua. Amar was sure he knew what love meant, but was he just plain wrong?
He’s never thought of his relationship with Joshua as a love story—they just fit together, like two halves of a whole. But if they can reconcile their differences with Amar’s culture, could there be hope for his relationship with his family too? And could this whole disaster turn into a love story after all?
A Note From the Publisher
Available Editions
EDITION | Other Format |
ISBN | 9781542037617 |
PRICE | US$14.95 (USD) |
Featured Reviews
The overall premise is great the first few chapters felt like it was trying to cater a non Muslim, non Bangledeshi, non immigrant audiance. Throughout the first few chapters the narrator is telling me of the cultural stakes of coming out to his family instead of allowing the story to show me which slows down the pacing significantly. I'm not Muslim, nor Bangledeshi, nor from an immigrant family and I think that story would have benefited from dropping the reader into Amar's world and shown the stakes without holding their hand. For this reason, I didn't finish the book.
Enjoyable book. I thought that it was an emotional story and I found the main character and the family very intriguing. I am looking forward to future work by Tufayel Ahmed.
A fantastic debut about coming out, grief, navigating family, religion, self love, self acceptance, and love.
Amar, is a queer, Bangladeshi Muslim, who was born and raised in East London, who after 3 years is still dealing with his mothers death. Recently engaged to the love of his life Joshua, Amar decides it is finally time to come out to his family. He decides to send a message in the family group text and come out to his siblings en masse. He meets up with all of them a few days later to talk in person and it is safe to say it does not go well. This oldest sister and brother do not take it well and question him and his "decision" to be gay. Amar tries to explain himself and how much he has struggled over the years but they don't see reason and none of his other siblings stand up for him. His partner Josh does his best to help him through it, as does his welcoming family, but everything seems to be crumbling around him. He begins going to therapy, reluctantly at first, and working out his issues, but not without some bumps in the road.
This story really shows the perspective finding yourself in a culture and religion that seems to condemn who you are. What being an ally really is, and how you always have to strive for better to understand the difference and challenges those in your life are facing. How you can always grow as a person and work towards fighting your biases.
7/10
This Way Out is a contemporary fiction about Amar, a 28 year old gay, Bangladeshi, Muslim man coming to terms with his religion and sexuality. It follows him as he tells his family he is gay and engaged to a white man he's been dating for two years, starting therapy, his job at a bookstore that is going out of business, and grieving over the loss of his mother three years prior.
I loved the character development that both Amar and his boyfriend, Joshua, have and how their relationship grows together. They both come to terms with the fact that they have been avoiding discussion certain things about their relationship but that the fault is not on one of them, but on both of them. I also really enjoyed Amar being able to find and connect with other queer Muslim's in the area. Finally, I appreciated that Amar's family is not seen as lesser than Joshua's family, and it's shown that they all have issues because they are all human.
While I enjoyed the character development, for the first half of the story I thought Amar was annoying and thought about not finishing because it was difficult for me to like him. I also felt some parts were repetitive.
Unwilling to continue keeping his sexuality secret forever, and still grieving the loss of his mother, overwhelmed and struggling Amar decides the best way to let his strict Muslim Bangladeshi family know he is engaged to Joshua is through a group WhatsApp message. When sharing his truth sends shockwaves through his family, Amar is forced to question everything he once believed. As cracks begin to show in his relationship, and his family seem more fractured than ever, can Amar find his happy ending?
First, I'll say the story of This Way Out deserves five stars. I have never before read an Own Voices book about a gay second-generation British Muslim Bangladeshi man, and I thought the author did an excellent job at navigating the nuances of identity; sexuality; culture; religion; microaggressions; grief; and much more. Not to mention addressing mental health through cultural, religious and gendered complexities. Amar is a complex and troubled protagonist, and I thought he was characterised very well; the love for his family battling with the inherent need to live truthfully and without shame. I loved seeing open representations of therapy on the page; showing a committed couple working through deeply complex issues in supportive and loving ways; and seeing Amar attend the inclusive mosque with his LGBTQIAP+ friends.
Unfortunately, I really disliked the narrative style of the book. This comes down to personal preference, in the end. Absolutely everything is told to the reader, which makes it a very easy read in some ways, but also a fairly detached and emotionally flat one. It might be sensible to consider This Way Out as a series of journal entries, or a long inner monologue, because everything is told from a psychological distance, I found it quite a shame, because the content and depth of the story itself gets richer and richer as the book goes on, and I do think this is a fundamentally important book to read, but I wish it had been written in a more engaging style, to make it more like a novel and less like a report. That's why I've averaged out my rating to 3.5*, rounded up to 4.
I would say that I think the book is somewhat mis-marketed. From the blurb, I was expecting a kind of romcom, but actually the book deals with very deep and tough topics. While important, they are not light or fluffy in any respect, and from the beginning of the story it's clear that the crux of the conflict will be concerning the matter of whether Amar can manage to stay true to himself without having his family turn their backs on him for religious and cultural reasons, which would obviously be quite complex and difficult reading material for some.
cw: religious trauma; racism; Islamophobia; f-slurs; homophobia; grief; depression
28 Amar has to deal with the fall out of coming out to his Muslim family, and how it affects him. This was a heartwarming novel that deals with some heavy and important subject matter. The writing fell a bit flat for me, but I look forward to the author's future books.
I like the idea of this book.... but the execution is lacking. The characters are half-baked and the first bit of exposition just flew by me. I can't really care about his depressive episode when I just learn about him and his mom's death two paragraphs ago. this book is an example of an author that told instead of showing.
DNF at chapter 9/25%
I feel the blurb on this was a bit misleading. I was expecting a cute romcom, where the heavier topics of religion, race and sexuality weren’t quite as prominent. I believe this is the reason I couldn’t really get into the story, since I was prepared for something quite different.
That being said, I found no flaws in the autor’s writing or the story itself. I feel like this story is very unique and has representation I don’t feel is explored much, especially own voices, and is certainly not present in most of the books i usually read. I think it would be highly impactful for something going through the same thing as our main character - dealing with coming out to your muslim family, not knowing exactly how they´ll react. I did feel like this is a book I could really learn from and that could open my eyes to a different perspective than my own. I will definitely try this story again when I am a bit more emotionally prepared for the turmoil...
I give it 1 star simply because it was a DNF, and my full thoughts are required to give a fair (and probably higher) star rating.
This book really just melted my whole soul. I wish it had come out during Pride Month because it would've been the PERFECT time to debut!
Thank you for the chance to read an arc of this book.
This book brought up so many important topics and I liked that it didn’t let people get away with ignorance or micro aggressions. The story handled mental health in a very respectful way once Amar had accepted that seeing a therapist wasn’t just for white people, and I enjoyed his journey to self love.
While I did enjoy the story, please be aware that there are numerous size shaming remarks throughout the book.
I LOVE LOVE LOVED Amar. This coming out story was a brilliant masterpiece ! Being brown in a predominately white country is definitely known to have it's trials and tribulations. But to be brown, gay, Muslim, and in a relationship with a white man, that almost unheard of ?
Haha or so Amar thinks. Reading Amar's story and getting to see how he navigates through the difficult issues that he is facing in his life was so much fun. Granted he is dealing with hard issues for some and things that can be very sensitive but the story is about growth and acceptance of ones self. Learning that you don't need your family to accept you to validate you, and who you truly are.
This story was just so well told I wish I hadn't read it as quickly as I do. Don't mind me while I go and run to add this to my Amazon cart so I can have a physical copy for my shelves.
This Way Out is beautiful, emotional, and such a great story of Amar figuring out how to reconcile being gay with being Muslim, being Bangladeshi while loving a white Englishman.
This Way Out opens with Amar telling his family via WhatsApp that he’s engaged and his fiancée is a man, but then he hides from the responses from his siblings because he doesn’t actually feel ready for what their response will be. His family’s reaction is complicated and because he’s still coping with grief of his mother’s death three years prior, the prospect of losing his family causes him to spiral, which is further compounded by learning the bookshop that he works at and that kept him afloat in many ways is about to be forced to close and dealing with racist microaggressions and unconscious bias from his future mother-in-law.
I expected more of a romance novel, but this is much more just Amar’s story and emotional journey. I loved seeing his emotional growth and how much therapy helped him learn better communication and coping skills. I found this difficult to put down and it hits so many different emotional beats, but I promise there is a happy ending and so many things are resolved in the best way they could be. I loved this book and highly recommend it for an emotional contemporary story full of heart and warmth.
I gave it 4 stars.
Here's why;
First of all, I liked how realistic the events were. It was a cute story with events of real life, I liked the portrayal of characters. Life is not always happy but this book shows how to get through.
I also enjoyed reading Amar and Joshua's love story, I don't want to label it as gay romance because it's a romance book. Love is love after all.
This book is highly recommended and if you read this you won't be dissapointed. I really enjoyed reading this.
“People are more concerned by what two men or two women do in bed than about love. Love is companionship, feeling content and safe in the arms of another person. It is the mundane moments when you know the other person is there but you don’t need to speak-their presence is enough, the meals shared, the walks taken, not just sex. What is so wrong about that?”
Publisher: Lake Union Publishing
Release date: July 1st 2022
Pages: 268
Representation: Bangladeshi Muslim, LGBTQIA+ (Gay MC, Pansexual side character).
Trigger warnings: Homophobia, Islamophobia, parental death, depression, anxiety, Racism, mention of AIDS, mention of COVID pandemic.
Summary: *This is the official synopsis provided by publishers, as it’s relevant to the review below.* Amar can’t wait to tell everyone his wonderful news: he’s found The One, and he’s getting married. But it turns out announcing his engagement on a group chat might not have been the best way to let his strict Muslim Bangladeshi family know that his happy-ever-after partner is a man—and a white man at that.
Amar expected a reaction from his four siblings, but his bombshell sends shockwaves throughout the community and begins to fracture their family unit, already fragile from the death of their mother. Suddenly Amar is questioning everything he once believed in: his faith, his culture, his family, his mother’s love—and even his relationship with Joshua. Amar was sure he knew what love meant, but was he just plain wrong?
He’s never thought of his relationship with Joshua as a love story—they just fit together, like two halves of a whole. But if they can reconcile their differences with Amar’s culture, could there be hope for his relationship with his family too? And could this whole disaster turn into a love story after all?
This way out shows us that all types of love can be found in the most unexpected of places; no matter how complicated and messy.
As a white, non-religious reader I will never understand the struggles of the main character in this book yet it still resonated with me. I don’t want to comment on any of the representation of Bangladeshi Muslim experiences, and would encourage you to find reviews by members of this community. I looked at other reviews for this title, and was surprised by the amount of low-rated reviews by white women because they expected the book to be a romantic comedy from the synopsis. That felt ironic, and entirely representative of the message of the book.
Amar was a realistic, imperfect character. He made choices I didn’t agree with, but he never shied away from confronting his own issues.It hit me with a wave of emotion. I nearly cried more than once-with both heartbreak and joy. Him and Joshua were such a loving couple, despite their differences, and I loved watching them grow together. I loved the de-stigmatisation of therapy as a self-help tool and the commentary on its inaccessibility. I loved the inclusion of forums as a tool-because they are still alive and well in 2022, and are such a valuable tool for finding community. I also loved the focus on the importance of independent bookstores. They really are an important part of all communities.
The plot was easy to follow and made it hard to put the book down. I read the entire thing in less than a day because I wanted to know what happened next. I wasn’t disappointed, and I honestly couldn’t predict what was going to happen.
By the end, it left me with a warm fuzzy feeling inside. It didn’t end perfectly for Amar, but it ended happily. It’s an important distinction and I hope that everyone eventually learns what he did. That It’s okay to be imperfect, and no matter how alone you feel there is always someone out there with similar experiences. You’re good enough, no matter your sexuality, skin colour, religion and family history. In the end, nothing should stop you from being who you are.
Its shining glory: The story and writing style made it a beautifully emotional read. It strikes a chord that leaves behind a hole when it ends.
Its fatal flaw: At moments it felt like Amar's breakthroughs were rushed; he went through a huge emotional journey in a short amount of time, and as someone that has struggled with depression and anxiety it felt very rushed. It almost
Read this if: You want a hard-hitting LGBTQIA+ read about someone coming to terms with himself. You like books with realistic characters-that make questionable decisions even if they’re a good person.
Skip this if: You don’t like character-driven stories that heavily feature internal monologue. You don’t like books that focus on personal issues or where the main character makes imperfect decisions.
I really enjoyed this read! With such an interesting premise, This Way Out follows main character Amar has he navigates his engagement to fiancé Joshua and simultaneously coming out to his Bengali family. It explores both queerness and race and the way the two intersect whilst Amar also deals with the grief of losing his mother.
I found at times characters could be quite one dimension wishing for more depth such as in Amar's relationship with his sister- although this could just be a symptom of first person narrative. The plot itself however was really well paced- never feeling rushed.
This is a super important read that covers lots of questions that should be being asked. 3.5/5! (Rounded up)
<i>Thank you to Netgalley, Lake Union Publishing, and Amazon Publishing for an eARC!</i>
An emotional, heartwarming and heartbreaking story. While it deals with heavy topics such as issues around race and religion, it is in no way grim. Over all it was an enjoyable read. Fans of contemporary romance will get their fill here!
Thank you, Lak Union Publishing, for allowing me to read This Way Out early.
Don't be fouled by the cover or the synopsis. I saw some reviewers saying they expected a romcom and that's not what this book is. This story is emotional and presenting heavier topics but at the same time it's pretty easy readable. I loved to read about the struggles of a Muslim queer man and really liked the overall story.
This one unfortunately was not for me. The writing is pretty bad, the pacing all wrong and I couldn't get into the story.
Such a shame.
TUFAYEL AHMED – THIS WAY OUT *****
I read this novel in advance of publication through NetGalley in return for an honest review.
This debut novel is interesting in so many ways. Told simply by Amar, this is the story of his wedding, his family, and his friends. His gay wedding. To white Joshua. Weddings are notorious, especially in comedies, for bringing out the worst between families. For Amar, the worst comes out long before the wedding.
He expected a confrontation with his family, especially his father, with his traditional beliefs, and one of his brothers, but not from his other siblings.
Nor did he expect a massive confrontation with Joshua’s well-meaning but over-bearing mother, determined to put her white middle-class stamp on the proceedings.
Into this mix comes the gay owner of the bookshop where Amar works, various family members and friends, and a group of gay Muslims who have already gone through what Amar is going through and come out, more or less whole, the other side.
Apart from the simple, easy to read style (perhaps because of the author’s journalistic background) this novel makes you think about your own attitude. Most white people, I would guess, aren’t deliberately racist; they just don’t know enough about other cultures and religions not to make faux pas. Seeing our own attitudes reflected back through Amar’s thoughts is what makes this novel profound and thought provoking. Recommended.
Amar is at a crossroad in his life. He just got engaged to Joshua and needs to tell his Muslim family about their relationship. Like he expected, this doesn't go well at all. What happens next is a spiral of negative events: his relationship comes under great pressure, he's about to lose his job and mentally Amar is barely holding things together. However, this is not a sobbing story only. Without spoiling too much: it gets better for Amar. He reconciles with his faith and his personal growth is very touching.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book. Ahmed Tufayel's writing style is very descriptive, which immediately invited me, a white reader, into the culture and environment he's writing about. Amar's struggles are portrayed in a very moving way and I really felt for the character. I read that some reviewers find Amar whiney throughout the book, I disagree. The cultural differences between Amar and Joshua are portrayed heartbreakingly beautiful and gives a great insight in how, in Western society, we've come to see certain things as so normal that we don't even think about it. The ending, though a bit sappy, had me in tears.
I highly recommend reading this book!
Overall, I enjoyed this book. I found it to be a quick read, with a captivating story and a great cast of supporting characters.
There were times where the writing style didn't really jive with me; it would occasionally slip into a little bit more elementary of a writing style, but I was invested enough in the plot to power through. The story suffers from a little bit more telling than showing at times too, but still I found myself captivated by Amar's journey of identity.
This felt like a really solid draft that maybe could've used a touch more finessing, but I loved the heart of the story.
This book is written beautifully you could tell from the first few pages. Amar is a gay, Muslim, Bangladeshi man who at the beginning of the book is engaged, has not come to his family yet, is struggling with his religion, and dealing with the grief of his mother's death.
This book portrays the aspect of seeking out help for mental health in his community and how it is stigmatized. Which I thought was done beautifully. It also does a great job of depicting depression and isolation.
It also does a great job of portraying an inter-racial relationship and how it takes more than just the couple to be understanding. Love isn't all we need to make a relationship work it's understanding each other and each other's cultures and unconscious bias'. The book is about turmoil and forgiveness. It takes you on the MC's journey, it's a heavy book in my opinion not light reading by any means. It took me a few days to finish it as I had to break it up I couldn't read it all in one sitting like I usually do. But it was great nonetheless.
I believe this book would have benefited from being told from a third person and incorporating viewpoints of more characters. Also, a more extended timeframe of events that could incorporate the seperate nuances of the characters.
In this novel, a gay Bangladeshi Muslim London man uses WhatsApp to announce his upcoming marriage to a white, non-Muslim man. As you might expect, this sounds shockwaves through is family. The novel adeptly, but no heavy-handedly, touches on issues of race, religion, and sexuality.
Amar and Joshua are engaged after two years of dating. You see they met in a bookshop a year after Amar's mother died. Amar has finally decided it's time to come out to his family. He knows it won't be easy especially because he is Muslim and their strong beliefs against same sex marriages. The next year however will prove to test Amar's inner turmoil between blending his religion and sexuality.
This was book was nothing short of beautiful, everything Amar had to endure family he lost as much as family he gained. At first it felt slow but it was as if it was a steady paced read, for the reader to truly understand what Amar as Muslim and as a human being had to endure to feel accepted by himself. Self acceptance is such an important feeling. It touched on diversity, LGBTQIA and mental health, grief. I highly recommend this book to anyone.
5⭐
Thank you to Netgalley, Tufayel Ahmed and Amazon Publishing for this ARC.
Thank you netgalley for this ARC however i got it after publication but im still going to write my review because i LOVED this book so much. This book touched down on so many important conversations regarding cultural traditions, Identity, and just very important conversations this is a very very needed book. This book took such a turn that i was not expecting but its a spoiler so i will not go in detail. I loved the message behind this novel. This book starts off with the romance between Amar and Joshua and amar coming out to his family through a whatsapp group message and the reaction was not the best so basically amar is having to navigate the aftermath of his coming out and the culture beliefs that his family has and religious beliefs which is a huge thing that alot of lgbtq+ people deal with thats why i think this book is so important to have in the world because it could help someone struggling with their identity. It also follows Amar and his new friend group and also touches down on the stigma of therapy in different cultures so it was really beautiful to see the GROWTH that amar took in this novel. Amar was honestly such a great character i loved him! Also he works at a bookstore and the book owner is in jeopardy of losing his bookstore so Amar tries all in his doing to save the shop will he save it? Find out and read this book i loved this book so damn much. The writing was amazing everything was just so good such a page turner. I really love romance novels like this when it has so many twists and turns and its not just your basic romance. ROMANCE LOVERS READ THIS! You will LOVE IT!
This story tells the aftermath of Amar coming out to his Muslim family via group chat. There's a LOT of homophobia in it so it's really hard to read sometimes. It hurts a lot before it starts to get better. I'm writing this as a white girl with no religion, so I have no idea what's like being Muslim, but I could feel the pain he was going through. Amar had to deal with breaking expectations his family had of him, so he got estranged from some of them, split with his white fiancé, but he also found a group of people who he could relate to, and friends to help through it all. Not an easy read but I liked reading his journey.
This read a heavy but very educating read for me. I feel like it should be required reading for heterosexual people so that they understand all of the nuances, emotions and reactions that people within the lgbtqia community face when coming out. While I had a hard time (at times) connecting to Amar it was necessary to truly grasp the journey he was on. Truly a great read!
dnf (25%?) for now. maybe i'll pick it up again, maybe i won't.
i was bored from the get go, and just couldn't get into the story. I didn't care for the main character, and that really disrupts the entire story for me - why would I read about someone I don't like. Personally, I don't like constant mentions of real life media, and the featured, such as the mention of Little Life (a book I dislike for a fair few different reasons), sounded cringe to me. The prose was very repetitive, and all I felt like I was learning, was that this main character was unhappy, there was no other personality or character depth.
Maybe I have to be in the right mood, and maybe I'll eventually give this another go, but for now I'm putting it down to focus on other books I might enjoy.
Focused on Amar and told from his perspective, this story recounts his coming out story: via text. Having recently dropped the news in a family text chain with his siblings. Having done so, he has to deal with the fallout, as well as his upcoming wedding. Balancing the expectations of his Bengali Muslim family with the love of his life, Joshua, with his job and friends on top of it proves to be stressful - to say the least!
The confessional, first person perspective style of this story makes for an intimate peek into the main character's life and thoughts. The book is one that mainly people could relate to: looking to balance found love, acceptance, family with the traditional expectations and pressures of blood relatives. Young people could come to love this book because it holds nothing back and doesn't censure any of Amar's experiences or thoughts.
However, because of the first person POV and the intense focus on the main character, there is a narrative distance between the diary-style story and settings and other characters. Intense introspection takes the place of delicious description of place. We move with the character from a pub to a bookstore, but there's no notion of the smell of the books, the sounds in the pub. The reader gleans characterization from what characters say or do, rather than the timbre of voice, their individual quirks given in beautiful metaphor.
The overall positive message was helpful for those going through a similar experience, but the writing itself could have used much more polish.
3.5
THANKS TO NETGALLEY FOR THE ARC!
This book is really interesting because the mc is a Londoner Muslim man and all the novel is from is pov! It’s not a romance, it’s a contemporary literature, but there is a love story, that is very cute! The two, Amar and Joshua, deeply love each other, but they are in an interracial relationship and it’s not simple. The issues are a lot and they are not great at communication (especially Amar). But they grown and learn and became a better version of themselves.
Beside the love story, this novel is the story of Amar and his journey to lean to love and accept himself and connect who he is with his religion. This is not a simple journey, but it’s necessary for Amar.
As I did it, the book is interesting. And it’s cute. But it’s a bit immature. This is a debut and have a lot of ingenuity. But the author is good and I hope the next book will be better!
This is a story about Amar, a Muslim Bangladeshi guy, who was born in London. His mother died three years ago, and that's why Amar became depressed. One year later he met Joshua and started dating him. Two years after that Joshua proposed to Amar. Now it's time for Amar to come out to his Muslim family as gay. How does he do that? He sends a text to his family WhatsApp group that he's gay and he's going to marry a man.
I'm not really into contemporary romance books. That's why writing style wasn't exactly my cup of tea. There were way too many (for me) descriptions, flashbacks, etc. But I stopped paying attention to it because I just fell in love with both plot and characters.
I'm an aro ace in a pretty homophobic family so Amar's first conversation with his family about being gay was so relatable. I'm glad that the author mentioned all those things like "you're going to hell for being gay", "then why did god create me like that" etc. I think, almost every lgbtqa+ member had a conversation like this at least once in their life.
Also, I really loved Amar and Joshua's relationships. They acted like adults, and their communication was just great. It was nice that Amar went into therapy. Things like this one should be in the media, so everyone could understand that it's okay to ask professionals for help.
This Way Out is a sweet, gay love story that contains multitudes: it features friendships and family relationships that hold depth, an extended coming out story that isn't simple, a character learning to set healthy boundaries and to challenge his partner on racism, and finding meaningful belonging and community. Additionally, anyone who's been on booktok will enjoy the way this book talks about Amar's experiences with booktok.
It’s time everyone knew the truth, and what better way to announce you’re getting married (and gay) than on your family WhatsApp group?
Amar can’t wait to tell everyone his wonderful news: he’s found The One, and he’s getting married. But it turns out announcing his engagement on a group chat might not have been the best way to let his strict Muslim Bangladeshi family know that his happy-ever-after partner is a man—and a white man at that.
Amar expected a reaction from his four siblings, but his bombshell sends shockwaves throughout the community and begins to fracture their family unit, already fragile from the death of their mother. Suddenly Amar is questioning everything he once believed in: his faith, his culture, his family, his mother’s love—and even his relationship with Joshua. Amar was sure he knew what love meant, but was he just plain wrong?
He’s never thought of his relationship with Joshua as a love story—they just fit together, like two halves of a whole. But if they can reconcile their differences with Amar’s culture, could there be hope for his relationship with his family too? And could this whole disaster turn into a love story after all?
Read it in a day with barely any breaks, but the breaks that I took just meant that I was thinking about it and wanted to get back to it! With such believable characters because they are far from perfect, a really gripping read.
I'm very, very conflicted about this one so I shall require a few days to think things over...
So it's been a couple of days and I finally feel comfortable enough to sit my ass down and write a proper review, or as proper as I could get, about This Way Out.
I'm still very much conflicted about this book as a whole, and I strongly believe that that feeling won't be going away anytime soon.
Do I recommend This Way Out to other readers? Honestly, yes I do.
This book was fresh, certainly unique and very much refreshing to see in a sea of white people books but let me just say that if you're Arab, Asian, or you come from anywhere near said areas and you're queer, you're going to have a tough time with this book.
This Way Out was a book I did not expect to find out in the world.
Yes, books are more diverse nowadays but I still didn't expect to find a story about a South Asian (that's where Bangladesh is, right?) gay man coming out to his rather extremely religious Muslim family and getting his heart absolutely shattered at the vitriol that came out of them.
Was that a lot? Yes, but that's how I felt when I was reading it.
I related so strongly to Amar, to this book in general that I got overly emotional several times throughout the reading process.
It hurt so fucking much seeing how his family turned against him, especially the unforgivable shit that Asad threw at his younger brother after he came out to them. That's the fear of every Arab queer person, to have their family turn against them if they ever found the courage to come out so yes, that was extremely hard to read for me.
Did the majority of them recover by the end? Yes, in a way, but it was very hard to overcome what had happened at the coming out scene.
Amar as a main character wasn't the most likeable one.
Self-absorbed, extremely whiny and bitchy throughout the whole book, he spent the entire time being overly dramatic, extremely sensitive, complaining about white people and judging them which I completely understood. White people can suck ass a lot of the time, but how hypocritical can you be when you don't want them to judge you and make assumptions about you when you're doing the exact same thing to them throughout the entire book?
He just wasn't likeable to me, which was the first strike for this book.
The other characters that were introduced here were certainly... Interesting.
His bestfriend, whose name I forgot, was fun if a tad one dimensional because she never had too much to do beside comfort and be there for him whenever he was losing it, which was for the majority of the book.
His fiance, Joshua, was the most bland of all the white men I've ever read about. Plus, he was Amar's punching bag throughout the book. He literally had no character traits, and he was always blamed for not understanding where Amar comes from or a lot about his culture, and while I get that... He's a middle class white man from England, if you're not there to helo educate him about your culture, how is he going to learn anything about it?
I did very much enjoy the queer Muslim group he joins in the second half of the book, mainly because it made Amar feel seen and that he wasn't alone in this.
Very big fan of the therapy aspect to the book, which felt necessary since Amar was a MESS.
What I wasn't a fan of was him being prejudiced against therapy, saying it's for white middle aged women and that it's not for people of color like us.
Yes, I get it, he wasn't wrong when he said that we were expected to bottle everything in and not discuss our emotions, but this book was written and set in 2022 so that was an unacceptable way of thinking.
This book felt very personal to me, because I related, heavily, to a lot of it, but at the same time I can acknowledge how problematic and just generally not great it was in a lot of places (don't get me started on the Tiktok storyline, because that's probably just a me thing being annoyed at it for being too modern lol).
When I say it felt personal, I mean that it felt very personal. No, I am not a Muslim queer man from Bangladesh, but I am a queer man from a Muslim country so I've seen all there is to see when it comes to how queer men are treated if discovered, so I can confidently say that I get it.
The ending worked, even though I still didn't buy Joshua and Amar as a couple, but it worked.
Most of Amar's family being there for him at his wedding really made me emotional, because even if it wasn't 100% realistic, it gave me hope that shit like that could still happen in today's world.
In This Way Out, we follow Amar, a young man on his journey to gain his deeply religious family's acceptance of his fiance, who happens to be a man. Amar is a troubled, but loving, main character who struggles with his family's lack of acceptance and how that will shape his relationship with his fiance, Joshua.
This book was a very deep and thorough dive into Amar's thoughts and experiences. It was very raw and emotional, and I found myself deeply invested in Amar's life. Majority of the gay romances I've read were more lighthearted and comical, but This Way Out is a perfect example of how reality isn't always as nice as fiction. Amar deals with real family issues that aren't often addressed in LGBTQIA+ fiction. Nothing is swept under the rug or is simple, there's always more to the story.
Highly recommend This Way Out. It is a brilliant novel, and shows the rough reality that a lot of gay people of color or of religious background have to go through. However, this is a tough read and I think the beginning was hard to get into. And the main character Amar was flawed - but that's how it is in real life. No one is perfect, and This Way Out is definitely filled with unperfect people. I also felt the ending was a little rush, and not as realistic as the rest of the book. While I absolutely loved that Amar's family ended up being there for him at his wedding, after all the harsh things they said, I didn't think it was the most realistic unfortunately.
Please note that I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for a honest review :)
A quick and easy read that I found myself picking up after a long day to unwind. The characters are beautifully written and I came to love them within the first few pages and was rooting for them all the way to the end. At times I wanted to stop reading because I just wanted the experience to go on for longer.
Thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
I found much to enjoy, appreciate, and learn about This Way Out — a richly-explored story with memorable characters.
3.5stars
The blurb is completely misleading, it is shown as fun romcom but the romance takes little space in the story and it treats way deeper and darker themes.
It is a story of coming out (prompted by the upending wedding) in a traditional muslim family, his story of loss, mental health and spirituality and where does his relationship fit in all that chaos. In order for Amar to be ok with his relationship, he needed to take care of himself and solve where he saw himself in all that mess, how could he combine being gay and muslim.
I couldn't stand the all too goodie white savior mother-in-law, Amar's family wasn't backwards because they were muslim, but because they were deeply religious and you would find those issues in any deeply religious person from any religion. Other spirituality is possible and Amar finds it possible.
It was a good coming-out story dealing with religion and mental health really well.
The main issues were with the pacing and narration, which sometimes derailed and became more an internal monologue than a narration. Amar was really self absorbed and selfish, he needed to work through his issues: the loss of his mother, his family's acceptance of his sexuality. It was a great evolution. It ended all too well, that opposed to the beginning doesnt sound plausible.
I didnt buy Amar and Joshua as a couple because Joshua was the most bland character ever with no real depth but the ending kinda worked out.
This Way Out is one of my favorite reads this year.
Amar's getting married and it's time to tell his family. The only problem? Amar's family doesn't know he's gay.
This LGBTQ+ story is centered on a Muslim protagonist that finds his place in the world. I've never read a story quite like it before. Grief, loss, family ties broken and possibly mended, plus learning to communicate with your partner like you never have before. What's not to love?
Tufayel Ahmed's writing is extremely down-to-earth. While Amar's experiences are unlike anything I'll ever endure, the way Amar's hardship is described is perfect. Our protagonist is teetering on losing his religion. The clear descriptions and Amar's point of view make this section of the story extremely endearing.
I must say, Amar's quick wit and self-reflection were a few of my favorite parts of this lovely story.
Special thanks to NetGalley for this ARC!
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I liked this book. The premise of the story was really good, but I feel as if the execution could have been a little bit more refined.
The story followed a queer Bangladeshi man and his journey to acceptance.
A good read, and I will definitely keep an eye out for more books from the author
3/5 stars
Thank you Netgalley for providing me with an arc
A love story that is grounded in reality, 'This Way out' explores religion, culture, family, love and grief in glorious technicolour.
Real, vivid characters who are three dimensional and make you swoon and rage - what a brilliant read
Thank you to Lake Union and NetGalley for this eARC.
This story centres a gay, Muslim, Bangladeshi man’s journey to acceptance. It explores themes of grief, culture, love, religion and family. The characters were so beautifully written and well-rounded.
Because of the themes discussed in this book, I wouldn’t consider it a romcom as Amar’s romance isn’t really a main focus topic, but I still thoroughly enjoyed this read. I’m excited to see more from this author!
This was an interesting and intriguing story about a man who is same gender loving and comes from a Muslim family. Amir has the daunting task of telling his Muslim family that he is getting married. To another man. And a white man at that. Amir was one of my favorite characters. This was an engaging and sometimes sad story. And one that can be read any time of the year, not just during pride month. I loved some of the themes that were presented throughout the story. I also enjoyed some of the cultural references presented in the story. I am anticipating the next book from this author. I enjoyed this read very much. This will not be my last read from this author
This is not my first book about a gay romance. The best one I've read, though, is unquestionably this one.
Ahmed starts off kind of stumbling. Thoughts of him being anxious while writing the story initially pass through your mind (seamlessly), and you soon find yourself drawn into the narrative.
My familiarity with Muslim culture is limited because I'm a biracial woman from the Caribbean. I can honestly admit that, despite my understanding of the struggles faced by LGBTQ+ persons who come out to their families, I never really gave the cultural aspects of it much thought or considered how they may make an already challenging situation much more challenging.
The experiences Joshua and Amar have in this narrative are eye-opening. Again, not in the conventional "gay coming out of the closet" sense, but rather the entire impact of how far it extends, how it crosses cultural boundaries, how to incorporate cultural differences—things you don't necessarily consider when reading a coming out romance.
I became so invested in Amar's journey in this book that I started crying, laughing, and yelling aloud.
Even the most cynical among us can learn from this lovely tale that we never truly glimpse the broader picture. This book did educate me to be cautious and to consider both the individual and their culture. Additionally, don't hesitate to ask questions. People prefer that you make an assumption rather than ask.
I heartily endorse this book. Truly. It was out of my comfort zone for me, and I was quite uncomfortable at first, but I'm pleased I sat through the awkwardness and learnt.
Please. Read this now. You might perhaps learn something in addition to the fascinating plot and fantastic characters.
I do agree with some reviews that the book seems almost like it is meant for a white audience for the first few chapters--I think there was a lot of explaining that people with cultural literacy, regardless of background, wouldn't need, and I would've liked it a bit better if it got rid of some of that. However, I still really enjoyed the story, and like the writing.
I loved all the characters in this book - they seemed so real and made me feel all of their emotions. It is a great love story but also covers so much more - family dynamics and religion and all the issues these cause to life and relationships. 5 stars!!
I'm an own voices for This Way Out with the muslim representation. I feel like muslim rep is subjective and difficult to assess when you know that the book is also a self-insert. This way out is a cross between Crazy, Rich Asians and The Love Match. It's a cute book that's also good for fans of Becky Albertalli.
Unfortuntely, while this book had a great, interesting start, it started to fall flat by the middle, and I did end up skim reading the last half. This book is great to get a deeper understanding of gay Muslims, and the challenges they go through, however from a story telling perspective, it's very tell, not show. There were a lot of inner monologue paragraphs I could easily skip without feeling like I'd lost a lot of the plot. So, while informative, I wouldn't say the writing was the most engaging.
Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.
honestly it’s not a typical storyline I usually ready but the blurb hooked me in and I read this in a day
This Way Out is an emotional yet also at time humorous contemporary novel about Amar, a gay British-Bangladeshi muslim man who comes out to his family after getting engaged.
I found Amar to be a realistic MC. Like yes, he's a bit of a mess and doesn't always make the right choices/ react the right way but, in his defence, he is also going through a lot for most of the story.
There were also another couple of aspects of this book I really liked. Firstly, Amar starts therapy in this book and, though he's quite dismissive of the idea at first, we see how it helps him to better understood his own actions and feelings, and encourages him to reach out to others who have had similar experiences.
This links to the second plotline I really liked, which was seeing Amar reach out and connect with other queer Muslims, and learning and contemplating how to reconnect with his religion and culture alongside being queer. (Though I, obviously, can't speak to the accuracy of this rep in these scenes.)
The main downside of this book for me was that the side characters were a bit bland, especially Amar's white fiance, Joshua, meaning I wasn't that invested in their relationship.
Overall though, this was still a good read, ideal for anyone looking for an emotive coming out story that also explores identity and culture.
This Way Out by Tufayel Ahmed is an impressive and emotional debut about coming out, family, grief and love that takes its protagonist, and the reader on a real journey of learning about self acceptance.
We meet Amar, a Bangladeshi Muslim born and raised in London's East end who is still coming to terms with the death of his mother three years before on the day that he decides to come out as Gay to his entire family by the tried and trusted method of group text. He knows that this decision could easily blow up in his face, his father and elder brother in particular are quite religious and unlikely to accept this new reality, but the reason he needs to do it now is that he is getting married to Josh, his boyfriend of the past few years. When he finally braves meeting with his family in person, the reactions range from supportive to completely disowning him and soon Ahmed is questioning everything he thought he knew about his family, his faith and his relationship.
I was totally engrossed by this powerful story set in a culture that I know little about, and really felt for Ahmed as a character. I was impressed by how the author tackled issues like racist micro aggressions and the value of self acceptance as well as the importance of allowing yourself to grieve the loss of a loved one. His growth as a character over the course of the book was what kept me reading and rooting for him as he gradually began to find himself, feel more comfortable in his faith and open up to Josh about the things that had been upsetting him that he had been bottling up.
I read and reviewed an ARC courtesy of NetGalley and the publisher, all opinions are my own.